Ingabe Kufanele Ubhekane Nomngane Wakho Mayelana Nokuziphatha Kwabo Kwe-Shady Dating?

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Isizini yesikhombisa ye IBachelor ePharadesi idrama ayishodi, kanti nesiqephu saleli sonto siyafana.

Ukubuyisela emuva emuva ngokushesha: Isiqephu sangoLwesibili siveze izithandani zibeka ubuhlobo bazo ezingeni elilandelayo - ngubani ongakhohlwa i- "Grocery Store" uJoe Amabile noSerena Pitt abalahle igama elihle lika- "L" - kanti abanye, njengoNatasha Parker, bebengenayo inhlanhla. UParker, owavela okokuqala ngesizini kaPeter Weber ka IBachelor ngonyaka odlule, ngizame IPharadesi kuleli hlobo kwesinye isibhamu othandweni. Nakuba kubonakala sengathi uthole umdlalo ekuqaleni I-Bachelorette obengenele umncintiswano uBrendan Morais, wayenamehlo kaPieper James kuphela, a Isiqu i-alum efike ku- IPharadesi evikini eledlule.

Ngaphambi kwe IPharadesiNokho, kwase kuvele imibiko yokuthi uMorais noJames babeyinto. Ngesikhathi uParker ezwa la mahlebezi, wacela uMorais ukuthi acacise ngobudlelwano bakhe noJames, wathi laba bobabili babebambene iziqu ezimbalwa kuphela. Bobabili uMorais noJames babesolwa ngokuhlela ukuhlangana emabhishi ase IPharadesi, ngokuvumelana ne Us Weekly.

Esiqeshini sangoLwesibili, nokho, abasele IPharadesi ababengenele lo mqhudelwano bakubeke kwacaca ukuthi abajabulile ngendlela uMorais amphatha ngayo uParker futhi bamnxusa ukuthi ashiye ulwandle noJames, okuyinto - i-spoiler alert - abayenza. Futhi ngenkathi kubonakala uParker ezoba nethuba lokuhlangana nomuntu omusha - othandekayo I-Bachelorette i-alum Joe Park, M.D., aka "Dr. Joe" - uthando lwabo olusafufusa lushaye kancane njengoba uDkt Joe eyi-BFFs noMorais oyimpikiswano. Isibonelo, phakathi nedethi yokuqala ka-Parker no-Park, wawungabona ukushintsha kolimi lomzimba wakhe ngokushesha ngemva kokuba u-Parker elandisa ngokwehluleka kwakhe "ukushayisana" no-Morais. Ngemuva kokugcothula etafuleni ngezibuko ezinkulu ze-margarita, uDkt Joe usuka ekukhulumeni ngokuthi unethemba lokuthi uParker "ungumuntu" wakhe, washo ngokufihla ukuthi, "kuzoba yini." (Okuhlobene: I-Astrology Ithi 'Bachelorette' Katie Thurston kanye noBlake Moynes Bekumele Njalo)

Kuyaqondakala ukuthi uDkt Joe wamangala ukuzwa ukuthi yini eyehle phakathi kweMorais neParker. Eqinisweni, kungase kukuthuse ukubona umuntu omkhathalelayo evezwa ngokukhanya okungathandeki. "Brendan wami?" kubuza uDkt Joe ngesikhathi sesiqephu sangoLwesibili. Yebo, uDkt Joe, "uBrendan wakho" ubebangele ubuhlungu beParker. Kepha kulokhu, yini isinyathelo esilandelayo sikaDkt Joe: ingabe uyathembisa ukwethembeka kuMorais ngokunikezwa umlando wabo wobungani, noma uyaqhubeka nokuphishekela ukuthandana noParker futhi abambe icala lakhe?

Okokuqala, ake sikhulume ngokuziphendulela kobungani. Kunalo mqondo ngobungani (futhi kaningi ubudlelwano bebonke) ukuthi "uthande umuntu noma ngabe kunjani" kusho ukubheka ngale kwezinqumo ezingabaza abangazenza. Kepha kukhona enkulu umehluko phakathi kokuthi umuntu aziphendulele ngezenzo zakhe kanye nokuma nomuntu ngobumpumputhe ngoba ningabangani. Ukuba sebudlelwaneni kumayelana nokudala isikhala sothando nokwamukelana, ingasaphathwa eyesilinganiso esinempilo sokuziphendulela. Uma kwenzeka kuba IBachelor ePharadesiLokhu kusho ukuthi uDkt. Joe unethuba lokuthi uMorais aphendule ngokungabi khona ngokuphelele noParker. (Okuhlobene: Ungabhekana Kanjani Nezindawo Ezishintshayo Zobungani Bakho)

Kodwa Kanjani ingabe wenza umuntu aphendule? Nansi into: Ukuxabana kungase kuzizwe kungakhululekile futhi kungakhululeki. Kungase futhi kube nomuzwa wokuphoxeka kancane lapho ubhekene nomuntu omthandayo mayelana nokuthile okungenzeka ukuthi wonile. Noma kunjalo, isipiliyoni uqobo asidingi ukuba sibi. Ukuxabana, emgogodleni wayo, kumane kuyingxoxo. Kanjani wena khetha "ukubhekana" nomuntu angabeka ithoni, ngakho-ke thatha indlela enozwelo uma lokho kuzwakala kungcono.

Yize uDkt. Joe azisola uParker ngesikhathi besathandana, ethi "uyaxolisa kakhulu" wadlula kulolo bunzima obuzama noMorais, isimo phakathi Isiqu ama-bros kungenzeka aphathwe ngokuvuthiwe i-IRL. Empeleni, ingxoxo ingabonakala ngathi: "Hheyi, Brendan. Ngisanda kubuya osukwini lwami noNatasha futhi ngazizwa ngishaqekile ngokuthi usisingathe kanjani leso simo naye noPieper. Singakhuluma kabanzi ngalokho?"

Noma, njengoba ngobuchwepheshe uMorais wayengekho IPharadesi lapho usuku lwehla, uDkt. Joe wayengase athi kuParker: "Wow, lokho kuzwakala kunzima ngempela. Ngingathanda ukungaphinde ngikhulume ngakho futhi ngigxile kithi kuze kube yilapho ngikwazi ukuxoxa noBrenden. Ingabe kulungile?" Ukuzwelana okuncane kuhamba ibanga elide, futhi bekuzowenza umehluko ngesikhathi ukuxhumana kukaDkt Joe noParker ngosuku lwabo lokudla kwakusihlwa. (Okuhlobene: Amathiphu ama-6 Wokuphila Okunempilo - Nokungabi Nabuhlungu Kakhulu - Izimpikiswano Zobudlelwano)

Unga - futhi kufanele - uhlangane nabangane bakho ngomusa nangokuzimisela. Kule ngxoxo ecatshangelwayo phakathi kwabangane ababili, uDkt. Joe angase asho into efana nalena: "Ngiyakuthanda futhi ngiyakweseka, ndoda, kodwa angicabangi ukuthi usingathe lesi simo ngendlela engcono kakhulu. Ngiyakuhlonipha kanye nobungane bethu futhi ngifuna njalo. ukuthembeka kuwe mayelana nezinyathelo ezingezinhle ozithathayo. Kunjalo nangami! " Akudingeki ukuthi yeqe ngokweqile noma isolwe - ingaba ingxoxo ezolile nenenhlonipho. (Bheka: Kungani Izingxoxo Zingalungile nokuthi Ungazilungisa Kanjani)

Ubudlelwano bumapeketwane, futhi kwesinye isikhathi, ukungcola kuyingxenye yentelezi. Kodwa lokho kusho, abantu bangakhuthazwa ukuba baphendule abathandekayo babo. Ngokuziphendulela oseduze nawe nomthanda kakhulu, banethuba lokushintsha ukuziphatha kwabo kube ngcono, okungabasiza ekugcineni bathuthukise ubudlelwano babo. Nasi esinye isizathu sokuthi kungani: Uma i IBachelor ePharadesi izindima zabuyiselwa emuva, futhi ukube uDkt Joe wayezicathulweni zikaParker, kungenzeka ukuthi angafuna ukuthi umuntu athembeke futhi anake izindlela abezilimaze ngazo.

Ekupheleni kosuku, kungenzeka ukuthi uthande umngani wakho futhi ungabuyeli emuva ngamaphesenti ayi-100 ezenzo zabo. Umngane omuhle ngempela yilowo ongathembeka kuwe, akunjalo?

URachel Wright, MA, LM.FT, (yena) ungudokotela wezengqondo onelayisense, uthisha wezocansi kanye nochwepheshe wezobudlelwano ozinze eNew York City. Uyisikhulumi esinolwazi, umgqugquzeli weqembu, nomlobi. Usebenze nezinkulungwane zabantu emhlabeni wonke ukubasiza ukuthi baklabalase kancane futhi bajije ngaphezulu.

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