Ingabe Kufanele Ube Ngumngane Ne-Ex Yakho?

-Delile

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Mhlawumbe ibanga elide alisebenzanga ngendlela obuthemba ngayo. Noma mhlawumbe uvele wahlukana ngokwemvelo. Uma singekho isigameko esibi esiholele ekutheni nobabili nihlukane, ningalingeka kakhulu ukuthi nihlale nithintana, a la Idina Menzel futhi Taye Diggs, abathi bahlela ukuhlala besondele ngemuva kokuhlukanisa.

Kepha naphezu kwezinhloso ezinhle, ochwepheshe baxwayisa ngokuthi lokho kungahle kungabi umqondo omuhle. "Ngisho nasezimweni lapho isinqumo sokwehlukana bekungokuvumelana, umuntu oyedwa uzohlala enemizwa enamandla kunomunye," kuxwayisa uLisa Thomas, udokotela wezobudlelwano endaweni yaseDenver. "Ukubonana kodwa ukungabi ndawonye kungaletha imizwa eminingi kakhulu kanti omunye angagcina elimele."

Lokho akusho ukuthi kufanele umenze abe yiqhwa ngokuphelele angabe esaba khona. Lapha, ungayiphatha kanjani i-ex yakho lapho kwenzeka lezi zimo ezintathu ezivamile "ezinobungane". [Twitha lesi seluleko!]

Ukungenela Kweqembu

Uma wena naye ninemibuthano yokuxhumana edlulanayo, ukumgwema kulula ukukusho kunokukwenza. Ukuba nohlelo endaweni-umngani ongangenela noma uhlu oluhleliwe lwezihloko ongeke uxoxe ngazo-kubalulekile, ikakhulukazi kulezo zinyanga ezimbalwa zokuqala, kusho uThomas. "Ukwazi ukuthi yini ozoyenza kusengaphambili kuyenza inciphise imizwa yakho, futhi uzobuyela emuva ngenxa yezikhathi zakudala amasiko."

Isimemo se-Hangout

Ngenkathi kulinga ukushaya le ndawo yokudlela yamaNdiya eniyithandayo nobabili, zibuze ukuthi kusihlwa kuzokuzuzisa kanjani-ikakhulukazi uma ubhekene ne-ex yakamuva. Uma ufuna ukubuyelana, noma ufuna ukusika izinto kahle ngesizotha, kulungile kuwe ukumazisa, kusho uThomas. “Kodwa uma uchitha isikhathi esiningi uzihlalela nowawushade naye, ulahlekelwa ngamathuba okukhula, ingasaphathwa eyokuzivalela kwamanye amathuba okuqomisana,” kukhumbuza uThomas. Uma engowesikhathi esidlule sasendulo, ukubamba isikhashana kupholile-vele ungene ngaphandle kokulindela.

Ukuxhunyaniswa Kwengozi

Ukuthi ubuchopho bakho buqonda ukuthi kungani ukwehlukana kwakudingeka akusho ukuthi umzimba wakho uzolandela ngokuzenzakalela, uxwayisa uKaren Ruskin, umbhali Incwadi Yomshado kaDkt. Karen. Noma ukulala ndawonye kungashintshi ukuthi omunye wenu uzizwa kanjani ngokwahlukana, kungokwemvelo ukuqagela kwesibili noma ukungabaza izinto, ikakhulukazi uma ubusuku bebumuhle, usho kanjalo. Kungakho kufanele ulandele noma yikuphi ukubuyisana okunjengalesi nesikhathi esipholile ukuthola ukuthi kungani kwenzeke lokho. Ingabe kungenxa yokuthi nobabili nisanda kuba sendaweni eyodwa? Ingabe bekungenxa yokuthi nobabili nifuna ithuba lesibili ebudlelwaneni? Noma ngabe yisiphi isinqumo, qiniseka ukuthi uxoxa ngaso emini, ngenkathi izingubo zigqokile, kusho uRuskin.

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