It Is a (Virtual) Village

-Delile

• Faka isigodi esibonakalayo
• I-Postpartum ebhadaneni
• Izinsiza ezibonakalayo zomama abasha
• Ukuncelisa ibele izinsiza

Ukukwazi ukuxhuma ku-inthanethi kunginikeze isigodi engingakaze ngibe naso.

Lapho ngikhulelwa indodana yethu, ngazizwa nginengcindezi enkulu yokuba "nomuzi". Ngemuva kwakho konke, yonke incwadi yokukhulelwa engiyifundile, lonke uhlelo lokusebenza newebhusayithi engiyivakashelayo, ngisho nabangani nomndeni osuvele unezingane, kungikhumbuze kaninginingi ukuthi ukuba nengane “kuthatha isigodi.”

Lo mbono wangikhanga nakanjani. Ngingathanda ukuba nogogo nomamkhulu eduze ukuze banginakekele ngemuva kokubeletha, ngifika efulethini lethu sihlome ngezidlo eziphekwe ekhaya neminyaka yokuhlakanipha.

Manje njengoba indodana yami izelwe, kuzoba kuhle ukuthi udadewethu asondele eduze azosigada ukuze mina nomyeni wami sikwazi ukuya osukwini olufanele kahle usuku (ngoba, ake sibhekane nakho, usuku ubusuku akubuzwa uma usanda kuzalwa).

Nginganikela nganoma yini ukuze ngihlale eduze kwezintombi zami ukuze zize zizophuza ikhofi (kulungile, iwayini) ukuxoxa ngezinselelo zobumama njengoba sibuka izingane zethu zidlala ndawonye phansi.

Umzana odumile awuthandeki nje kuphela, ubalulekile. Abantu bayizilwane zomphakathi. Siyadingana ukuze sisinde futhi sichume.

Ngeshwa, kulezi zinsuku kuya ngokwanda futhi kuyaqabukela ukuhlala endaweni efanayo nomndeni wakho nabangane. Yize nginguthunjana ezinganeni ezinhlanu, angihlalanga edolobheni elilodwa isikhathi esingaphezu kweminyaka eyishumi.

Umndeni wami usabalele kulo lonke elaseMelika naseCanada. Umndeni womyeni wami nawo uhlala ezweni lonke. Ngazi abanye abazali abaningi abasesikebheni esifanayo. Ngenkathi ukuba nomzana kuzwakala kukuhle, akunakwenzeka ngabaningi bethu.

Ukuhlala kude nomndeni oseduze kusho ukuthi abazali abaningi abasha bazizwa bebodwa futhi bodwa ngesikhathi lapho badinga ukuxhaswa kakhulu. Ngenkathi ukucindezeleka kwangemva kokubeletha kucatshangwa ukuthi kubangelwa inhlanganisela yezinto ezibandakanya ama-hormone ne-biology, kukhombisile ukuthi ukuzihlukanisa nakho kungaba yisiqalo.

Lokhu kukhulunywa ikakhulukazi ngesikhathi se-COVID-19 kanye nokuqhela komzimba, lapho singeke sibe khona nomndeni wethu nabangane. Ngokujabulisayo, kukhona uhlobo olusha lwesigodi olusimayo - lapho singadingi ukusondelana ngokomzimba ukuze sixhumeke.

Faka isigodi esibonakalayo

Ngenxa yobuchwepheshe besimanje (ikakhulukazi amapulatifomu okuhlangana afana ne-Zoom) siyakwazi ukuxhumana nomndeni, abangani, nenethiwekhi enkulu yokusekela ngezindlela ebesingakaze sizenze ngaphambili. Ngokwami, ezicini eziningi, ngizizwa ngisekelwa kakhulu.

Ngaphambi kwe-oda lokuhlala ekhaya emhlabeni wonke, imibuthano yomndeni wonke umuntu angaya kuyo yenzeka kanye ngonyaka, kabili, uma sinenhlanhla. Ukuhlala kude kangaka, kudingeke ukuthi siphuthe izinsuku zokuzalwa kanye nemingcwabo yelungu lomndeni, ubhapathizo kanye ne-bat mitzvahs.

Selokhu kwavalwa, akukho nelilodwa emalungwini omndeni wethu eligeje umkhosi owodwa. Senze imicimbi yosuku lokuzalwa kuWhatsApp futhi saze sahlangana ngamaholide esasingajwayele ukuwagcina, njengePhasika.

Ukuxhuma cishe kungivumele nokuthi ngikwazi ukubona abangane bami kaningi. Kujwayele ukuthatha izinyanga ukusungula ukuhlangana nezintombi zami. Manje sesinobuso be-FaceTime noma kunini lapho ngiba nemibuzo emisha yomama, okuvame ukuba njalo! Njengoba sonke sisekhaya futhi asidingi ukuthola ukunakekelwa kwezingane, ukuhlela amashejuli wamahora wokuthokozisa akukaze kube lula kangako.

Indodana yami yenza abangane abasha, futhi. Sihambela iqembu lomama lamasonto onke nami, elathuthela ku-inthanethi ngemuva kwemingcele yendawo yokukhosela. Lapho, uthola ukubona ezinye izingane futhi afunde izingoma nokuzivocavoca kokuthuthuka.

Nami futhi, sengakhe ubungani obusha nomama abavela eqenjini futhi kuhlala kujabulisa ukuthi "sibahlangabeze" bona nezingane zabo ezifundweni ezahlukahlukene ezibonakalayo, njenge-yoga yomndeni nekilasi le-baby barre.

Izinsuku zokudlala zeFaceTime zilula ngokukhethekile njengoba zingahlala zifushane njengemizuzu engu-5 futhi ungaphuma kalula lapho ingane yakho incibilika.

I-Postpartum ebhadaneni

Ekuqaleni, ngangidumazeke kakhulu ngesikhathi semikhawulo yokuhlala ekhaya. Kubonakale kuyindida ukuthi mina nengane yami besizikhipha nje ngemuva kwesikhathi sethu sokululama ngemuva kokubeletha lapho besicelwa ukuba sibuyele ekhaya.

Kepha ngasheshe ngabona ukuthi manje sinethuba eliyingqayizivele. Ngaphandle komkhawulo wokusondelana, ngiyakwazi ukufinyelela kubahlinzeki kanye nezinsizakalo ebengingeke ngenye indlela. Akunandaba ukuthi umuntu noma okuthile kusekelwe kuphi.

Ngisebenzise lokhu ngokusebenza nesazi esaziwa kahle se-pelvic esisedolobheni elihlukile, ngihlangana nodokotela wami cishe, ngenza amaseshini nochwepheshe we-lactation enyakatho, futhi, njengoba sisondela esikhathini sokuqeqeshwa kokulala, ochwepheshe emhlabeni wonke (ngokoqobo) siyatholakala kithi.

Bengikulangazelela ukwethula indodana yami edolobheni lethu, kepha ukuba nomuzi ongokoqobo kungivumele ukuthi ngimazise emhlabeni.

Yize kungekho lutho olungathatha indawo yamandla wokuthinta komuntu noma ukuxhumana bukhoma, ukukwazi ukuhlangana online kusivumele ukuthi sixhumane ngezindlela esingakaze sizicabange. Ithemba lami ukuthi sonke sizokuhlala sixhumekile lapho ukuvinjelwa sekuvuliwe, noma ngabe kusesibukweni.

Izinsiza ezibonakalayo zomama abasha

Ungakha idolobhana lakho lokusekelwa. Nalu uhlu lwemibono yokuthi ungaqala kuphi.

Ukuncelisa ibele izinsiza

• ILa Leche League. I-LLL mhlawumbe ingukusekelwa okwaziwa kakhulu futhi okudala kakhulu nemithombo yabazali bencelisa. I-LLL inezahluko kuwo wonke umhlaba, inikeza ukubonisana kwamahhala kwamafoni, futhi ixhuma abazali ngeqembu labo lokuxhaswa le-Facebook.
• Isixhumanisi se-Lactation. Idalwe yi-International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, eyi-RN nomama wezingane ezimbili, leli sayithi lihlose ukunika amandla abazali abancelisayo ngamavidiyo afunwa kakhulu, amaphakheji wevidiyo, kanye nokuxhumana nge-e. Banikela ngezifundo zamahhala zezinsuku eziyi-6 ezinezisekelo ezibalulekile zokuncelisa ibele.
• Ubisi. Leli sayithi linikela ngamakilasi e-inthanethi anhlobonhlobo ngemali ekhokhwayo, kusuka ekupompa emsebenzini kuze kuthuthukise ukutholakala kwakho.

• USarah Ezrin ungumkhuthazi, umbhali, uthisha weyoga, kanye nomqeqeshi wothisha weyoga. Ezinze eSan Francisco, lapho ahlala khona nomyeni wakhe nenja yabo, uSarah ushintsha umhlaba, efundisa ukuzithanda kumuntu oyedwa ngasikhathi. Ngeminye imininingwane ngoSarah sicela uvakashele iwebhusayithi yakhe, www.sarahezrinyoga.com.