Indlela Yokuqeda Ukuhlukana, Indlela yamaBuddha

-Delile

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Ubuhlungu benhliziyo yinto edabukisayo engashiya noma ubani eqonda ukuthi yini engahambanga kahle-futhi ngokuvamile lokhu kusesha izimpendulo kuholela ekhasini le-Facebook lalowo owayeshade naye noma phansi kwebhodlela le-pinot noir. Ukushisekela ukuphuza noma ukufinyelela kulowo okuzwise ubuhlungu kuyaqondakala, kepha kuyaqabukela kukhiqize. Ngakho-ke, iyiphi indlela engcono yokuthola ukuthi ungakunqoba kanjani ukwahlukana?

Lowo ngumbuzo esiwubuze ku-Lodro Rinzler, uthisha we-Buddhist ozinze eNew York City nombhali wencwadi entsha. Uthando luyalimaza, igayidi yesayizi yephakethe yokwelapha ebuhlungwini benhliziyo, egqugquzelwe ngokwengxenye ulwazi lwakhe mayelana nokuthembisana okuphukile, ukushona komngane wakhe omkhulu, nokulahlekelwa umsebenzi wakhe ngokulandelana okusheshayo. Lapho ebhala lo mqulu, wayezihlalele yedwa nabantu abaningi baseNew York abamtshela izindaba zabo zothando nokudumazeka, futhi izimpendulo zazibanzi futhi zisuka enhliziyweni.

"Kwakuthakazelisa kakhulu ukubona i-saga egcwele ukuthi ubuhlungu benhliziyo bubukeka buhluke kakhulu kumuntu nomuntu, futhi ubuhlobo obunye bunobunye babo obuhlukile, kodwa imizwa engaphansi lapho ngokuvamile inomuzwa ofanayo wokukhashelwa, ukuthukuthela, ukuzizwa udangele, ngizizwa ngathi awusoze wathanda futhi, noma kungaba yini - ukuthi sonke sihlangabezane nalezi zinto ezindaweni ezihlukene noma ngabe sibuhlungu benhliziyo noma ngenye indlela, "kusho uRinzler.

Esebenzisa lezi zihloko, kanye nokufunda kwakhe isiko lokuhlakanipha leminyaka engu-2,500 XNUMX lobuBuddha, u-Rinzler unikeza imininingwane ehlolwe isikhathi nezeluleko ukuze asize ngenqubo yokwelapha yobuhlungu benhliziyo. Ngokuzayo lapho uzithola usemphumeleni wokuhlukana okubi, landela izinyathelo ezine ezichazwe ngezansi ukukusiza uzizwe ungcono ngokushesha kunalokho ongavula lelo bhodlela lewayini.

1. Zijwayeze Ukuzinakekela

Ku Uthando Buhlungus, URinzler ubhekisela kusethi eyimfihlo yezimfundiso eyaziwa ngokuthi i-Four Exhilarations, eyayifihliwe ezindlini zezindela ezijulile eTibet amakhulu eminyaka. Kuthiwa uma wenza konke lokhu okune ngosuku olulodwa uzozizwa ukhuphuka futhi ube namandla amasha. Kwenzeka lokhu nje ukuthi le mikhuba ibuye ihambisane nezeluleko zokuphila kahle ongazithola kumqeqeshi wezempilo, umqeqeshi, noma isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo, futhi yizinto okungenzeka ungazinaki lapho udonsa kusukela ekugcineni kobudlelwano:

• Yidla kahle
• Bhala kahle
• Zindla
• Ukuzivocavoca umzimba

Le mikhuba ingase izwakale ilula, kodwa ubuhlungu obujulile benhliziyo bubuhlungu; kushaqisa uhlelo futhi umzimba wakho udinga ukuphumula, ukondliwa okufanele, nendawo ukuze ululame kukho. Kunokuningi kulo mbono kunocwaningo lwasendulo olwengeza umlando olukhombisa ukuthi ukulala kwekhwalithi, ukuzindla, nokuvivinya umzimba konke kunemiphumela emihle esimeni sengqondo (kwesinye isikhathi kusebenza kumzuzwana nje) futhi kungasiza ekunciphiseni imiphumela yesikhathi eside yokudangala.

Linga ngezindlela ezahlukahlukene zokuzinakekela. Ngokusemandleni akho, khetha ukudla okunempilo (noma okungenani, yidla okuthile) futhi uvumele ukulala okwengeziwe kunalokho ovame ukukudinga. Uma umusha ekuzindleni, landela imiyalo eku- # 2 ngezansi ukuze uqalise. Uma umsebenzi owodwa uzizwa unamandla ngokukhethekile, njengokuya egijima, bese uzama ukukusebenzisela uhlelo lwakho lwansuku zonke. Ngaleyo ndlela, uzokwazi ukuthi okungenani ingxenye eyodwa yosuku, uzozinakekela phakathi kokudabuka kwenhliziyo, kweluleka uRinzler.

2. Shintsha Indaba Ozixoxela Wena

Ukuze welaphe ukwenqatshwa futhi sithole ukuhlukana, kufanele sishiye izindaba eziningi esizitshela zona mayelana nokuthi sizohlala siphathwa kanjani noma ukuthi asisoze saluthola kanjani uthando. "Ukuhlupheka kwethu okuningi kuqhutshwa yindaba," kusho uRinzler. “Lapho sizizwa sidabukile ngenxa yobuhlobo bothando, ngokuvamile asisho nje ukuthi, ‘Kunalokhu kucwila emgodini wesisu sami futhi ngivele ngizizwe ngikhathele. Sithi, 'kazi benzani njengamanje, kazi ngabe babona umuntu ...' Izindaba zandisa ukuhlupheka. "

Enye yezindlela eziphumelela kakhulu ukusika kule ngxoxo yangaphakathi ukuzindla. Uhlobo lokuzindla u-Rinzler alufundisayo luvame ukubizwa ngokuthi "ukucabanga" ngoba kufaka ukuletha ingqondo ephelele entweni eyodwa: umoya. (Sinomhlahlandlela wakho wokuqala wokuzindla.)

Ukuze uqalise, uncoma ukuthi uzame nje imizuzu eyi-10 ngosuku. Hlala kamnandi esitobhini noma esihlalweni esikhaleni esingagcwele, setha isibali sikhathi imizuzu eyi-10, futhi ube nawe. Phefumula ngokwemvelo futhi unake umoya. Uma ingqondo yakho izulazula emicabangweni, mane ukwamukele lokho, mhlawumbe ngokusho buthule uthi "ukucabanga," bese ubuyela emoyeni ngomqondo ocacile. Lokhu kungenzeka kaningi phakathi nemizuzu eyi-10 futhi kulungile. Ekupheleni kweseshini, zilule isikhashana bese ufaka usuku lwakho ngokucabangela nangenhliziyo evulekile.

3. Uma Ulingeka Ukuthi Uthinte I-Ex Yakho, Yenza Lokhu Kunalokho

Phakathi kwemiyalezo yombhalo, i-Instagram, nezinye izinkundla zokuxhumana, kunezindlela ezingapheli zokuxhumana nomuntu okubangele ubuhlungu. Kepha akuyona indlela onqamula ngayo ukwahlukana. Ngokuvamile uma senza lokhu akungenxa yokuthi sifuna ukususa umoya, kodwa ngoba silahlekelwe indlela evamile yokuxhumana nalowo muntu futhi sidingida okuthile okufana nalokho esasinakho, uRinzler uyabhala Uthando luyalimaza.

Lapho unesifiso sokuxhumana nowawushade naye, yima kancane bese ubheka isisusa sokuthi kungani ufuna ukufinyelela, uyeluleka. Ingabe kungenxa yokuthi unokuthile okunenjongo ofuna ukukusho, noma kungenxa nje yokukhululeka kwesikhashana?

Uma isisusa sakho singacacile noma sisihle kakhulu (futhi uthembeke kuwena lapha!), u-Rinzler uncoma ukuthi uzame lesi senzo: Thatha umoya ojulile. Beka phansi ifoni yakho. Beka isandla sakho enhliziyweni yakho futhi uphinde uxhumane nomzimba wakho. Ukuzindla nokuzivocavoca kokubili kuyizindlela ezinhle zokwenza lokhu. Isihluthulelo wukuzibamba ekuzithokoziseni umfutho ukuze ufinyelele - ngokuhamba kwesikhathi ukulunywa kuzophela. (Bheka futhi: Izindlela Ezi-5 Zokubhekana Nokuhlukana 'Kwabangaboni')

4. Dedela Ubuhlungu Bakho

"Esinye sezidalwa ezihlakaniphe kunabo bonke engibaziyo, uSakyong Mipham Rinpoche, wake wanikeza isibalo esilinganayo sokuthi ungazidedela kanjani izinto ezibuhlungu zesipiliyoni sethu," kusho uRinzler encwadini yakhe. "Uthando oluxubene nesikhala lubizwa ngokuthi ukudedela."

Uma ufisa ukudedela ubuhlungu bakho, yandisa eyodwa noma zombili lezi zinto bese ubona ukuthi kwenzekani, kusho uRinzler. "Uma abantu bedabuke enhliziyweni abacabangi ukuthi bayoke bakudlule, futhi kungenzeka bangabi ngezindlela abafuna ukuzenza ngoba kungathatha isikhathi eside ukwelapha lezi zinto. Kodwa siyashintsha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. ziguquka njalo futhi zimanzi kakhulu kunalokho esingakucabanga. Izinhliziyo zethu ziyakwazi ukumelana nobuhlungu bempilo futhi sonke siyalulama ngandlela thile. Ngicabanga ukuthi lowo ngumyalezo oyinhloko wencwadi: Ukuthi noma ngabe yini, uzolulama. "

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