Ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana ezinganeni

Ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana ezinganeni kuyisigaba sokukhula lapho ingane ikhathazeka khona lapho ihlukaniswa nomnakekeli oyinhloko (imvamisa umama).

Njengoba izinsana zikhula, imizwa yabo kanye nokuphendula kwabo emhlabeni okuzungezile kubonakala kwenzeka ngokulandelana. Ngaphambi kwezinyanga eziyi-8, izinsana zintsha emhlabeni kangangokuthi azinakho ukuqonda kokujwayelekile nokuvikelekile nokuthi yini okungaba yingozi. Ngenxa yalokhu, izilungiselelo ezintsha noma abantu babonakala bengabesabi.

Kusukela ezinyangeni eziyisishiyagalombili kuya kweziyi-14, izingane zivame ukwesaba lapho zihlangana nabantu abasha noma zivakashela izindawo ezintsha. Bayabona ukuthi abazali babo bajwayelene futhi baphephile. Lapho behlukanisiwe nabazali babo, bazizwa besongelwa futhi bengaphephile.

Ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana yisigaba esijwayelekile njengoba ingane ikhula futhi ikhula. Kusize ukugcina okhokho bethu bephila futhi kusiza izingane zifunde ukuthi zingalisebenzisa kanjani izwe elibazungezile.

Imvamisa kuphela lapho ingane isineminyaka emibili ubudala. Kule minyaka, izingane ziqala ukuqonda ukuthi abazali kungenzeka bangabonakali manje, kodwa bazobuya ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Kujwayelekile futhi ukuthi bavivinye ukuzimela kwabo.

Ukweqa ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana, izingane zidinga:

• Zizwe uphephile ekhaya labo.
• Thembela kwabanye abantu ngaphandle kwabazali babo.
• Bathembe ukuthi abazali babo bazobuya.

Ngisho nangemva kokuba izingane sezikwazi kahle lesi sigaba, ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana kungabuya ngezikhathi zengcindezi. Iningi lezingane lizozwa ukukhathazeka okuhlukile lapho lisezimweni ezingajwayelekile, imvamisa lapho lihlukaniswe nabazali bazo.

Lapho izingane zisezimweni (njengezibhedlela) futhi zingaphansi kwengcindezi (njengokugula noma ubuhlungu), zifuna ukuphepha, induduzo, nokuvikelwa kwabazali bazo. Njengoba ukukhathazeka kungadala ubuhlungu, ukuhlala nengane ngangokunokwenzeka kunganciphisa ubuhlungu.

Ingane enokukhathazeka okukhulu ngokuhlukana ingahle ibe nokulandelayo:

• Ukucindezeleka ngokweqile lapho kuhlukaniswa nomnakekeli oyinhloko
• Amaphupho amabi
• Ukungafuni ukuya esikoleni noma kwezinye izindawo ngenxa yokwesaba ukwehlukana
• Ukungafuni ukulala ngaphandle komnakekeli oyinhloko eduze
• Izikhalazo zomzimba eziphindiwe
• Ukukhathazeka ngokulahlekelwa, noma ukulimala okuza kumnakekeli oyinhloko

Azikho izivivinyo zalesi simo, ngoba sejwayelekile.

Uma ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana okweqile kuqhubeka nobudala obudlule 2, ukuvakashelwa nomhlinzeki wezokunakekelwa kwezempilo kungasiza ekunqumeni ukuthi ingane inenkinga yokukhathazeka noma esinye isimo.

Akukho ukwelashwa okudingekayo ekukhathazekeni okujwayelekile kokuhlukana.

Abazali bangasiza izingane zabo ezisacathula noma ezisacathula ukuthi zijwayele ukungabikho kwabo ngokuvumela abanakekeli abathembekile ukuthi bagade ingane. Lokhu kusiza ingane ukuthi ifunde ukuthembela nokubopha abanye abantu abadala futhi iqonde ukuthi abazali bayo bazobuya.

Ngesikhathi sezinqubo zokwelashwa, umzali kufanele ahambe nengane uma kungenzeka. Lapho umzali engakwazi ukuhamba nengane, ukuvezela ingane isimo kusengaphambili kungaba wusizo, njengokuvakashela ihhovisi likadokotela ngaphambi kokuhlolwa.

Ezinye izibhedlela zinabachwepheshe bempilo yezingane abangachaza izinqubo nezimo zezokwelapha ezinganeni zabo bonke ubudala. Uma ingane yakho ikhathazeke kakhulu futhi idinga ukunakekelwa okwandisiwe kwezokwelapha, cela umhlinzeki wakho mayelana nezinsizakalo ezinjalo.

Lapho kungenzeki ukuthi abazali babe nengane, njengokuhlinzwa, chaza okwenzekile enganeni. Qinisekisa ingane ukuthi umzali ulindile, futhi kuphi.

Ezinganeni ezindala ezingazange zikhulule ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana, ukwelashwa kungafaka:

• Imithi yokulwa nokukhathazeka
• Izinguquko kumasu obuzali
• Ukwelulekwa kwabazali nengane

Ukwelashwa kwamacala abucayi kungabandakanya:

• Imfundo yomndeni
• Ukwelashwa komndeni
• Ukwelashwa kokukhuluma

Izingane ezincane ezinezimpawu ezithuthukayo ngemuva kweminyaka yobudala ezi-2 zivamile, noma ngabe ukukhathazeka okuthile kubuya emuva kwesikhathi ngesikhathi sokucindezeleka. Lapho ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana kwenzeka ebusheni, kungakhombisa ukukhula kwesifo sokukhathazeka.

Shayela umhlinzeki wakho uma ingane yakho inokukhathazeka ngokwehlukana okukhulu ngemuva kweminyaka yobudala engu-2.

Iwebhusayithi yaseAmerican Academy of Pediatrics. Ungakuthambisa kanjani ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana kwengane yakho. www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/Pages/Soothing-Your-Childs-Separation-Anxiety.aspx. Kubuyekezwe ngoNovemba 21, 2015. Kufinyelelwe ngoJuni 12, 2020.

UCarter RG, Feigelman S. Unyaka wesibili. Ku: Kliegman RM, St Geme JW, Blum NJ, Shah SS, Tasker RC, Wilson KM, eds. Incwadi kaNelson Yezingane. Umhlaka 21. IPhiladelphia, PA: Elsevier; 2020: isahluko 23.

URosenberg DR, uChiriboga JA. Izinkinga zokukhathazeka. Ku: Kliegman RM, St Geme JW, Blum NJ, Shah SS, Tasker RC, Wilson KM, eds. Incwadi kaNelson Yezingane. Umhlaka 21. IPhiladelphia, PA: Elsevier; 2020: isahluko 38.