Lapho Uhlala Esihlalweni Sabakhubazekile, Ukuzizwa Uheha Kungaba nzima - Nasi isizathu

-Delile

• Indlela entsha yokubona izinto
• Umqondo ovuselelwe wobuyena
• Ukudla okudlela endlini

Ukuzizwa ukhanga lapho unokukhubazeka kungaba yinselele, kuchaza isishoshovu u-Annie Elainey, ikakhulukazi lapho usebenzisa izinsiza zokuhamba.

Okokuqala kwakuyinduku. Ngenkathi kwakungukulungiswa, wezwa ukuthi unokumelwa okuhle angabheka kukho. Ngemuva kwakho konke, kunenqwaba yabalingiswa abanezindwani emithonjeni yezindaba ababonakala bekhanga, njengoDkt House kusuka "eNdlini" - futhi izinduku zivame ukuboniswa ngendlela esefashinini, e-dapper.

“Ngizwe kahle. Ngazizwa, ngokweqiniso, sengathi kunginikeza u-'oomph 'omncane, ”ekhumbula ehleka.

Kepha lapho u-Annie eqala ukusebenzisa isihlalo sabakhubazekile, kwakunzima kakhulu ukuzizwa usemfashinini noma ekhanga.

Ezingeni lomzwelo, kubantu abanezimo eziqhubekayo, ukulahleka kwamakhono athile kungaholela esikhathini sokulila. U-Annie uthi kumayelana nokulila into ebiyigugu kakhulu kuwe.Uthi: “Amakhono ethu avame ukuba yigugu kakhulu kithi - ngisho noma siwathatha kancane.

Indlela entsha yokubona izinto

Ekuqaleni, u-Annie wayekhathazekile ngokuthi ubukeka kanjani esihlalweni sakhe esisha esinamasondo. Futhi ubengakulungele ukushintsha ukuphakama, obekushaqisa. Ukuma, ulinganise izinyawo eziyi-5 amayintshi ayi-8 - kepha uhleli, ubemfishane unyawo lonke.

Njengomuntu ojwayele ukuba mude, bekuzwakala kungajwayelekile ukuhlala ubheka abanye phezulu. Futhi ezikhathini zomphakathi, abantu babembheka ngapha nangapha, kunokuba bambheke.

Kwamcacela u-Annie ukuthi indlela ayezibheka ngayo yehluke kakhulu kunendlela abanye ababembona ngayo. Ngenkathi ezibona njengomuntu onamandla ophumela emhlabeni, abaningi bavele babona isihlalo sakhe esinamasondo.

“Kwakunabantu ababengeke bheka kimi. Babebheka umuntu owayengifuqa, kodwa babengabheki mina. Futhi ukuzethemba kwami ​​kuthathe kanzima. ”

U-Annie wabhekana nokuphazamiseka komzimba futhi waqala ukuba nemicabango engemihle enjengokuthi: “Hawu, bengicabanga ukuthi bengimubi phambilini. Kungumdlalo impela manje. Akekho umuntu oyoze angithande manje. ”

Wayengazizwa "emuhle" noma efiseleka, kodwa wayezimisele ukungakuvumeli kuthathe impilo yakhe.

Umqondo ovuselelwe wobuyena

U-Annie waqala ukusesha ku-inthanethi futhi wathola umphakathi wabanye abantu abakhubazekile ababelana ngezithombe zabo nama-hashtag afana nama #spoonies, #hospitalglam, #cripplepunk, noma #cpunk (kubantu abangafuni ukusebenzisa i-slur).

Izithombe, uthi, bezimayelana nokubuyisa igama elithi "ukukhubazeka," ngabantu abakhubazekile abaziqhenyayo ngokukhubazeka futhi beziveza ngesizotha. Kwakunikeza amandla futhi kwasiza u-Annie ukuthola izwi lakhe nobuyena futhi, ngakho-ke wayezibona edlula indlela abanye ababona ngayo isihlalo sakhe.

“Bengithi: Hawu, ndoda, abantu abakhubazekile bahle njengoba heck. Futhi uma bekwazi ukukwenza, ngingakwenza. Hamba ntombazane, hamba! Gqoka ezinye zalezo zingubo obukade uzigqoka ngaphambi kokukhubazeka! ”

U-Annie uthi ngezinye izindlela, ukukhubazeka nokugula okungamahlalakhona kungaba isihlungi esihle. Uma othile ekubona ngokukhubazeka kwakho kuphela futhi engakwazi ukukubona ukuthi ungubani - uma engaboni ubuntu bakho - mhlawumbe awufuni lutho oluzokwenza nabo ozoqala ngalo.

Ukudla okudlela endlini

U-Annie useqalile ukubheka izinsiza zakhe zokuhamba “njengezinsiza” - njengesikhwama semali noma ibhantshi noma isikhafu - nakho okwenzeka ukuthuthukisa impilo yakhe.

Lapho u-Annie ezibuka esibukweni manje, uzithanda njengoba enjalo. Unethemba lokuthi ngokubonakala okwandayo, abanye bangaqala ukuzibona ngokukhanya okufanayo.

“Angizizwa ngikhanga ngoba abantu bayakhangwa kimi. Nginesiqiniseko sokuthi kunabantu abakhangwa yimi. Empeleni, ngineqiniso elingamaphesenti ayikhulu ukuthi kunabantu abakhangwa yimi ngoba angikaze ngihambe ngingenazo iziphakamiso nabasukelayo… Okubalulekile ukuthi ngiphinde ngathola ubunikazi bami. Ukuthi uma ngizibuka esibukweni, ngiyabona mina. Futhi ngiyathanda mina.”

U-Alaina Leary ungumhleli, umphathi wezokuxhumana nomlobi waseBoston, eMassachusetts. Njengamanje ungumsizi womhleli we-Equally Wed Magazine nomhleli wezokuxhumana wenhlangano engenzi nzuzo Sidinga Amabhuku Ahlukahlukene.