Kuyini Ukudluliselwa?

-Delile

• Kuyini ukuphikisana?
• Kwehluke kanjani ekubonisweni?
• Ukudluliselwa kusetshenziswa kanjani ekwelashweni?
• Ukwelashwa kwengqondo okugxilwe ekudlulisweni
• Ukwelashwa kwengqondo okunamandla
• Ukwelashwa kokuziphatha kwengqondo (CBT)
• Yimiphi imizwa ehilelekile ekudlulisweni?
• Yini ukwelashwa kokudluliswa?
• Ukudla okudlela endlini

Ukudluliswa kwenzeka lapho umuntu eqondisa kabusha eminye yemizwa yabo noma izifiso zomunye umuntu kumuntu ohluke ngokuphelele.

Isibonelo esisodwa sokudluliswa kulapho ubona izici zikababa wakho kumphathi omusha. Ubeka imizwa kababa kulo mphathi omusha. Kungaba yimizwa emihle noma emibi.

Njengesinye isibonelo, ungahlangana nomakhelwane omusha bese ubona ngokushesha ukufana komzimba kowakwakho wangaphambili. Ube usuthi izindlela zokwenza kwakho kwakudala kulo muntu omusha.

Ukudluliswa kungenzeka noma ngabe kukhona umehluko owehlukile. Imvamisa kukwenza ubukeke ukwedlula lokhu kungafani kokufana.

Ukudluliselwa kungenzeka futhi esimweni sokunakekelwa kwezempilo. Isibonelo, ukudluliselwa ekwelashweni kwenzeka lapho isiguli sifaka intukuthelo, ubutha, uthando, ukukhuleka, noma eminye imizwa eminingi kumelaphi noma kudokotela wabo. Abelaphi bayazi ukuthi lokhu kungenzeka. Bazama ngenkuthalo ukuyiqapha.

Kwesinye isikhathi, njengengxenye yenqubo yabo yokwelashwa, abanye abelaphi bayakukhuthaza ngenkuthalo. Njengengxenye yokuhlolwa kwengqondo, abelaphi bazama ukuqonda izinqubo zengqondo zomuntu ezingazi lutho. Lokhu kungabasiza baqonde izenzo zalesi siguli, isimilo, nemizwa.

Isibonelo, umelaphi angabona ukusabela okungazi lutho ekusondeleni ekuguleni kwesiguli sabo ukwakha izibopho eziqinile nabanye ababalulekile. Ukudluliswa kungasiza owelapha ukuthi aqonde ukuthi kungani lokho kwesaba ukusondelana kukhona. Ngemuva kwalokho bangasebenzela ekuyixazululeni. Lokhu kungasiza isiguli ukuthi sakhe ubudlelwano obunempilo, obuhlala isikhathi eside.

Kuyini ukuphikisana?

Ukuphikisana kwenzeka lapho udokotela eqondisa kabusha imizwa yabo noma izifiso zabo ezigulini zabo. Lokhu kungaba ukusabela ekudlulisweni kwesiguli. Kungenzeka futhi ngaphandle kokuziphatha okuvela esigulini.

Abelaphi baqondiswa ngamakhodi wobuchwepheshe aqinile. Ngakho-ke, basebenzela ukusungula imigqa ecacile yokuhlukana phakathi kwabo njengomhlinzeki wezokunakekelwa kwezempilo kanye nawe njengesiguli.

Isibonelo, umelaphi akakwazi ukuba umngani wakho ngaphandle kwesethingi yokwelashwa. Badinga ukugcina ibanga lobuchwepheshe.

Kodwa-ke, isikhala esiphakathi kokwelapha kanye nesiguli singaba yinto emnyama. Ukudluliswa kungasicinanisa isimo, futhi. Abanye ochwepheshe bayalwa nalezi zinkinga kwezinye izindawo ekusebenzeni kwabo.

Abelaphi bangazama ukuvimbela noma ukuthuthukisa ukuphikiswa kokuphikisana. Bangaphendukela kozakwabo futhi bathole ukwelashwa ngokwabo.

Abelaphi bangaphinde bancome iziguli kozakwabo ukunciphisa isimo futhi banikeze ukunakekelwa okungcono kakhulu kwesiguli.

Kwehluke kanjani ekubonisweni?

Ukuqagela nokudluliswa kufana kakhulu. Kokubili kuhilela ukufaka imizwa noma imizwa kumuntu ongenayo empeleni. Umehluko phakathi kwalokhu kulapho kuvela khona ukunganikezwa okungafanele.

Ukuqagela kwenzeka lapho usho ukuthi ukuziphatha noma ukuzwa onakho ngomuntu okukukho. Ngemuva kwalokho, ungaqala ukubona "ubufakazi" baleyo mizwa obuvezwa kuwe.

Isibonelo, ukuqagela kwenzeka lapho ubona ukuthi awumthandi kakhulu umuntu osebenza naye omusha ama-cubic amabili ngaphezulu. Awuqinisekile ukuthi kungani, kodwa uthola lowo muzwa. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, uqala ukuzikholisa ukuthi bakhombisa izimpawu zokungakuthandi. Ukuziphatha komuntu ngamunye kusebenza "njengobufakazi" benkolelo yakho.

Imizwa ebaluliwe ingahle ibe mibili (uthando, ukukhuleka, ukukhonza) noma okubi (ubutha, ulaka, umona). Zingakhula futhi njengoba imizwa yakho ngomuntu ikhula.

Ukudluliselwa kusetshenziswa kanjani ekwelashweni?

Ukudluliselwa ekwelashweni kungahle kungahlosiwe. Isiguli siqondisa kabusha imizwa ngomzali, ingane yakini, noma owakwakhe kumelaphi.

Kungabuye kube ngamabomu noma ngokucasulwa. Umelaphi wakho angasebenza nawe ngenkuthalo ukuthola le mizwa noma izingxabano. Ngale ndlela bangabona kangcono futhi babaqonde.

Kuzo zonke izimo, umelaphi kufanele enze isiguli sazi ukuthi ukudluliswa kwenzeka nini. Ngale ndlela ungaqonda ukuthi uzizwa kanjani.

Ukudluliswa okungakhulunywanga kungaba yinkinga esigulini. Kungabavimba ngisho nokuthi babuye bezolashwa. Lokhu kuyaphikisana.

Nazi ezinye zezimo umelaphi angasebenzisa ngenhloso ukudluliswa:

Ukwelashwa kwengqondo okugxilwe ekudlulisweni

Ebudlelwaneni obusungulwe kahle bezokwelapha, isiguli nodokotela bangakhetha ukusebenzisa ukudluliselwa njengethuluzi lokwelapha.

Umelaphi wakho angakusiza ukudlulisa imicabango noma imizwa ngomuntu kubo. Lapho-ke umelaphi wakho angasebenzisa lokho kuxhumana ukuqonda kangcono imicabango nemizwa yakho.

Ngokubambisana, ningahlakulela ukwelashwa okungcono noma izinguquko zokuziphatha.

Ukwelashwa kwengqondo okunamandla

Ngokuvamile lokhu kuyindlela yesikhashana yokwelashwa kwengqondo. Kuncike emandleni omelaphi wokuchaza ngokushesha nokuqhamuka kwezinkinga zesiguli.

Uma lezi zinkinga zibandakanya imizwa noma imicabango ngomunye umuntu, umelaphi angazama ngenhloso ukucasula isiguli sakhe ngalolo lwazi.

Lolu hlobo lokudluliswa lungasiza umelaphi ukuthi athuthukise ukuqonda ngokushesha futhi aqale ukwelashwa.

Ukwelashwa kokuziphatha kwengqondo (CBT)

Uma uvulekele ukuqonda ukuthi okwedlule kwakha kanjani izinkinga zakho zamanje, umelaphi wakho ngisebenzisa i-CBT.

I-CBT ekugcineni ikufundisa ukuthi uqonde izindlela zakho zokuziphatha ezindala ukuze uphinde wenze okusha, okunempilo. Le nqubo ingaletha izingqinamba ezingokomzwelo ezihlala zibuhlungu.

Ukudluliselwa kulesi simo kungenzeka lapho isiguli sithola kumelaphi umthombo wenduduzo noma ubutha obukhulisa eminye yaleyo mizwa.

Yimiphi imizwa ehilelekile ekudlulisweni?

Ukudluliselwa kuhilela imizwa ehlukahlukene. Zonke zivumelekile.

Imizwa emibi yokudluliswa ifaka:

• intukuthelo
• ukudumala
• ukukhungatheka
• inzondo
• uvalo
• ukukhungatheka

Imizwa emihle yokudluliswa ifaka phakathi:

• ukulalelisisa
• ukucabanga
• uthando
• uthando
• okunamathiselwe

Yini ukwelashwa kokudluliswa?

Ezimweni lapho umelaphi esebenzisa ukudluliswa njengengxenye yenqubo yokwelashwa, ukuqhubeka nokwelashwa kuzosiza "ukwelapha" ukudluliswa. Umelaphi angasebenza nawe ukuqeda ukuhlelwa kabusha kwemizwa nemizwa. Uzosebenza ukunikeza kahle leyo mizwa.

Uma kwenzeka ukudluliswa kulimaza ikhono lakho lokukhuluma nodokotela wakho, kungadingeka ukuthi ubone umelaphi omusha.

Inhloso yokwelashwa ukuthi uzizwe ukhululekile ukuvuleka nokuba nengxoxo ethembekile nesazi sempilo yengqondo. Uma ukudluliselwa kumi endleleni yalowo mkhuba, ukwelashwa ngeke kusebenze.

Ungase ucabange ukubona umelaphi wesibili mayelana nokudluliswa. Lapho uzizwa ukuthi isixazululiwe, ungabuyela kudokotela wakho wokuqala bese uqhubeka nomsebenzi owawukwenza ngaphambi kokuba ukudluliswa kube yinkinga.

Ukudla okudlela endlini

Ukudluliselwa yinto eyenzeka lapho abantu beqondisa kabusha imizwa noma imizwa ngomuntu oyedwa iye kumuntu ohluke ngokuphelele. Lokhu kungenzeka empilweni yansuku zonke. Kungenzeka futhi nasendaweni yokwelashwa.

Abelaphi bangasebenzisa ngenhloso ukudlulisa ukuze baqonde kangcono umbono wakho noma izinkinga zakho. Kungabuye kungahlosiwe. Ungasho imizwa emibi noma emihle kumelaphi wakho ngenxa yokufana okubonayo kumelaphi wakho nakomunye umuntu empilweni yakho.

Ukwelashwa kungenzeka kuzo zombili izimo. Ukubhekana kahle nokudluliswa kungasiza wena nodokotela wakho ukuphinde nithole ubudlelwano obunempilo, nobukhiqizayo obuzuzisa wena ekugcineni.