Bengifuna Ukufakazela Ukuba Umama Angeke Kungishintshe

-Delile

• Idili lesidlo sakusihlwa - nokuthi yini engikukhumbulile
• Ukuxhumana engifuna ukukugcina

Idili lesidlo sakusihlwa elaphonswa ngenkathi ngikhulelwe lalenzelwe ukukholisa abangane bami ukuthi "ngangisengimi" - kepha ngafunda okunye.

Ngaphambi kokuba ngishade, ngangihlala eNew York City, lapho mina nabangane bami besidlo sakusihlwa sasithanda ukudla ndawonye futhi siba nezingxoxo ezijulile kwaze kwaba sebusuku. Ngokwemvelo, lapho ngihlala emaphethelweni edolobha, ngangizihlanganisa kancane nabangane bami bedolobha, kodwa abazange bakhononde ngize ngamemezele ukuthi nginengane.

Esikhundleni sokungihalalisela ngokungihalalisela, iqembu lami eliyinhloko langixwayisa ukuba ngingabi yinsakavukela yasemadolobheni. Omunye empeleni uthe: "Ngicela ungabi ngomunye walabo mama abakhuluma ngezingane zakhe hhayi okunye." Hhawu.

Ngakho-ke lapho ukuba ngumama kubonakala sengathi kuvalwa ngokushesha, nginqume ukufakazela abangane bami abangabazayo (futhi kulungile, ngokwami) ukuthi ngangimdala kimi. Kanjani? Ngokuphonsa idili lesidlo sasebusuku labangane bami abathathu abasondele kakhulu nabanye babo ababalulekile. Ayikho ingane esendleleni eyayingangivimba ekuphekeni izitsha eziyisithupha kusukela ekuqaleni, ngibe nesidlo sasebusuku kwabayisishiyagalombili futhi ngikhombise wonke umuntu ukuthi bengisengumuntu omnandi kangakanani!

Idili lesidlo sakusihlwa - nokuthi yini engikukhumbulile

Nganginezinyanga eziyi-7 ngikhulelwe, isisu sonke, ngigudla ukubheka isalmon ku-broiler futhi ngifinyelela ku-tiptoe ngokuhambisa izitsha ngaphezulu kwesiqandisi. Abangane bami babelokhu becela ukusiza, kodwa ngangilokhu ngibaxosha. Umphumela waba ukudla okumnandi engingakaze ngikuphindze kusukela, eminyakeni eminingana nezingane ezimbili kamuva - kodwa ngangimatasa kakhulu ukuba ngizijabulise.

Ngivame ukucabanga ngalobo busuku lapho ngichitha isikhathi esezingeni elikahle nezingane zami kodwa ingqondo yami ikwenye indawo. Bafuna ngidlalise ukugqoka noma ngibafundele incwadi engiyithandayo futhi. Ngicabanga ukuqala isidlo sakusihlwa noma ukubhala indatshana efanele kusasa. Kepha esikhundleni sokushesha ngonakalise ubumnandi, ngiyazikhumbuza ukuthi ngehlise ijubane ngijabulele isikhathi.

Ubusuku bedili lami lokudla kwakusihlwa okokugcina lapho bonke abangane abayisishiyagalombili behlangana khona unyaka wonke. Ngangingenabuthongo, ngijwayela impilo nengane esanda kuzalwa. Abanye bebematasa ngobusha bokuthembisana umshado, ukuhlela imishado.

Ngiye ngazisola kaningi ngokungaziniki isikhathi sokujabulela inkampani yabo ngobusuku besidlo sakusihlwa, kunalokho ngigxile emandleni ami ekudleni. Ngenhlanhla, lolo lwazi lushintshe umbono wami mayelana nokuchitha isikhathi sekhwalithi nabantu ababalulekile. Futhi akekho obaluleke ukudlula izingane zami.

Ngibonile ukuthi ayikho intambo yokuba ngumama njengalapho kukhona idili lesidlo sakusihlwa, futhi uma ngihlala ngigijimela ukwenza izinto kahle lapho izingane zami zingaphansi kwezinyawo, ngizolahlekelwa yizikhathi ezihlekisayo ezenza ukuba ngumama kufanelekile.

Ngesikhathi sokudla kwami ​​kwakusihlwa, ngezwa ukuhleka okuvela egumbini lokuphumula ngenkathi ngijikisa izitsha ekhishini, kodwa ngakhetha ukweqa ubumnandi. Ngenze umzamo oqondile wokungakwenzi lokho nezingane zami. Ngingena phansi nabo. Ngigigitheka ngikitaze. Ngenza amazwi angenangqondo lapho ngiwafunda izindaba. Ngiyadansa, ngidlala umaki, futhi ngicabanga ukuthi ngiyinganekwane enomdlandla. Ukudla kwakusihlwa kungalinda. Izingane zami zizoba zincane isikhashana.

Okwamanje, ngenza konke okusemandleni ami ukunaka indodana yami nendodakazi yami. Kepha ukuba ngumama akungiphendulanga idrone enomqondo owodwa ofuna ukukhuluma ngezingqophamlando zezingane, izinkinga zokuqeqesha izimbiza, namasu okuba ngumzali, njengoba umngane wami owayengenabo ubuhlakani abikezela eminyakeni edlule. Ukuba ngumama akusishintshanga isifiso sami sokuhlangana nabangane bami abadala kunabo bonke, engibathanda kakhulu esidlweni sakusihlwa kanye nengxoxo ezwakalayo. Kunalokho, kungikhuthaze ukuthi ngixhumanise izingane zami nesikhathi sami esedlule.

Ukuxhumana engifuna ukukugcina

Noma kwesinye isikhathi kuyinkohliso ukufaka izingane ezimbili edolobheni - ikakhulukazi lapho kwakukhona izikhwama zamanabukeni kanye nezembozo zobuhlengikazi okufanele zilwisane nazo - ngenze iphuzu lokubona abangane bami bakudala kaningi ngokwanele ukuthi izingane zami zibathande njengoba ezinye zezihlobo zabo. Wonke umuntu uyaphumelela: Angiphuthelwa ubungane obusunguliwe, izingane zami zithathwa ukunakwa ngabantu abadala abakhethekile, futhi abangane bami babazi njengabantu ngabanye kunokuba nje babe nomqondo othile ongaqondakali “wezingane.”

Eminyakeni embalwa, izingane zami zizofuna ukwazi ukuthi nganginjani ngaphambi kokuba ngibe ngumama, futhi abangane bami bakudala yibo kanye engifuna baphendule leyo mibuzo ebabazekayo. Ukube bengizonqotshwa ngokuphelele yimpilo yasedolobheni futhi ngilahlekelwe ukuxhumana nabangane bami, akukho kulokhu obekungenzeka.

Kepha ngiyazinikela, ngaphandle kokuphika, ezicini ezithile zombono wokungabaza womngani wami ngobumama. Sengizitholile ngokwemvelo ngikhanga ekushintsheni kwezintshisakalo zezingane zami, okusho ukuthi ngiye ngaphusha umdwebo weminwe, amakhosazana akwaDisney, izingoma zikaTaylor Swift, nokuningi.

Kepha ubudlelwano bami nendodana yami nendodakazi yami bekungafanele bonke bube ngezintshisekelo zabo, ngakho-ke sifunda izincwadi zezithombe zakudala ebezizintandokazi zami ngawo-1970. Sidlala imidlalo engasathandeki, manje njengoba iCandy Crush isidlule iRed Rover. Futhi besipheka ndawonye kusukela izingane zami ziseyizinsana, ngoba kungenye yezinto engizithandayo… futhi ngoba ngifuna ukuthi bakwazi ukulungiselela amadili amaningi edina labangane babo ngelinye ilanga, uma kwenzeka isimo senhliziyo sihlasela.

Lapho ngibe nosuku olunzima kakhulu - ngikhala izinyembezi nokuphelelwa isikhathi namathoyizi kusakazeke yonke indawo - futhi ekugcineni ngilalisa wonke umuntu, ngizizwa ngikhathele kodwa ngiyaneliseka, ngokwazi ukuthi nginika izingane zami konke enginakho ngaphandle ukuyekethisa ubuwena uqobo, futhi bayachuma. Kukhumbuza kancane indlela engazizwa ngayo ekupheleni kwedili lami lakusihlwa lakudala.

Ngemuva kokuba abangane bami behambile futhi ngangigxishwe ekudleni futhi nginekhishi eligcwele izitsha ezingcolile, ngahlala isikhathi eside, ngikuvumela ukuthi kushone ngokuthi ngangikhulelwe kakhulu futhi ngikhathele kakhulu. Kepha angikwazanga ukuyeka ukusineka, ngoba ngibonile ukuthi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kusihlwa, ngikwazile ukukholisa osolwayo obaluleke kunabo bonke lowo mama ngeke akwazi ukuguqula lokho ebenginguye ngaphakathi: Mina .

ULisa Fields ungumbhali osebenza ngokugcwele osebenza ngokukhethekile kwezempilo, ukondleka komzimba, ukuqina komzimba, ukusebenza kwengqondo kanye nezihloko zokuba ngumzali. Umsebenzi wakhe ushicilelwe ku Reader’s Digest, WebMD, Good Housekeeping, Today’s Parent, Pregnancy, nezinye izincwadi eziningi. Ungafunda kabanzi ngomsebenzi wakhe lapha.