Indlela Ukwelashwa Kwamaqhinga Kungakusiza Kanjani Ukuhlehlisa Amaphethini Ayingozi

-Delile

• Yiziphi izidingo eziyinhloko zengane?
• Yiziphi izikimu ezahlukahlukene?
• Ama-schemas enza iziphi izitayela zokubhekana nazo?
• Ukunikela
• Ukugwema
• Ukunxephezelwa ngokweqile
• Yini izindlela ze-schema?
• Ziyini izinhloso zokwelashwa kwe-schema?
• Yiziphi izindlela ezisetshenziswayo?
• Imizwelo
• Ukuxhumana
• Ukuqonda
• Ukuziphatha
• Yini imikhawulo yokwelashwa kwe-schema?
• Ngingazama kanjani ukwelashwa kwe-schema?

Ukwelashwa kwe-Schema wuhlobo olusha lwezokwelapha oluhlanganisa izinto zokwelashwa kokuziphatha kwengqondo (i-CBT), i-psychoanalysis, ithiyori yokunamathisela, kanye nokwelashwa okugxile kumzwelo, phakathi kwabanye.

Kuyindlela yokuhlanganisa ehlose ukwelapha ukuphazamiseka kobuntu nokunye ukukhathazeka ngempilo yengqondo okungaphenduli njalo kwezinye izindlela zokwelashwa. Kungasiza kakhulu ekwelapheni ukuphazamiseka kobuntu bomngcele.

Ekwelashweni kwe-schema, uzosebenza nodokotela ukuze uvule futhi uqonde ama-schema akho, kwesinye isikhathi abizwa ngama-maladaptive schemas okuqala.

AmaSkema amaphethini angasisizi abanye abantu abathuthukisayo uma izidingo zabo ezingokomzwelo zingahlangatshezwa zisencane.

Lezi zinhlelo zingakuthinta impilo yakho yonke futhi zibe nomthelela ezindleleni zokubhekana nezinkinga eziyinkinga nezindlela zokuziphatha uma kungabhekwana nazo.

Ukwelashwa kwe-Schema kuhlose ukukufundisa ukuthi ungaqinisekisa kanjani ukuthi izidingo zakho ezingokomzwelo zifezekiswa ngendlela enempilo engabangeli ukucindezeleka.

Yiziphi izidingo eziyinhloko zengane?

Esinye sezici ezinkulu ekwakhiweni kwama-schemas ukungazitholi izidingo zakho ezingokomzwelo ezisencane.

Lezi zidingo eziyinhloko zifaka:

• umuzwa wokuphepha futhi unamathele ngokuphephile kwabanye
• umuzwa wokuzazi nokuzimela
• inkululeko yokuveza indlela ozizwa ngayo futhi ucele okudingayo kwabanye
• ikhono lokudlala nokuzenzakalela
• imingcele ephephile, efanele iminyaka nobudala

Ngaphezu kwalokho, izinhlobo ezine zokuhlangenwe nakho okungekuhle nazo zingaba nomthelela ekwakhiweni kwama-schema. Lokhu kufaka phakathi:

• Izidingo ezingagcwaliseki. Lokhu kungenzeka uma ungatholi uthando oluvela kubanakekeli noma wehluleka ukuthola ezinye izidingo ezingokomzwelo eziyinhloko.
• Ukuhlukumezeka noma ukuhlukunyezwa. Lokhu kuchaza isimo lapho wahlangabezana nokuhlukunyezwa, ukuhlukumezeka, noma ukucindezeleka okufanayo.
• Ukuzitika ngokweqile noma ukungabi nemikhawulo. Kulesi simo, kungenzeka ukuthi abazali bakho bebekade bevikele ngokweqile noma bebambe iqhaza ngokweqile. Kungenzeka ukuthi abakubekelanga imingcele efanele.
• Ukuhlonza okukhethiwe nokwenziwa kwangaphakathi. Lokhu kubhekisela endleleni omunca ngayo ezinye zezimo zengqondo zabazali bakho noma indlela abaziphatha ngayo. Ungahle ukhombe ezinye zalezi ezinye uzifake kwezinye. Ezinye zingakhula zibe ama-schema, kanti ezinye zikhula zibe izindlela, ezibizwa nangokuthi izindlela zokubhekana nazo.

Yiziphi izikimu ezahlukahlukene?

AmaSkema athambekele ekukhuleni ebuntwaneni futhi imelana nokushintshwa. Kepha ukushiywa kungalawulwa, ama-schemas angadala amaphethini amabi avame ukuqiniswa ngokuhlangana okungenampilo.

Lapho usuhlakulele i-schema, singathonya ngokungacabangi imicabango nezenzo zakho ngomzamo wokuvimbela ukucindezeleka ngokomzwelo. Yize lokhu kuzwakala sengathi kungaba wusizo, izindlela zokubhekana nezinkinga ezenziwa ngama-schema zivame ukungabi nampilo noma ziyingozi.

Iningi labantu livame ukuthuthukisa okungaphezulu kwesisimu esisodwa.

Ochwepheshe bathole ama-schema angama-18 ahlukile, kepha onke awela kwesinye sezigaba ezinhlanu noma izizinda:

• Isizinda I, ukunqanyulwa kanye nokwenqatshwa, kufaka phakathi ama-schemas enza kube nzima ukuthuthukisa ubudlelwano obunempilo.
• I-Domain II, ukuzimela nokusebenza kahle, kufaka phakathi ama-schemas enza kube nzima ukuthuthukisa umuzwa oqinile wokuzimela nokusebenza emhlabeni njengomuntu omdala.
• I-Domain III, imikhawulo engasebenzi kahle, kufaka phakathi ama-scheme athinta ukuzithiba nokukwazi ukuhlonipha imingcele nemikhawulo.
• Domain IV, okunye-ukuqondisa, kufaka phakathi ama-schemas okuholela ekutheni ubeke phambili izidingo zabanye ngaphezu kwezakho.
• Isizinda V, ukuqapha nokuvimbela, kufaka phakathi ama-scheme abeka phambili ukugwema ukwehluleka noma amaphutha ngokuqapha, imithetho, nangokunganaki izifiso noma imizwa.

Ama-schemas enza iziphi izitayela zokubhekana nazo?

Ekwelashweni kwe-schema, ukuphendula kwakho kuma-schema kuyaziwa njengezitayela zokubhekana nazo. Lokhu kungabandakanya imicabango, imizwa, noma isimilo. Zikhula njengendlela yokugwema imizwa ebuhlungu neqisayo etholwa umphumela we-schema esithile.

Izitayela zokubhekana nezinkinga zingasiza ebuntwaneni, njengoba zinikeza indlela yokuphila. Kepha lapho sebekhulile, bangaqinisa ama-schema.

Ayikho imithetho eqinile mayelana nokuthi yimaphi ama-schemas aholela ezitayeleni ezithile zokubhekana nezinkinga. Isitayela sakho sokubhekana nesimo kungenzeka ukuthi sisekelwe esimweni sakho sengqondo noma ngisho nasezitayeleni zokubhekana nezinkinga ozifunde kubazali bakho.

Ziyahlukahluka kuye ngomuntu nomuntu. Abantu ababili bangaphendula ku-schema esifanayo ngesitayela esifanayo ngezindlela ezihluke kakhulu. Ngokufanayo, abantu ababili abane-schema efanayo nabo bangaphendula ngezitayela ezimbili ezihlukene.

Isitayela sakho sokubhekana naso singashintsha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, noma ngabe usabhekene ne-schema efanayo.

Izitayela ezintathu zokubhekana ngokukhululekile zihambisana ngokukhululekile nempendulo yokulwa noma yokundiza noma yokuqandisa:

Ukunikela

Lokhu kufaka ukwamukela i-schema bese unikeza kuso. Imvamisa kuphumela ekuziphatheni okuqinisa noma okuqhubeka nephethini ye-schema.

Isibonelo, uma uzinikela ku-schema esakhiwa njengomphumela wokunganakwa ngokomzwelo useyingane, ungahle uzithole ususebudlelwaneni obufaka ukunganakwa ngokomzwelo.

Ukugwema

Lokhu kubandakanya ukufaka umzamo wokuphila ngaphandle kokubangela i-schema. Ungagwema imisebenzi noma izimo ezingase ziyivuse noma zikwenze uzizwe usengozini.

Ukugwema i-schema sakho kungakushiya uthambekele ekusetshenzisweni kwezidakamizwa, indlela yokuziphatha eyingozi noma ephoqelelayo, nezinye izindlela zokuziphatha ezinikeza ukuphazamiseka.

Ukunxephezelwa ngokweqile

Lokhu kufaka phakathi ukuzama ukulwa ne-schema ngokwenza okuphikisana nakho ngokuphelele. Lokhu kungabonakala kuyimpendulo enempilo ku-schema, kepha ukunxeshezelwa ngokweqile ngokuvamile kudlulela kakhulu.

Imvamisa kuholela ezenzweni noma ekuziphatheni okubonakala kunolaka, ukufuna ngenkani, ukungazweli, noma ukweqisa ngandlela thile. Lokhu kungathinta ubudlelwano bakho nabanye.

Yini izindlela ze-schema?

Ekwelashweni kwe-schema, imodi ukucabanga kwesikhashana okubandakanya zombili isimo sakho samanje sezemizwa nokuthi ubhekana kanjani naso.

Ngamanye amagama, imodi yakho iyinhlanganisela yezikimu ezisebenzayo nezitayela zokubhekana nazo. Izindlela zingasiza (zivumelane nezimo) noma zingasizi ngalutho (maladaptive).

Izindlela ze-Schema zisiza abelaphi amaqembu ama-scheme ndawonye ukuze bakwazi ukuwakhuluma njengesimo esisodwa somqondo, kunokuba babe nezici ezithile.

Izindlela ze-Schema zehlukaniswe ngezigaba ezine:

• Izindlela zezingane zibonakala ngemizwa nokuziphatha okufana nengane.
• Izindlela zokubhekana nokungasebenzi asetshenziselwa ukuvimbela ukucindezeleka ngokomzwelo kepha agcina eseqinisa i-schema.
• Izindlela zomzali ezingasebenzi kungukufunda ngaphakathi kwamazwi abucayi, afunayo, noma anokhahlo labazali.
• Imodi yabantu abadala enempilo imele impilo yakho, esebenza kahle. Le modi ingasiza ekulawuleni ezinye izindlela ngokubeka imikhawulo nokubala imiphumela yezinye izindlela.

Ziyini izinhloso zokwelashwa kwe-schema?

Ekwelashweni kwe-schema, uzosebenza nodokotela wakho ku:

• khomba bese uqala izikimu zokwelapha
• khomba uphinde ubhekane nezitayela zokubhekana nezimo eziphazamisa izidingo ezingokomzwelo
• shintsha amaphethini emizwa nokuziphatha okuvela kuma-schema
• funda ukuthi ungahlangabezana kanjani nezidingo zakho ezingokomzwelo ngezindlela ezinempilo, eziguqukayo
• funda ukuthi ungabhekana kanjani (ngendlela enempilo) nokukhungatheka nosizi lapho izidingo ezithile zingafinyelelwa

Ekugcineni, konke lokhu kuzokusiza ukuthi wakhe imodi yabantu abadala eqinile, nenempilo. Imodi yabantu abadala esezingeni eliphakeme ingasiza ekwelapheni nasekulawuleni ezinye izindlela futhi ikusize ukuthi ungakhungatheki ngemiphumela yazo.

Yiziphi izindlela ezisetshenziswayo?

Abelaphi be-Schema bangasebenzisa amasu amaningi phakathi nokwelashwa. Amasu athile angasebenza kangcono kwabanye abantu nama-schema kunabanye. Uma inqubo ethile ingakusebenzeli, qiniseka ukuthi wazise umelaphi wakho.

Kulelo nothi, khumbula ukuthi ubudlelwano bakho nodokotela wakho yingxenye ebalulekile yokwelashwa kwe-schema. Kunemiqondo emibili ebalulekile evela kumasu amaningi asetshenziswa ekwelashweni kwe-schema. Zombili zisebenza kahle kakhulu lapho uzizwa uphephile futhi unethezekile nodokotela wakho.

Le mibono yile:

• Ukulwa empathic. Umelaphi wakho uqinisekisa ama-schemas aqhamuka ekwelashweni, anikeze ukuqonda nozwela ngenkathi ekusiza ubone ukubaluleka koshintsho.
• Ukukhulisa okulinganiselwe. Umelaphi wakho usiza ukugcwalisa izidingo ezingokomzwelo ezingazange zifezwe ebuntwaneni ngokunikeza ukuphepha, uzwela nenhlonipho. "Ukulinganiselwa" kumane kusho ukuthi umelaphi wakho uqinisekisa ukuthi lokhu kukhulisa kabusha kuhambisana nezindinganiso zokuziphatha zabasebenzi bezempilo yengqondo.

Ngokuvamile, le mibono yenziwa ngamasu awela ezigabeni ezine:

Imizwelo

Amasu wezemizwa abandakanya ukusebenzisa imizwa ukulwa nama-schema. Zikusiza ukuthi uzwe imizwa ngokugcwele futhi uyiveze ekuphepheni kokwelashwa. Izindlela ezivamile zokuthinta imizwa zifaka phakathi izithombe eziqondisiwe nokudlala indima.

Ukuxhumana

Amasu wokusebenzelana nabantu akusiza ukuthi uhlole ubudlelwano bakho ukuthola izindlela ama-schemas abuthinta ngazo.

Ukubona ukuthi ama-schemas nezimpendulo kudlala kanjani ekwelashweni kungakusiza ukuthola amaphethini afanayo empilweni yakho. Lokhu kungabandakanya ukuletha umlingani noma umngane oseduze esimisweni sokwelapha.

Ukuqonda

Amasu wokuqonda ahlanganisa ukukhomba nokuphonsela inselelo amaphethini wokucabanga ayingozi aqhamuka kuma-schema. Uzosebenza nodokotela wakho ukuze ubuyekeze okwenzeka empilweni ukuthola ubufakazi obusekela noma obuphikisana ne-schema.

Lokhu kungenziwa ngokusetshenziswa kwama-flashcards noma izingxoxo ezihlelekile lapho uzokhuluma khona zombili ngokuthanda nokuphikisana ne-schema.

Ukuziphatha

Amasu wokuziphatha akusiza ufunde ukwenza izinqumo ezinhle, ezinempilo ngokushintsha izindlela zokuziphatha ezibangelwa isitayela sakho sokubhekana nesimo.

Ukushintsha amaphethini wokuziphatha, ungahle usebenze ngamakhono wokuxhumana ngokulingisa noma ukhulume ngenkinga nangesixazululo nomelaphi wakho. Bangakunika nokuzivocavoca okuthile okufanele ukwenze phakathi kweseshini.

Yini imikhawulo yokwelashwa kwe-schema?

Ukwelashwa kwe-Schema kukhombisa isithembiso njengokwelashwa kokukhathazeka okuningi kwezempilo yengqondo, kufaka phakathi ukuphazamiseka kokudla nokudangala.

Iningi locwaningo olukhona selubheke indima yokwelashwa kwe-schema ekwelapheni ukuphazamiseka kobuntu emingceleni nokunye ukuphazamiseka kobuntu.

Kuze kube manje, imiphumela iyathembisa. Isibonelo, isilingo esilawulwa ngo-2014 saphetha ngokuthi ukwelashwa kwe-schema kungasebenza kakhulu ekwelapheni ukuphazamiseka kobuntu.

Kepha ukwelashwa kwe-schema bekukhona kuphela kusukela ngawo-1980. Lesi yisikhathi esifushane impela emhlabeni wezengqondo. Ngenxa yalokhu, azikho izifundo eziningi zekhwalithi, zesikhathi eside ngemiphumela yazo.

Ngenkathi ucwaningo olukhona luthembisa, iningi lochwepheshe liyavuma ukuthi kunesidingo sokuqhubeka kokulingwa nocwaningo.

Uma kuqhathaniswa nezinye izinhlobo zokwelashwa, ukwelashwa kwe-schema nakho kungaba ukuzibophezela kwesikhathi eside. Ungadinga ukuthola ukwelashwa kwe-schema iminyaka. Uma ungenawo umshwalense, lokhu kungabiza kakhulu.

Ngingazama kanjani ukwelashwa kwe-schema?

Kunzima ukuthola umeluleki we-schema kunezinye izinhlobo zabelaphi, ikakhulukazi e-United States, kepha izinsiza zikhona.

I-International Society of Schema Therapy inomkhombandlela ohlela abelaphi be-schema abaqeqeshiwe ngokusemthethweni.

Ungazama futhi ukusesha imininingwane yolwazi jikelele, kufaka phakathi othole owelapha i-American Psychological Association.

Zama ukubheka abelaphi abanikela nge-CBT. Ukwelashwa kwe-Schema kudonsa kakhulu kule ndlela, ngakho-ke abanye abelaphi be-CBT bangahle babe nokuhlangenwe nakho okuthile nge-schema therapy noma imigomo yayo eyinhloko.

Njengoba ukwelashwa kwe-schema kungabiza ngaphezu kwezinye izinhlobo zokwelashwa kwezempilo yengqondo, kuwumqondo omuhle ukubuza abelaphi ngezindleko, noma ngabe bayawamukela umshuwalense, nokunye ukukhathazeka kwezezimali ongahle ube nakho. Umhlahlandlela wethu ekwelashweni okungabizi nakho kungasiza.