Izinzuzo Zezempilo Zokuthola Ithemba Ngokulindela Ukungabi Nalo Ithemba

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Iningi labantu liwela kwelinye lamakamu amabili: i-Pollyannas yenjabulo yaphakade, noma ama-Nancys angalungile avame ukulindela okubi kakhulu. Kuyavela ukuthi lowo mbono ungathinta okungaphezu nje kokuthi abanye abantu bahlobana kanjani nawe-kungaba nomthelela empilweni yakho: Abantu abanethemba elikhulu kunamathuba aphindwe kabili okuba nempilo enhle yenhliziyo uma kuqhathaniswa nozakwabo abangenathemba, ngokusho kocwaningo olusha ku iphephabhuku Ukuziphatha Kwezempilo Nokubuyekezwa Kwenqubomgomo. Ucwaningo lubheke abantu abadala abayi-5 000 lwathola nokuthi abanethemba lokuhle banamathuba amaningi okuthi badle ukudla okunempilo, babe nenkomba yomzimba enempilo, bangabhemi, futhi bazivocavoce njalo kunabalingani babo abangenathemba. Babenomfutho wegazi onempilo, ushukela wegazi, kanye namazinga e-cholesterol esewonke.

Ucwaningo lwangaphambilini lukhombisa nokuthi iziguli ezinomdlavuza ezinezimo ezinhle zivame ukuba nemiphumela engcono, abanethemba lokuhle banobudlelwano obenelisa kakhulu, futhi labo ababheka ohlangothini olukhanyayo mancane amathuba okuthi bagule ngumkhuhlane noma umkhuhlane kunoDebbie Downers.

Ngakho-ke ingabe akunathemba kwabangenathemba? Hhayi impela lapho kukhona izinzuzo zezempilo ezivela ekubukeni okungaphansi kokunethezeka. Nakhu ukuthi isimo sakho sengqondo singayithinta kanjani impilo yakho, nokuthi yini ongayenza ukukhulisa umbono wakho.

Izinzuzo Ze-Pessimism

Kukhona okumele kushiwo uma unombono ongekho kangako wePollyannaish womhlaba. Ucwaningo olwenziwe izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo eWellesley College lukhombisa ukuthi ukungabi nathemba kungasihlomisela kangcono ukubhekana nokucindezeleka. Ukusebenzisa lokho abakubiza ngokuthi "i-defensive pessimism" -ukusetha okulindelekile okuphansi kwesenzakalo esikhathazayo, njengokunikeza isethulo-kungakusiza uzizwe ungaqinile kangako. Isizathu? Uzivumela ukuthi ucabange ngazo zonke izingibe ezingaba khona ukuze uzilungiselele kangcono ukuze uzigweme ubhekane nokubanjwa ungaqaphile uma kukhona okungahambi kahle.

Futhi abantu abangenathemba cishe bangamaphesenti ayishumi amathuba okuthi babe nempilo engcono esikhathini esizayo esiseduze kunababenethemba lokuhle, ngokusho kocwaningo lwaseJalimane. Abaphenyi bathi abaphelelwa ithemba bangase babe namathuba amaningi okucabanga ngalokho okungase kungahambi kahle ekusaseni labo futhi bazilungiselele kangcono noma bathathe izinyathelo zokuzivikela, kanti abanethemba lokuhle kungenzeka bangawanaki lawo mathuba kangako. (Futhi: Amandla Okucabanga Okubi: Izizathu ezi-5 zokuthi kungani i-Positivity ikuthola kungalungile.)

I-Prime Optists '

Ngakho-ke ngubani ekugcineni onqenqemeni? Labo abakwaziyo ukubona ulayini olusiliva kungenzeka baphakamise umlenze, kusho u-Rosalba Hernandez, Ph.D., usonhlalakahle eNyuvesi yase-Illinois kanye nombhali wocwaningo lwakamuva oluxhumanisa ithemba nempilo yenhliziyo. “Abantu abajabule kakhulu ngempilo yabo maningi amathuba okuthi benze izinto ezizuzisa impilo yabo njengokudla kahle, ukuzivocavoca nokugcina isisindo esinempilo, ngoba maningi amathuba okuthi bakholelwe ukuthi izinto ezinhle zizovela kulezo zenzo,” uthi. Abathemba ithemba, nokho, bangase bangaliboni iphuzu uma bekholelwa ukuthi izinto zizogcina zimbi.

Futhi, nakuba kunokuthile okufanele kushiwo ngokungabi nathemba kokuzivikela, lokho akusho ukuthi abantu abanethemba lokuhle bahamba ngokungaboni bangene ezimeni ezesabekayo. "Uma kukhona okungahambi kahle, abanethemba lokuhle banamakhono angcono okubhekana nezimo zempilo ezicindezelayo," kusho uHernandez. "Bavame ukukholelwa ukuthi uma kuvalwa omunye umnyango, okuyisidambiso ekulweni nengcindezi. Abathembele phansi, noma kunjalo, kungenzeka babe nengozi enkulu, ngakho-ke uma kwenzeka okuthile okubi kungaholela ekugqekeni kokunganaki." Lokhu-ke nakho kungayilimaza impilo yabo iyonke, ngoba ingcindezi nokungabi nathemba kuhlotshaniswa nokudangala.

Hlakulela I-Outlook Ejabulisayo

Ngenhlanhla, uHernandez uthi kungenzeka ukuthi noma ngubani akhanyise isimo sakhe. (Kungani Ubona Ingilazi Njengengxenye Egcwele? Impendulo Ingase Ibe Kufuzo Lwakho.) Eqinisweni, abacwaningi bathi cishe amaphesenti angu-40 empilo yethu avela ekuziphatheni esihileleka kukho—ngakho-ke esingakulawula, uyanezela. Lezi zindlela ezintathu zingakusiza ukuthi ukhulise umbono ojabulayo futhi onempilo. (Futhi zama lezi Zindlela ezingama-20 Zokujabula (Cishe) Ngokushesha!)

1. Bhala amanye amanothi okubonga (noma ama-imeyili). "Ukubhala izincwadi zokubonga kukusiza ukuthi ugxile kokuhle nasezibusisweni onazo empilweni yakho," kusho uHernandez. "Kwesinye isikhathi abantu bagxila kulokho abanye abanakho futhi abangenakho, okudala ingcindezi nokungajabuli. Ukubonga kukusiza ukuthi ubone okuhle ngisho naphakathi kwezimo ezicindezelayo."

2. Chitha isikhathi esiningi wenza izinto ozithandayo. "Uma wenza into oyithandayo, ufaka isimo sokuhamba lapho isikhathi sidlula ngokushesha futhi konke okunye kuncibilika," kusho uHernandez.Lokhu, futhi, kukusiza uzizwe ujabulile ngokwengeziwe, okwenza ube sethubeni lokubona okuhle kuwe nasemhlabeni.

3. Yabelana ngezindaba ezinhle nabanye. Ingabe uthole impendulo enhle evela kumphathi wakho? Uthole i-latte yamahhala? Ungayigcini kuwe. "Noma nini lapho wabelana ngento enhle nomunye umuntu uyayikhulisa futhi akwenze uphinde uyikhumbule," kusho uHernandez. Ngakho-ke uma izinto ezimbi zenzeka, ukwabelana ngezinto ezinhle nabanye kwenza kube lula kuwe ukuthi ukhumbule leyo micimbi ukuze mancane amathuba okuba uwele embotsheni onogwaja yokungabi nandaba.

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