Izimpawu ze-10 ze-Covert Narcissism

-Delile

• Ukuzwela okuphezulu kokugxekwa
• Ukuhlukumeza okungatheni
• Ukuthambekela kokuzibeka phansi
• Imvelo enamahloni noma ehoxisiwe
• Amaphupho amakhulu
• Imizwa yokudangala, ukukhathazeka nokuphelelwa yithemba
• Ukuthambekela kokubamba amagqubu
• Umona
• Imizwa yokungafaneleki
• Uzwelo lokuzenzela
• Okubalulekile

Igama elithi "narcissist" lijikijelwa kakhulu. Kuvame ukusetshenziswa njengokubamba konke ukuchaza abantu abananoma yiziphi izici zokuphazamiseka kobuntu be-narcissistic (NPD).

Laba bantu bangabonakala benobugovu noma bagxile ekubalulekeni kwabo uqobo futhi balahlekelwe ukuxhumana neqiniso. Noma mhlawumbe ababonakali bekhathalela abanye futhi bathembele ekukhohlisweni ukuze bathole abakufunayo.

Eqinisweni, i-NPD ayilula kangako. Kwenzeka ebangeni elibanzi elibandakanya izici ezahlukahlukene ezingaba khona. Ochwepheshe ngokuvamile bayavuma ukuthi kunezinhlayiyana ezine ezihlukile. Enye yazo i-narcissism efihlekile, ebizwa nangokuthi i-narcissism esengozini.

I-covert narcissism imvamisa ifaka izimpawu ezimbalwa zangaphandle ze-"classic" NPD. Abantu basenayo imibandela yokuxilongwa kodwa banezici ezingavamisile ukuhlotshaniswa nobudlova, njenge:

• amahloni
• ukuthobeka
• ukuzwela kulokho abanye abakucabangayo ngabo

Lezi zimpawu ezilandelayo zingakhomba futhi ekufihleni i-narcissism. Hlala wazi ukuthi ngungcweti oqeqeshiwe wezempilo yengqondo kuphela ongahlola isimo sempilo yengqondo.

Uma uzibonile lezi zimfanelo kumuntu omthandayo, bakhuthaze ukuthi bafune ukwesekwa kumelaphi oqeqeshelwe ukusiza abantu abanezinkinga zobuntu.

Ukuzwela okuphezulu kokugxekwa

I-NPD imvamisa ifaka ukungavikeleki kanye nokuzethemba okulimala kalula. Lokhu kungabonakalisa ekusithekeni kwe-narcissism njengokuzwela okukhulu ekugxekweni.

Lokhu kuzwela akwehlukile ku-NPD, kunjalo. Iningi labantu alikuthandi ukugxekwa, ngisho ukugxeka okwakhayo. Kepha ukunaka ukuthi umuntu uphendula kanjani ekugxekweni kwangempela noma okubonakalayo kunganikeza ukuqonda okwengeziwe kokuthi ngabe ubheka ukuzwela kwe-narcissistic.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile bangenza izinkulumo ezilahlayo noma ezihlekisayo futhi benze sengathi bangaphezu kokugxekwa. Kodwa ngaphakathi, bangazizwa bengenalutho, belulazekile noma bethukuthele.

Ukugxekwa kusongela ukuzibona kwabo okulungile ngokwabo. Lapho bethola ukugxekwa esikhundleni sokunconywa, bangakuthatha kanzima kakhulu.

Ukuhlukumeza okungatheni

Iningi labantu kungenzeka ukuthi lisebenzise le ndlela yokukhohlisa ngasikhathi sinye, mhlawumbe ngaphandle kokuqaphela. Kepha abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile bavame ukusebenzisa isimilo esingenzi lutho ukudlulisa ukukhungatheka noma bazenze babukeke bephakeme.

Izizathu ezimbili eziyinhloko ezenza lokhu kuziphatha:

• inkolelo ejulile “ubungcweti” babo bubavumela ukuba bathole abakufunayo
• isifiso sokubuyela kubantu ababaphathe kabi noma abaphumelela kakhulu

Ukuziphatha okunolaka kungabandakanya:

• ukonakalisa umsebenzi womuntu noma ubungani
• Amazwi okugcona noma okuhlekisa anamahlaya
• ukuphathwa buthule
• ukuguqula amacala okucashile okwenza abanye abantu bazizwe kabi noma bangabaze ukuthi kwenzekeni ngempela
• ukubambezela imisebenzi abayithatha njengengaphansi kwabo

Ukuthambekela kokuzibeka phansi

Isidingo sokunconywa yisici esiyinhloko se-NPD. Lesi sidingo sivame ukuholela abantu ekuziqhayiseni ngempumelelo yabo, imvamisa ngokwenza ihaba noma ukuqamba amanga okusobala.

UMaury Joseph, i-PsyD, uphakamisa ukuthi lokhu kungahle kuhlobene nezinkinga zokuzethemba zangaphakathi.

"Abantu abane-narcissism kufanele bachithe isikhathi esiningi beqinisekisa ukuthi abayizwa imizwa emibi, ukuthi abazizwa bengaphelele noma benamahloni noma benqunyelwe noma bancane," kuchaza yena.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile bathembela nakwabanye ukwakha ukuzethemba kwabo, kepha esikhundleni sokukhuluma ngokwabo, bathambekele ekuzithobeni phansi.

Bangakhuluma ngesizotha ngeminikelo yabo ngenhloso eyisisekelo yokuthola ukuncoma nokwaziwa. Noma bangancoma ukuthola imbuyiselo.

Imvelo enamahloni noma ehoxisiwe

I-covert narcissism ixhunyaniswe ngokuqinile nokungeniswa kunezinye izinhlobo ze-narcissism.

Lokhu kuhlobene nokungavikeleki kwe-narcissistic. Abantu abane-NPD besaba kakhulu ukuthi amaphutha abo noma ukwehluleka kwabo kubonwe abanye. Ukudalula imizwa yabo yangaphakathi yokuzenyeza kungaphazamisa inkohliso yokuphakama kwabo. Ukugwema ukuxhumana nomphakathi kusiza ukunciphisa amathuba okuvezwa.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile bangagwema nezimo zenhlalo noma ubudlelwano obungenazo izinzuzo ezicacile. Bazizwa ngasikhathi sinye baphakeme futhi bathambekele ekungabethembi abanye.

Ucwaningo oluvela ku-2015 lukhombisa nokuthi ukuphatha ukucindezeleka okuhambisana ne-NPD kungakucindezela emoyeni, kushiye amandla amancane okwakha ubudlelwano obunenjongo.

Amaphupho amakhulu

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile ngokuvamile bachitha isikhathi esiningi becabanga ngamakhono abo nempumelelo yabo kunokukhuluma ngabo. Bangase babonakale bengama-smug noma benesimo esithi "Ngizokukhombisa".

"Bangase bahoxe kumnandi, bangene ezweni elingaphakathi elilandayo elingalingani neqiniso, lapho bekhulise khona ukubaluleka, amandla, noma okhethekile okuphambene nokuthi impilo yabo yangempela injani," kusho uJoseph.

Amafantasy angabandakanya:

• ukuhlonishwa ngamakhono abo nokukhushulwa emsebenzini
• ukunconywa ngokukhanga kwabo nomaphi lapho beya khona
• ukuthola ukunconywa ngokusindisa abantu enhlekeleleni

Imizwa yokudangala, ukukhathazeka nokuphelelwa yithemba

I-covert narcissism ibandakanya ubungozi obukhulu bokuvela kokudangala nokukhathazeka kunezinye izinhlobo ze-narcissism.

Kunezizathu ezimbili ezinkulu zalokhu:

• Ukwesaba ukwehluleka noma ukuvezwa kungaba nomthelela ekukhathazekeni.
• Ukukhungatheka ngenxa yokulindela okulindelekile okungahambisani nempilo yangempela, kanye nokwehluleka ukuthola ukwazisa okudingekayo kwabanye, kungadala imizwa yentukuthelo nokudangala.

Imizwa yokungabi nalutho nemicabango yokuzibulala nayo ihlotshaniswa ne-narcissism efihlekile.

“Abantu abanengcindezi ejulile yokuba bathokozise futhi bathandeke kubo kufanele benze konke okusemandleni ukugcina lokho kugcinwa nokuzethemba kwabo. Ukwehluleka ukugcina leyo nkohliso kuhilela imizwa emibi eza neqiniso lokwehluleka, ”kusho uJoseph.

Ukuthambekela kokubamba amagqubu

Umuntu one-narcissism efihlekile angabamba amagqubu isikhathi eside.

Lapho bekholelwa ukuthi othile ubaphathe ngokungafanele, bangazizwa bethukuthele kodwa bangasho lutho okwamanje. Esikhundleni salokho, maningi amathuba okuthi balinde ithuba elifanele lokwenza omunye umuntu abukeke kabi noma aziphindiselele ngandlela thile.

Lokhu kuziphindisela kungahle kube kobuqili noma kube ngolaka. Isibonelo, bangaqala amahemuhemu noma bacekele phansi umsebenzi womuntu.

Bangaphinda babambele amagqubu abantu abathola ukunconywa noma ukuqashelwa abacabanga ukuthi banelungelo lakho, njengomuntu osebenza naye othola ukwenyuselwa okufanelekile.

Lawa magqubu angaholela entukuthelweni, intukuthelo, nasekufiseni ukuziphindisela.

Umona

Abantu abane-NPD bavame ukuhalela abantu abanezinto abazizwa zifanelekile, kufaka phakathi ingcebo, amandla, noma isikhundla. Babuye bavame ukukholelwa ukuthi abanye baba nomona ngabo ngoba bakhethekile futhi baphakeme.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile kungenzeka bangakhulumi ngaphandle ngale mizwa yomona, kepha bangabonisa ukufutheka noma intukuthelo lapho bengakutholi abakholelwa ukuthi bakufanele.

Imizwa yokungafaneleki

Lapho abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile bengakwazi ukuhlangabezana nezindinganiso eziphakeme abazibekele zona, bangazizwa benganele ekuphenduleni lokhu kwehluleka.

Le mizwa yokungafaneleki ingadala:

• amahloni
• intukuthelo
• umuzwa wokungabi namandla

UJoseph uphakamisa ukuthi lokhu kusekelwe ekuqageleni.

Abantu abane-NPD banamazinga angenangqondo ngokwabo, ngakho-ke ngokungazi bacabanga ukuthi abanye abantu nabo bababambe kulezi zindinganiso. Ukuze baphile ngokuvumelana nabo, kufanele babe namandla angaphezu kwawomuntu.Lapho bebona ukuthi empeleni bangabantu nje, baba namahloni ngalokhu “kwehluleka”.

Uzwelo lokuzenzela

Ngokuphikisana nenkolelo evamile, kungenzeka ukuthi abantu abane-NPD okungenani umbukiso uzwela. Kepha bachitha isikhathi esiningi bezama ukwakha ukuzethemba kwabo futhi baqinisa ukubaluleka kwabo okuvame ukungena endleleni, ngokusho kukaJoseph.

Abantu abane-narcissism efihlekile, ikakhulukazi, bangabonakala benozwelo kwabanye. Bangabonakala bazimisele ukusiza abanye noma bathathe umsebenzi owengeziwe.

Ungababona benza isenzo somusa noma sozwelo, njengokupha imali nokudla umuntu olala emgwaqeni, noma ukunikela ngegumbi labo lokulala elenzelwe ilungu lomndeni elakhishwa.

Kepha ngokuvamile benza lezi zinto ukuthola ukwamukelwa abanye. Uma bengakutholi ukunconywa noma ukunconywa ngokuzidela kwabo, bangazizwa benomunyu futhi benentukuthelo futhi bakhulume ngendlela abantu abasizakala ngayo futhi bangabazisi.

Okubalulekile

I-narcissism iyinkimbinkimbi kakhulu kunalokho okwenziwe isiko le-pop. Ngenkathi abantu abanokuthambekela kwe-narcissistic kungabonakala njengama-apula amabi okufanele agwenywe, uJoseph uveza ukubaluleka kokuzwela kumandla we-narcissistic.

“Wonke umuntu unazo. Sonke sifuna ukuzizwa silungile emehlweni ethu. Sonke sinengcindezi yokuthi sifane nemibono yethu, sizenze isithombe esithile, futhi senza zonke izinhlobo zezinto ukudala inkohliso yokuthi silungile, kufaka phakathi ukuzikhohlisa thina nabanye, ”usho kanje.

Abanye abantu banesikhathi esilula kunabanye ngokulawula le mizwa nemizwa. Labo abalwa nabo bangaba namathuba amaningi okuthuthukisa i-NPD noma esinye isifo sobuntu.

Uma othile omaziyo enezimpawu ze-NPD, qiniseka ukuthi uyazinakekela, futhi. Bheka izimpawu zokuhlukunyezwa futhi usebenze nomelaphi onganikeza ukuholwa nokusekelwa.

UCrystal Raypole wake wasebenza njengombhali nomhleli weGoodTherapy. Imikhakha yakhe enentshisekelo ifaka izilimi nezincwadi zase-Asia, ukuhunyushwa kwesiJapane, ukupheka, isayensi yemvelo, ukuzethemba ngocansi, nempilo yengqondo. Ngokukhethekile, uzibophezele ekusizeni ukunciphisa ukucwaswa okuzungeze izingqinamba zezempilo yengqondo.