Ungasekela Kanjani Ngokomzwelo

-Delile

• Yini
• Buza…
• … Futhi ulalele
• Qinisekisa
• Gwema ukwahlulela
• Yeqa iseluleko
• Ubuqiniso ngaphezu kokuphelela
• Zakhe
• Sekela izixazululo zabo
• Nikeza uthando lomzimba
• Gwema ukunciphisa
• Yenza isenzo esihle
• Hlela umsebenzi ophazamisayo
• Phinda uhlole
• Okubalulekile

Ukusekelwa kuza ngezindlela eziningi.

Ungahle unikeze ukusekelwa ngokomzimba kothile onenkinga yokuma noma ukuhamba, noma ukusekelwa kwezezimali kothandekayo endaweni eqinile.

Ezinye izinhlobo zokusekelwa zibalulekile, nazo. Abantu abasempilweni yakho njengamalungu omndeni, abangani, ngisho nabantu osebenza nabo abasondelene, bangakusiza bakuphakamise ngokomzwelo ngokunikeza ukusekelwa kwezenhlalo nangokomzwelo.

Yini

Abantu babonisa ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo kwabanye ngokunikeza isikhuthazo sangempela, isiqinisekiso, nozwela. Lokhu kungafaka izinto ezinjengamazwi wokuzwelana noma izenzo zomzimba zothando.

Ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo kungavela kweminye imithombo, futhi - imithombo yenkolo noma engokomoya, imisebenzi yomphakathi, noma nezilwane ezifuywayo. Noma ngabe yiluphi uhlobo oluthathayo, lokhu kusekelwa kungathuthukisa umbono wanoma ngubani nenhlalakahle ejwayelekile.

Abanye abantu banekhono lokusekela ngokomzwelo, kodwa leli khono alizi ngokwemvelo kuwo wonke umuntu.

Ungawathuthukisa la makhono, noma kunjalo, ngokwenza okuncane. Qhubeka ufundele amathiphu ayi-13 wokunikeza ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo kwekhwalithi kunoma ngubani empilweni yakho.

Buza…

Lapho ufuna ukunikeza ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo kothile omkhathalelayo, ukubuza imibuzo embalwa kuyindawo enhle yokuqala.

“Ngingakusekela kanjani?” kwesinye isikhathi ingasebenza, kepha akuyona njalo indlela engcono kakhulu.

Yize izinhloso ezinhle zisemuva kwemibuzo enjengale, kwesinye isikhathi ziyehluleka ukuba nomthelela owufisayo.

Abantu abazi njalo ukuthi bafunani noma badingani, ikakhulukazi phakathi kwesimo esinzima. Ngakho-ke, lo mbuzo ungaba banzi ushiye umuntu engaqiniseki ukuthi uzophendula kanjani.

Esikhundleni salokho, zama ukubuza imibuzo ehambelana nesimo noma isimo somuntu womuntu, njenge:

• “Ubonakala uthukuthele kancane namhlanje. Ungathanda ukukhuluma ngakho? ”
• “Ngiyazi ukuthi umphathi wakho ubekunikeza isikhathi esinzima. Uqhubeke kanjani? ”

Uma wazi ukuthi othile ubhekane nezinselelo ezithile futhi awazi ukuthi uzoyivula kanjani ingxoxo, zama ukuqala ngemibuzo ejwayelekile, efana nokuthi, "Kade kwenzekani empilweni yakho muva nje?"

Zama ukugcina imibuzo yakho ivulekile esikhundleni sokubuza imibuzo engaphendulwa ngo- "yebo" noma "cha." Lokhu kumema incazelo futhi kusiza ekugcineni ingxoxo iqhubeka.

… Futhi ulalele

Akwanele ukumane ubuze imibuzo. Ukulalela ngenkuthalo, noma ngozwela, kungenye ingxenye ebalulekile yokunikeza ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo.

Uma u ngempela lalela umuntu, umlalelise ngokugcwele. Khombisa intshisekelo kumagama abo ngoku:

• ukubonisa ulimi oluvulekile lomzimba, njengokuguqula umzimba wakho ubheke kubo, ukukhulula ubuso bakho, noma ukugcina izingalo nemilenze yakho kunganqamuki
• ukugwema iziphazamiso, njengokudlala nefoni yakho noma ukucabanga ngezinye izinto okudingeka uzenze
• ukunqekuzisa amakhanda kanye namazwi abo noma ukwenza imisindo yesivumelwano esikhundleni sokuphazamisa
• ukucela ukucaciselwa lapho ungaqondi okuthile
• ukufingqa abakushilo ukukhombisa ukuthi usiqonda kahle isimo

Ukusebenzisa amakhono okulalela amahle kukhombisa abanye ukuthi uyabakhathalela ababhekene nakho. Kumuntu onenkinga, ukwazi ukuthi omunye umuntu ubuzwile ubuhlungu babo kungenza umehluko omkhulu.

Qinisekisa

Cabanga ngesikhathi sokugcina lapho ubhekene nento enzima. Cishe ubufuna ukukhuluma nothile ngenkinga, kepha kungenzeka ukuthi ubungafuni ukuthi bakulungisele yona noma bayiqede.

Mhlawumbe ubufuna nje ukuveza ukukhungatheka noma ukudumala kwakho bese uthola ukuvuma okuthobekile.

Ukusekelwa akudingi ukuthi uqonde ngokugcwele inkinga noma unikeze isisombululo. Imvamisa, akubandakanyi lutho ngaphandle kokuqinisekisa.

Uma uqinisekisa othile, umazisa ukuthi ubona futhi uyaqonda umbono wakhe.

Ukwesekwa abantu abavame ukukufuna kakhulu ukuqaphela ukucindezeleka kwabo. Ngakho-ke, lapho othandekayo ekutshela ngezinselelo ababhekana nazo, kungenzeka bangakudingi ukuthi ungene uzokusiza. Ungahle unikeze ukusekelwa okuhle kakhulu ngokumane ubonise ukukhathazeka nokunikela ngobukhona obakhathalelayo.

Eminye imishwana yokuqinisekisa ongayisebenzisa yile:

• “Ngiyaxolisa ukuthi ubhekene naleso simo. Kuzwakala kubuhlungu kakhulu. ”
• “Kuzwakala kucasula kakhulu lokho. Ngiyakuqonda ukuthi kungani uzizwa unengcindezi njengamanje. ”

Gwema ukwahlulela

Akekho othanda ukuzwa ukwahlulelwa. Umuntu obhekene nesimo esinzima ngenxa yezenzo zakhe kungenzeka ukuthi usezenzile ukwahlulela okuthile.

Akunandaba, lapho befuna ukwesekwa, abantu ngokuvamile abafuni ukuzwa ukugxekwa - noma ngabe unikeza ukugxeka okwakhayo ngezinhloso ezinhle kakhulu.

Lapho unikeza ukwesekwa, zama ukugcina imibono yakho kulokho obekufanele ngabe bakwenzile noma ukuthi konakelephi kuwe.

Gwema ukubuza imibuzo abangayichaza njengokusola noma ukwahlulela, njengokuthi, "Manje yini ebenze bakuthukuthelela kangaka?"

Noma unganikeli ukwahlulela okuqondile noma ukugxeka, ithoni ingadlulisa imizwa eminingi, ngakho-ke izwi lakho lingabelana ngemizwa obungahlosile ukuyisho ngokuqondile.

Qaphela ukugcina amanothi wokungamukeleki aphuma ezwini lakho ngokugxila emizweni efana nozwelo nozwela lapho ukhuluma.

Yeqa iseluleko

Ungase ucabange ukuthi usiza umuntu othile ngokumtshela ukuthi alungise kanjani inkinga. Kepha, uma kukhulunywa nje, abantu abasifuni iseluleko ngaphandle kokuthi basicele.

Noma ngabe wena yazi unesixazululo esifanele, ungasinikeli ngaphandle uma bebuza ngokukhethekile okuthile okufana nokuthi, "Ucabanga ukuthi kufanele ngenzeni?" noma "Ingabe kukhona okukhona ongakusiza?"

Uma besukile "ekuvezeni" baya "ekukhulumeni ngenkinga," indlela engcono ivame ukufaka imibuzo ekhombisa ukubasiza ukuze bathole izixazululo bebodwa.

Isibonelo, ungahle usho okuthile okufana nalokhu:

• “Wake waba sesimeni esinjengalesi phambilini? Yini eyasiza lapho? ”
• "Ingabe kukhona izinguquko ongazicabanga ezingakusiza uzizwe ungcono?"

Ubuqiniso ngaphezu kokuphelela

Uma ufuna ukuxhasa umuntu, ungakhathazeki kakhulu ngokuthi ngabe unikeza uhlobo loxhaso "olulungile".

Abantu ababili abahlukene ngokuvamile ngeke banikeze ukusekelwa ngendlela efanayo. Kulungile, nokho, ngoba kunezindlela eziningi zokusekela umuntu.

Indlela yakho ingahluka futhi kuye ngomuntu ofuna ukumsekela.

Esikhundleni sokufuna into enhle ongayisho, hamba kokuzwakala kungokwemvelo futhi kuyiqiniso. Ukuvezwa kwangempela kokukhathazeka cishe kungasho lukhulu kothandekayo wakho kunempendulo esemathinini noma eyodwa engenawo umuzwa weqiniso.

Zakhe

Izikhathi zobunzima bomuntu siqu, ikakhulukazi lezo ezibandakanya ukwenqatshwa, zingehlisa abantu futhi zibenze bazingabaze namakhono abo.

Uma ubona umuntu omkhathalelayo ebonakala sengathi uphansi kancane, kunzima kakhulu kuye kunokujwayelekile, noma uzenyeza ngokungazithembi, ukuncoma okuqotho noma okubili kungasiza kakhulu ekwenzeni ngcono umbono wabo.

Uma unikeza ukuncoma, uzofuna ukugcina izinto ezimbalwa engqondweni:

• Zigcine zihambisana nesimo samanje. Isibonelo, ungakhumbuza umngani wakho othukuthele ngephutha emsebenzini mayelana nendlela yakhe ejwayelekile yokuphumelela.
• Khetha izincomo eziqokomisa amandla athile kunezincomo ezingenalutho ezingasebenza kunoma ngubani. Esikhundleni sokumane uthi "Uyacabanga kakhulu," khomba ukuthi yini ebenza bacabange futhi wabelane ngokwazisa kwakho ngalelo khono.
• Ungagudluki. Ukuncoma okubekwe kahle kungenza umuntu azizwe emuhle. Ukweqa ngokweqile kungenza abantu bangabaze izincomo, noma bangazizwa kahle (noma ngabe ubasho ngempela).

Sekela izixazululo zabo

Lapho umngani osondelene naye noma umlingani othandana naye ekholelwa ukuthi bathole impendulo enkingeni yabo, ungahle ube nokungabaza okuthile ngokusebenza kwaleyo khambi.

Ngaphandle kokuthi indlela yabo ibandakanya ubungozi noma ingozi ethile, ngokuvamile kungcono kakhulu ukunikela ukwesekwa esikhundleni sokukhomba amaphutha kuhlelo lwabo.

Kungenzeka ukuthi abakhethe indlela obungathanda ngayo, kodwa lokho akusho ukuthi banephutha. Noma ungakwazi ukubona isixazululo sabo sisebenza, awukwazi ukuthi izinto zizovela kanjani ngokuqiniseka.

Gwema ukubatshela lokho ocabanga ukuthi kufanele bakwenze, ngoba lokhu kwesinye isikhathi kungasusa noma imiphi imizwa emihle ekusekelweni osuvele ukunikeze.

Uma bebuza ukuthi ucabangani, ungabanikeza ukuholwa okuncane okungasiza uhlelo lwabo luphumelele. Noma ngabe bafuna umbono wakho oqotho, gwema ukuphendula ngokugxeka okunokhahlo noma okungekuhle noma ukubhidliza uhlelo lwabo.

Nikeza uthando lomzimba

Uthando lomzimba alufanele kuzo zonke izimo, kunjalo.

Ngokuya ngobudlelwano bakho nomuntu ofuna ukumeseka, ukwanga, ukuqabula, nokunye okuthinta nokusondelana kungabathinta kakhulu.

• Ngemuva kwengxoxo enzima, ukwanga othile kunganikeza ukusekelwa ngokomzimba okuqinisa ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo osanda kukunikeza.
• Ukubamba isandla sothandekayo ngenkathi benza inqubo ebuhlungu, ukuthola izindaba ezingathandeki, noma ukubhekana nocingo olucindezelayo kungabasiza bazizwe beqinile.
• Ukuganga nomlingani wakho ngemuva kokuthi bebe nosuku olubi kungagcizelela ngaphandle kwamagama ukugcizelela imizwa yakho ngabo futhi kunikeze induduzo yokuphulukisa.

Gwema ukunciphisa

Abantu babhekana nazo zonke izinhlobo zezimo ezingemnandi empilweni. Ezinye zalezi zinselelo zinomthelela obanzi noma ofinyelela kude kakhulu kunezinye.

Akukona okwomunye umuntu ukusho ukuthi umuntu kufanele aphatheke kabi kangakanani (noma akufanele) azizwe nganoma yiluphi uhlobo lokucindezeleka.

Ukuqhathanisa ubunzima bothandekayo nezinkinga ezibhekene nabanye abantu kuvame ukwenzeka ungahlosile, njengomzamo wokududuzeka.

Ungahle uhlose ukubathokozisa ngokusho izinto ezinjengokuthi, “Kungaba kubi kakhulu,” noma “Okungenani usenomsebenzi.” Lokhu kuphika isipiliyoni sabo futhi kuvame ukusho ukuthi akufanele bazizwe kabi kwasekuqaleni.

Kungakhathalekile ukuthi ucabanga ukuthi ukukhathazeka kothile kuyinto engasho lutho kangakanani, gwema ukukuxubha.

Impela, mhlawumbe inkulumo umngane wakho omkhulu ayithole kumphathi wakhe ibingeke ikhathaze wena. Kodwa awukwazi ukukuqonda ngokugcwele okuhlangenwe nakho kwakhe noma impendulo engokomzwelo, ngakho-ke akulungile ukunciphisa imizwa yakhe.

Yenza isenzo esihle

Othandekayo ozama ukulawula ukuxokozela okungokomzwelo angaba namandla amancane engqondo okubhekana nezibopho zabo ezijwayelekile.

Ngemuva kokuthi ulalele futhi uqinisekise imizwa yabo, ungakhombisa uzwela ngokusiza ukwenza lula umthwalo wabo, uma kungenzeka.

Akudingeki wenze noma yini enkulu noma eshanelayo. Eqinisweni, izinto ezincane zingaba nomthelela omkhulu, ikakhulukazi lapho izenzo zakho zikukhombisa ukuthi uzwile futhi wawaqonda ngempela amazwi abo.

Zama omunye walomusa omncane:

• Yenza omunye wemisebenzi yasekhaya yomlingani wakho, njengezitsha noma ukuhlanza.
• Thatha isidlo sasemini noma isidlo sakusihlwa somngani onosuku olunzima.
• Letha izimbali noma isiphuzo osithandayo noma okulula okuncane enganeni yakini edlula kokuhlukana okungathandeki.
• Nikeza ukuqhuba umsebenzi womngane ocindezelekile noma umzali.

Hlela umsebenzi ophazamisayo

Ezinye izimo ezinzima azinaso isixazululo. Ungalalela ubuhlungu kothandekayo wakho futhi unikele ngehlombe lakho (ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo) ukwesekwa.

Kepha uma isikhathi kuyindlela kuphela yokulungisa inkinga yabo, nobabili kungenzeka nizizwe ningenamandla okusiza.

Usenganikeza ukusekelwa, noma kunjalo. Umuntu obhekene nesimo esinzima angakuthola kunzima ukugxila kwezinye izinto.

Bangase bafune ukuziphazamisa ekucindezelekeni nasekukhathazekeni kepha bangazi ukuthi baqale kuphi.

Ngakolunye uhlangothi, mhlawumbe unebanga elanele ukusuka enkingeni ongaqhamuka nemibono embalwa ukuze ususe izingqondo zabo ezinkingeni zabo.

Hlela umsebenzi omnandi, ongukhiye ophansi ongawuhlela kabusha uma bengazizwa bakulungele. Imvamisa awukwazi ukungahambi kahle ngento owaziyo ukuthi bayayijabulela, njengokuhamba ngomkhondo oyintandokazi wemvelo noma uhambo oluya epaki yezinja.

Uma ungakwazi ukuphuma, zama umsebenzi wobuciko, iphrojekthi yasekhaya, noma umdlalo esikhundleni salokho.

Phinda uhlole

Lapho ususizile umuntu omthandayo ukuhlola isimo esinzima, musa ukuvele uyilahle ngokuphelele le ndaba.

Ukubuyekeza isihloko ezinsukwini ezimbalwa kubazisa ukuthi izinkinga zabo zibalulekile kuwe yize ungenakho ukubandakanyeka okusebenzayo.

Kalula, “Hheyi, bengifuna nje ukubona ukuthi ubhekana kanjani nolunye usuku. Ngiyazi ukuthi kungathatha isikhathi ukwelashwa ekuhlukaneni, ngakho ngifuna wazi ukuthi ngilapha uma uzizwa uthanda ukukhuluma futhi. ”

Bangase bangafuni ukukhuluma ngokuhlupheka kwabo ngaso sonke isikhathi - lokho kujwayelekile impela. Awudingi ukuyiletha nsuku zonke, kodwa kulungile impela ukubuza ukuthi izinto zihamba kanjani futhi ubazise ukuthi uyakhathala.

Uma becele izeluleko futhi unesisombululo esingahle sibe khona, ungasethula ngokuthi, “Uyazi, bengicabanga ngesimo sakho, futhi ngize nokuthile okungasiza. Ungathanda ukuzwa ngakho? ”

Okubalulekile

Ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo akubambeki. Awukwazi ukuwubona noma ukuwubamba ezandleni zakho futhi ungahle ungawuboni umthelela wawo zisuka, ikakhulukazi uma udonsa kanzima.

Kepha kungakukhumbuza ukuthi abanye bayakuthanda, bayakwazisa, futhi banomhlane wakho.

Uma unikeza ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo kwabanye, ubatshela ukuthi ababodwa. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, lo mlayezo ungaba nomthelela omuhle kakhulu empilweni yomzwelo kunokuqinisa imizwa yesikhashana noma izinhlobo zokusekelwa.

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