Yini i-Enabler? Izindlela Eziyi-11 Zokubona Eyodwa

-Delile

• Ukunika amandla kuqhathaniswa nokunika amandla
• Izimpawu noma izici zomhlinzeki
• 1. Ukuziba noma ukubekezelela ukuziphatha okunenkinga
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 2. Ukunikeza usizo lwezezimali
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 3. Ukubasibekela noma ukwenza izaba
• Izibonelo zalokhu kuziphatha
• 4. Ukwenza okungaphezu kwesabelo sakho semithwalo yemfanelo
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 5. Ukugwema inkinga
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 6. Ukuxubha izinto
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 7. Ukuphika inkinga
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 8. Ukuzidela noma ukulwela ukubona izidingo zakho
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 9. Ukungalandeli imiphumela
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 10. Ukungayigcini imingcele oyibekile
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• 11. Ukuzwa ukucasuka
• Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha
• Ungayeka kanjani ukunika amandla othandekayo
• Yiza nodaba
• Bakhuthaze ukuthi bathole usizo
• Setha imingcele yakho bese uyigcina
• Khumbula ukuthi kulungile ukuthi cha
• Zama ukwelashwa ngokwakho
• Gwema ukusebenzisa izinto ezibazungezile
• Ukudla okudlela endlini

Igama elithi "amandla" livame ukuchaza umuntu oziphatha ngendlela evumela othandekayo ukuthi aqhubeke nokuziphatha okulimazayo.

Leli gama lingahle licwase ngoba kuvame ukwahlulelwa okungekuhle kulo. Kodwa-ke, abantu abaningi abanika amandla abanye abenzi kanjalo ngamabomu. Kungenzeka bangaboni nokuthi benzani.

Ukunika amandla imvamisa kubhekisa emaphethini avela kumongo wokusebenzisa kabi izidakamizwa notshwala.Kepha ngokwe-American Psychological Association, ingabhekisa emaphethini asebudlelwaneni obusondelene asekela noma ikuphi ukuziphatha okuyingozi noma okuyinkinga nokwenza kube lula ukuthi lokho kuqhubeka kuqhubeke.

Ukunika amandla akusho ukuthi usekela ukulutha kothandekayo wakho noma enye indlela yokuziphatha. Ungakholelwa uma ungasizi, umphumela wawo wonke umuntu othintekayo uzoba mubi kakhulu. Mhlawumbe uthethelela ukuziphatha okukhathazayo, uboleke imali, noma usize ngezinye izindlela.

Kepha kubalulekile ukubona ukuthi ukunika amandla akusizi ngalutho. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kungaba nomthelela omubi kothandekayo wakho nakwabanye ababazungezile. Kunzima ngomuntu ukuthola usizo uma engayiboni ngokuphelele imiphumela yezenzo zakhe.

Uma ukhathazekile ungahle unike amandla ukusebenza kothile, funda ukuze ufunde kabanzi ngokunika amandla, kufaka phakathi izimpawu, ukuthi ungamisa kanjani, nokuthi unganikeza kanjani ukwesekwa kothandekayo wakho.

Ukunika amandla kuqhathaniswa nokunika amandla

Akulula ngaso sonke isikhathi ukuhlukanisa phakathi ukunika amandla umuntu futhi ukunika amandla kubo. Kungahle kube khona umehluko omncane phakathi kwalokhu okubili.

Abantu abaningi abanika amandla abathandekayo abahlose ukudala ukulimala. Eqinisweni, ukunika amandla ngokuvamile kuqala ngesifiso sokusiza. Ukunika amandla izindlela zokuziphatha kungahle kubonakale njengokuziphatha okusizayo. Ungazama ukusiza ngezinhloso ezinhle kakhulu futhi unike amandla othile ngaphandle kokuqaphela.

Kodwa ukunika umuntu amandla akusho ukuxazulula noma ukumboza izinkinga. Esikhundleni salokho, uma unika umuntu amandla, wenza okukodwa noma okuningi kokulandelayo ukuze umsize aphumelele noma azishintshe ngokwakhe:

• banikeze amathuluzi
• basize bathole izinsizakusebenza
• babafundise amakhono

Ngamanye amagama, ubanikeza amandla okwenza izinqumo zabo nokuxazulula izinkinga.

Ukunika amandla kuvame ukuchaza izimo ezibandakanya ukulutheka noma ukusetshenziswa kabi kwezidakamizwa. Kodwa lokhu akuhlali kunjalo. Ukunika amandla kungachaza noma isiphi isimo lapho "usiza" ngokuzama ukufihla izinkinga noma uzenze zihambe.

Lolu sizo ekugcineni alusizi, ngoba imvamisa alwenzi inkinga ihambe ngokuphelele. Imvamisa kuyenza ibe yimbi kakhulu njengoba umuntu onikwe amandla enesizathu esincane sokwenza ushintsho uma eqhubeka nokuthola usizo olwehlisa isidingo sokwenza ushintsho.

Izimpawu noma izici zomhlinzeki

Lezi zimpawu ezilandelayo zingakusiza ukuthi ubone lapho kungenzeka ukuthi iphethini yokuziphatha okuvumayo kungenzeka ukuthi yathuthuka.

1. Ukuziba noma ukubekezelela ukuziphatha okunenkinga

Ngisho noma wena uqobo ungavumelani nokuziphatha kothandekayo, ungakushaya indiva nganoma yiziphi izizathu.

Uma ukholwa ukuthi othandekayo wakho ufuna ukunakwa, ungahle ube nethemba lokuthi ukuziba isenzo kuzosusa isisusa sabo sokuqhubeka.

Ungakugwema ukukhuluma ngakho ngoba wesaba ukwamukela inkinga. Kungenzeka wena noma umuntu omthandayo anangemukeli kunenkinga. Ungase wesabe nokuthi ozothandwa uthini noma uzokwenzenjani uma uphonsela inselelo indlela oziphatha ngayo.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Ithi umlingani wakho ulwa nokusetshenziswa kabi kotshwala. Bathi bebengaphuzi, kodwa uthola irisidi kudoti wasendlini yangasese yesitolo sotshwala ngobusuku obubodwa. Ngobusuku obulandelayo uthola irisidi yebha endaweni yakini. Esikhundleni sokubabuza ngamarisidi, unquma ukungacindezeli inkinga.

2. Ukunikeza usizo lwezezimali

Ngokuvamile akukho okubi ekusizeni othandekayo ngokwezimali ngezikhathi ezithile uma izimali zakho siqu zikuvumela lokho. Kepha uma bejwayele ukusebenzisa imali budedengu, ngokuxhamazela, noma ezintweni ezingadala ingozi, ukubanikeza imali njalo kungavumela lokhu kuziphatha.

Ukusiza othandekayo ngokwezezimali kungaba nemiphumela elimazayo uma belwa nokulutha noma ukusebenzisa kabi utshwala.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Ingane yakho esikhulile ilwela ukuphatha imali yayo futhi ayinayo imali eyanele yokukhokha irenti yayo. Ukubasiza inyanga nenyanga ngeke kubafundise ukuphatha imali yabo. Esikhundleni salokho, bangancika kakhulu kuwe.

3. Ukubasibekela noma ukwenza izaba

Lapho ukhathazekile ngemiphumela yezenzo zomuntu omthandayo, kungokwemvelo ukufuna ukubasiza ngokuzivikela kuleyo miphumela.

Kuyizilingo ukwenza izaba zothandekayo wakho kwamanye amalungu omndeni noma abangane lapho ukhathazeka ukuthi abanye abantu bazobahlulela kanzima noma kabi. Kepha lokhu ngeke kusize othandekayo wakho aguquke.

Izibonelo zalokhu kuziphatha

Ungabiza umsebenzi womlingani wakho ukuthi uyagula uma belambile noma bedakiwe. Noma ungabiza isikole sengane yakho ngezaba lapho ingakaqedi iphrojekthi yethemu noma ifundele isivivinyo esibalulekile.

Izenzo zakho zingabonakala ngathi ziyasiza okwamanje: Zigcina umlingani wakho ekubhekaneni nokusolwa noma alahlekelwe ngumsebenzi (nomthombo wemali). Zivimbela ingane yakho ekutholeni imiphumela yokufunda engathinta ikusasa labo.

Kodwa izenzo zakho zinganikeza othandiweyo wakho umyalezo wokuthi akukho lutho olungalungile ngokuziphatha kwabo - ukuthi uzoqhubeka ubambathisa.

4. Ukwenza okungaphezu kwesabelo sakho semithwalo yemfanelo

Ungahle unike amandla othandekayo uma uzithola uvama ukuthatha ubudlabha babo: ukwenza imisebenzi yasendlini, ukunakekela izingane zabo, noma ukunakekela imisebenzi ebalulekile yansuku zonke abayishiya ingenziwanga.

Kunomehluko phakathi kokusekela umuntu nokumnika amandla. Umuntu olwa nokudangala angakuthola kunzima ukuvuka embhedeni usuku ngalunye. Ukwesekwa kwesikhashana kungabasiza badlule esikhathini esinzima futhi kubanike amandla okufuna usizo. Awukwazi ukunika amandla ukudangala ngoba akuyona indlela yokuziphatha.

Kepha uma usizo lwakho luvumela othandekayo wakho ukuthi abe nesikhathi esilula sokuqhubeka nendlela yokuziphatha enenkinga, ungahle ubanike amandla.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Ungavumela ingane yakho ukuthi igweme imisebenzi yasekhaya ukuze babe "nesikhathi sokuba ingane." Kodwa umuntu omdala osemncane ongazi ukuthi ungawasha kanjani izingubo noma awashe izitsha uzoba nesikhathi esinzima eyedwa. Kubalulekile ukushaya ibhalansi.

5. Ukugwema inkinga

Noma ngabe othandekayo wakho uyaqhubeka nokuphuza aze afike ebumnyameni noma ekhipha imali njalo esikhwameni sakho semali, umuzwa wakho wokuqala kungaba ukubhekana nabo. Ufuna ukuthi isimilo sime.

Kodwa ngemuva kokucabanga ngakho, ungaqala ukukhathazeka ngokuthi bazosabela kanjani. Ungahle unqume ukuthi kungcono nje ukungakunaki ukuziphatha noma ufihle imali yakho.

Imvamisa kuyethusa ukucabanga ngokuletha izingqinamba ezibucayi njengokulutha uma usubonile ukuthi kunenkinga. Lokhu kungaba yinselele ikakhulukazi uma vele uthambekele ekutholeni kunzima ukuphikisana noma izingxabano.

Kepha ukugwema izingxoxo kukuvimbela ekutheni unake inkinga futhi usize othandekayo wakho ukuba abhekane nayo ngendlela enempilo, enhle.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Othandekayo wakho uvame ukuphuza kakhulu lapho uphuma uya endaweni yokudlela. Esikhundleni sokukhuluma ngodaba, uqala ukuphakamisa izindawo ezingabunikeli utshwala.

6. Ukuxubha izinto

Abantu ababhekene nokulutha umlutha noma amanye amaphethini wokuziphatha okuyinkinga bavame ukusho noma benze izinto ezilimazayo noma ezihlukumezayo. Bangakuthuka, bakudelele, bakwephule noma bantshontshe izinto zakho, noma bakulimaze ngokomzimba.

Ungase uzitshele ukuthi lokhu kuziphatha akukubi kangako noma uzikholwe ukuthi bebengeke benze lezo zinto uma kungenjalo ukulutha.

Kepha isizathu sokuziphatha asinandaba. Uma isimilo sidala ukulimala, sidala ukulimala. Ukunciphisa lolu daba kusho kothandekayo wakho ukuthi angaqhubeka akuphathe ngokufanayo kungabi namiphumela.

Ngokwenza sengathi abakwenzayo akukuthinti, unikeza umlayezo ukuthi abenzi lutho oluyinkinga.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Umlingani wakho uhlala ekuhlekisa emphakathini. Ngoba nabo balwa nokulutha kotshwala, uzitshela ukuthi ukukhuluma ngotshwala kanti empeleni abakuqondile.

Noma iqala ukuthinta inhlalakahle yakho engokomzwelo, uze uzitshele ukuthi akukhona ukuhlukumeza ngoba akuzona uqobo lwazo uma kade ziphuza.

7. Ukuphika inkinga

Kungaba nzima ukuvuma othandekayo udinga usizo. Bangasho ukuthi bazame izidakamizwa kanye noma kabili kuphela kepha abazisebenzisi njalo. Bangase babuze nokuthi ngabe wena bacabanga ukuthi banenkinga. Uyabaqinisekisa ukuthi awukhathazekile, ukuthi abaphuzi kangako, noma ngenye indlela bayaphika ukuthi kunenkinga.

Ungakhetha ukubakholelwa noma uvume ngaphandle kokukholwa ngempela. Ungaze uphikelele komunye umndeni noma abangani ukuthi konke kuhamba kahle ngenkathi ulwela ukwamukela lolu hlobo lweqiniso ngokwakho.

Kepha ngokungayivumeli inkinga, ungayikhuthaza, noma ngabe ufuna ukuthi iyeke. Ukwenqaba le nkinga kungakudalela izinselele wena nothandekayo wakho.

Inihlukanisa nobabili, munye. Kwenza futhi kube nzima ngothandekayo wakho ukucela usizo, noma ngabe bazi ukuthi badinga usizo ukuze bashintshe.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Umlingani wakho uye waqala kancane ukuphuza kakhulu njengoba izingcindezi nezibopho emsebenzini wazo zikhuphukile. Uyakhumbula lapho bephuza kancane kakhulu, ngakho uzitshela ukuthi abanankinga. Bangakwazi ukuyeka noma nini.

8. Ukuzidela noma ukulwela ukubona izidingo zakho

Ukuphuthelwa yizinto ozifunayo noma ozidingayo ngoba uhileleke kakhulu ekunakekeleni othandekayo nakho kungaba uphawu lokuthi unika lowo muntu amandla.

Ingabe udonsa kanzima ngokwezezimali ngemuva kokunikeza omthandayo imali? Ingabe awunaso isikhathi somsebenzi wakho, sokuzinakekela, noma sobunye ubudlelwano njengoba wenza okuningi ekhaya?

Kwesinye isikhathi sifuna ukuzidela ngenxa yabantu esibakhathalelayo. Lokhu akusho ngaso sonke isikhathi ukuthi unika amandla othile. Isizathu sokuthi uvumele izidingo zakho zihambe izindaba ezingafinyelelwanga.

Ngokuqinisekile kubalulekile ukuzinakekela wena kuqala, ikakhulukazi lapho unakekela othandekayo ogulayo, kodwa kungenzeka ungakhathazeki ngokuphuthelwa eminye yemisebenzi yakho ejwayelekile izinsuku eziningana noma amasonto ambalwa.

Kepha uma uhlala ulwela ukwenza izinto noma uzizwa ukhathele yimizamo yakho yokunakekela othandekayo, kungasiza ukucabanga ngezizathu zakho zokusiza nomphumela abanawo kothandekayo wakho. Ngabe ukuzidela kwakho kuyakuvumela ukuziphatha kwabo kuqhubeke?

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Ingane yakho ichitha amahora ubusuku ngabunye idlala imidlalo yevidiyo esikhundleni sokunakekela izibopho zayo. Ugcwalisa kusihlwa ngokuwasha izingubo, ukuhlanza, neminye imisebenzi ukuqinisekisa ukuthi bazoba nokuthile abazokugqoka neshawa ehlanzekile abazoyisebenzisa ekuseni.

Kepha futhi usebenza isikhathi esigcwele futhi udinga kusihlwa ukuze uzinakekele. Uvumele lokhu kushelele eceleni kwendlela. Uyabona ukuthi kuyiqiniso nje lempilo.

9. Ukungalandeli imiphumela

Uma usho umphumela, kubalulekile ukulandela. Ukungalandeli lokhu kwenza othandiweyo wakho angazi ukuthi kuzokwenzekani lapho beqhubeka benza into efanayo. Lokhu kungenza ukuthi kube lula ukuthi bazoqhubeka nokuziphatha ngendlela efanayo futhi baqhubeke nokusebenzisa usizo lwakho.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Kungafika isikhathi ebudlelwaneni bakho lapho usenele. Ungase uthi, "Uma usebenzisa le mali kunoma yini enye ngaphandle kokuqasha, angisophinde ngikunike enye imali."

Noma, "Angikwazi ukuhlala kulobu budlelwano uma ungalutholi usizo lochwepheshe."

Ungase futhi uthi, "Ngikhokha kuphela ingxenye yami yerenti kule nyanga, ngakho-ke uma ungakwazi ukukhokha eyakho, kuzodingeka uthole enye indawo yokuhlala."

Kepha awulandeli, ngakho-ke othandekayo wakho uyaqhubeka nokwenza abakwenzayo futhi afunde ukuthi lezi yizinsongo ezingenalutho.

10. Ukungayigcini imingcele oyibekile

Imingcele enempilo ibalulekile kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo. Eminye imingcele ongayiveza othandekayo obhekene nokulutha, ukuhlukunyezwa, noma okunye ukukhathazeka kungafaka:

• "Angifuni ukuba seduze kwakho lapho umemeza, ngakho ngizolalela kuphela uma ukhuluma ngomoya ophansi."
• "Angizizwa ngikhululekile ukuya ocansini uma uphuzile."
• "Angifuni ukuhlanganyela lapho ubukade wenza izidakamizwa, ngakho-ke ngicela ungafiki lapho usuphakeme."

Uma wena noma othandekayo wakho weqa umngcele owuvezile futhi ayikho imiphumela, bangaqhubeka bewela lowo mkhawulo.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Uma othandekayo wakho eqala ukumemeza ngesikhathi sengxoxo bese uqhubeka nengxoxo esikhundleni sokuhamba, bangathola umyalezo wokuthi ukuziphatha okunenkinga akuyona into enkulu leyo kuwe. Bangase futhi babe nomuzwa wokuthi uzonikezela kalula kweminye imingcele, futhi.

11. Ukuzwa ukucasuka

Lapho iphethini yokunika amandla ibonakalisa ubudlelwano, kuvame kakhulu ukuthuthuka, noma imizwa yentukuthelo nokudumala.

Intukuthelo yakho ingabhekiswa kakhulu kothandekayo wakho, esimweni, kokubili, noma nakuwe uqobo. Ungazizwa ulimele futhi uthukuthele ngokuchitha isikhathi esiningi uzama ukusiza umuntu obonakala engakwazisi. Ungazizwa unesibopho sokuqhubeka nokusiza noma ungafuni.

Intukuthelo ingalimaza inhlalakahle yakho engokomzwelo, kodwa futhi ingakusiza ukuthi ubone ukuthi isimo singase singabi sempilweni.

Isibonelo salokhu kuziphatha

Ithi udadewenu uyaqhubeka nokushiya izingane zakhe kuwe lapho ephuma. Uthi unomsebenzi, kodwa uyazi ukuthi unamanga. Uyavuma ukugada ingane ngoba ufuna izingane ziphephe, kepha ukugcina kwakho izingane kuyenza ikwazi ukuqhubeka nokuphuma.

Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi uba nolaka futhi ucasuke kakhulu ngaye kanye nawe uqobo ngokungakwazi ukuthi cha. Le ntukuthelo ingena kancane kancane ekusebenzisaneni kwakho nezingane zakhe.

Ungayeka kanjani ukunika amandla othandekayo

Ngabe kukhona kulezi zibonakaliso ezingenhla ezibonakala zifana namaphethini akhule ebudlelwaneni bakho nomuntu omthandayo? Lezi ziphakamiso zingakusiza ufunde ukuthi ungamnika kanjani amandla omthandayo esikhundleni salokho.

Yiza nodaba

Kwenze kucace ukuthi uyazi ngokusetshenziswa kabi kwezidakamizwa noma okunye ukuziphatha esikhundleni sokuziba noma ukuxubha lezi zenzo. Nikeza ububele, kodwa kwenze kucace ukuthi lezo zimilo azilungile.

Ukubhekana nothandekayo wakho kungabasiza babone ukuthi awukusekeli ukuziphatha ngenkathi ubazisa futhi ukuthi uzimisele ukubasiza ukuthi basebenzele ushintsho.

Bakhuthaze ukuthi bathole usizo

Bangase bangavumi ukufaka ukwelashwa ngokushesha, ngakho-ke kungadingeka ukuthi ukhulume ngakho kaningana. Ukusebenza nodokotela wakho kungakusiza ukuthi uhlole izindlela ezinhle zokuletha ukwelashwa okulungele isimo sakho.

Setha imingcele yakho bese uyigcina

Tshela othandekayo wakho ukuthi ufuna ukuqhubeka ubasiza, kepha hhayi ngezindlela ezenza ukuthi baziphathe kahle. Isibonelo, ungahle unikeze abagibeli ukuya kuma-aphoyintimenti kodwa uthi cha ekunikezeni imali yegesi noma yini enye.

Khumbula ukuthi kulungile ukuthi cha

Lokhu kungaba nzima ekuqaleni, ikakhulukazi uma othandekayo wakho ekuthukuthelela. Kodwa ukusho cha ngokuvamile kubalulekile ukuze welulame. Hlala uzolile, kodwa qina. Yenza imiphumela yemingcele eyeqiwe icace.

Zama ukwelashwa ngokwakho

Abelaphi bavame ukusebenza nabantu abazithola benika amandla abathandekayo babo ukubasiza ukuthi babhekane nala maphethini futhi banikeze ukusekelwa ngezindlela ezilusizo nezilungile.

Gwema ukusebenzisa izinto ezibazungezile

Uma othandekayo wakho ebhekene nokusetshenziswa kabi kotshwala, ukususa utshwala ekhaya lakho kungasiza ukuthi kungafinyeleleki kalula. Ungase ungabi nankinga yokunciphisa iziphuzo zakho, kodwa cabanga ukuba nazo nomngane wakho esikhundleni.

Ukudla okudlela endlini

Ukunika amandla othile akusho ukuthi uyavumelana nokuziphatha kwakhe. Ungavele uzame ukusiza othandekayo wakho aphume ngoba ukhathazekile ngabo noma wesaba ukuthi izenzo zabo zingabalimaza, wena, noma amanye amalungu omndeni.

Kepha kubalulekile ukubona le ndlela yokuziphatha bese uqala ukubhekana nayo. Ukunika amandla kungaba nemiphumela emibi ebudlelwaneni bakho namathuba wokululama kothandekayo wakho.

Kunzima ukusebenza ngokulutha noma ukusebenzisa kabi utshwala wedwa. Futhi uma inkinga ingakaze ixoxwe, kungenzeka babe mancane amathuba okuba bathole usizo.

Uma ucabanga ukuthi izenzo zakho zingavumela othandekayo wakho, cabanga ukukhuluma nodokotela. Ekwelashweni, ungaqala ukukhomba isimilo esivumayo futhi uthole ukwesekwa njengoba ufunda ukusiza othandekayo wakho ngezindlela ezinempilo.