Yini Abelaphi Abafisa Ukuyazi Ngalokho Abakukhokhisayo

-Delile

• Lapho ukwelashwa kungafinyeleleki
• Umbono womelaphi
• Ukuhlaziya izindleko zangempela zokwelashwa
• Inkinga ngomshwalense
• Lapho imali igcina abantu belashwa
• Abelaphi bazama ukusiza

Sifaka imikhiqizo esicabanga ukuthi ilusizo kubafundi bethu. Uma uthenga ngezixhumanisi ezikuleli khasi, singathola ikhomishini encane. Nansi inqubo yethu.

"Akekho umuntu oba ngumelaphi ngethemba lokuthi uzoceba."

Cishe eminyakeni engama-20 edlule ngacindezeleka kakhulu. Kade kwakhiwa isikhathi eside, kepha lapho senginakho engisakubiza ngokuthi “ukuwohloka,” kwabonakala kwenzeka ngasikhathi sinye.

Nganginikezwe isonto emsebenzini wami ngamaholidi. Kepha esikhundleni sokusebenzisa leso sikhathi ukuba nabathandekayo noma ukuqala uhambo lwamaholide, ngazivalela endlini yami futhi ngenqaba ukuhamba.

Phakathi nalelo sonto, ngonakala ngokushesha. Angizange ngilale, ngikhetha ukuhlala ngiphapheme izinsuku zilandelana ngibuka noma yini eyenzeka kukhebula.

Angizange ngishiye umbhede wami. Angizange ngigeze. Ngivale izimpumputhe futhi angikaze ngikhanyise amalambu, ngiphila ngokukhanya kwalesosikrini sethelevishini kunalokho. Futhi ukuphela kokudla engangikudla, izinsuku ezi-7 ziqondile, kwakungu-Wheat Thins ofakwe koshizi kakhilimu, njalo kugcinwa kufinyelela engalweni phansi kwami.

Ngesikhathi "ukuhlala kwami" kuphelile, angikwazanga ukubuyela emsebenzini. Angikwazanga ukushiya indlu yami. Wona kanye umcabango wokwenza lokho kubeka inhliziyo yami igijime nekhanda lami lizungeze.

Kwakunguyise owafika emnyango wami wabona ukuthi angiphilile kahle. Wangitholela ama-aphoyintimenti nodokotela womndeni wami kanye nomelaphi ngokushesha.

Ngaleso sikhathi izinto zazihlukile. Ukubizelwa umsebenzi wami futhi ngafakwa ekhefini lokungabikho emsebenzini lokugula ngengqondo, nginikezwe inyanga yonke ukuze ngibuyele endaweni enempilo.

Benginomshuwalense omuhle obemboza izikhathi engibekelwe zona zokwelashwa, ngakho-ke ngikwazile ukukhokhela ukuvakashelwa nsuku zonke ngenkathi sisalinde izindondo ebengibekiwe ukuthi zingene kuzo. Akukho lapho bekufanele ngibe nokukhathazeka ngokuthi ngizoyikhokhela kanjani enye yazo . Bekufanele nje ngigxile ekupholeni.

Ukube bengingaba nokuwohloka okufanayo namuhla, akukho kwalokho okungaba yiqiniso.

Lapho ukwelashwa kungafinyeleleki

Njengawo wonke umuntu kuleli zwe, ngibone ukutholakala kokuncipha kokunakekelwa kwezempilo okungabizi, futhi ikakhulukazi ukunakekelwa kwezempilo okungabizi kakhulu, emashumini amabili edlule.

Namuhla, umshwalense wami unikeza inani elilinganiselwe lokuvakashelwa kokwelashwa. Kepha kubuye kudonswe imali engu- $ 12,000 ngonyaka, okusho ukuthi ukuya ekwelashweni cishe njalo kuholela ekutheni ngikhokhe ngokuphelele ephaketheni.

Okuthile engisakwenzayo okungenani amahlandla ambalwa ngonyaka, uma nje kungena futhi ngiphinda ngilinganise imicabango yami.

Iqiniso liwukuthi, ngingumuntu ongahlala njalo angcono ngokuqokwa ngokwelashwa okuvamile. Kepha ezimweni zami zamanje, njengomama ongayedwa oqhuba ibhizinisi lami, angihlali nginezinsizakusebenza zokwenza lokho kwenzeke.

Futhi ngeshwa, imvamisa lapho ngidinga kakhulu ukwelashwa lapho ngikwazi ukukukhokhela khona okuncane.

Umzabalazo ngiyazi ukuthi angingedwa ekubhekaneni nawo.

Siphila emphakathini othanda ukukhomba umunwe ekuguleni kwengqondo njengempongo yokwenza yonke into kusuka ekungabi nakhaya kuya ekudutshulweni kwabantu abaningi, kepha ekubekeni lelo cala ngandlela thile sisahluleka ukubeka phambili ukuthola abantu usizo abaludingayo.

Luhlelo olunamaphutha olungabekeli muntu impumelelo. Kepha akubona kuphela labo abadinga ukunakekelwa kwezempilo yengqondo abahlupheka ezandleni zalolo hlelo.

Kubuye kube ngabelaphi uqobo.

Umbono womelaphi

"Akekho umuntu owelaphayo ngethemba lokuceba," kusho umelaphi osemusha uJohn Mopper etshela iHealthline.

Uthi: “Ukukwazi ukwenza engikwenzayo ukuze ngiziphilise kuyinto emangalisa kakhulu emhlabeni. “Iqiniso lokuthi kunoma yiluphi usuku olunikeziwe, ngingahlala ngaphesheya kwentsha eyisithupha kuya kweyisishiyagalombili ngibe nezingxoxo zamahora ayisithupha kuya kwayisishiyagalombili, ngethemba lokuthi ngizoba nomthelela osukwini lomuntu ngendlela enhle, bese ngiyakhokhelwa? Ngeqiniso yilokho okungivusa njalo ekuseni. ”

Kepha ukuthi ukukhokhelwa kwayo ingxenye kwesinye isikhathi engabeka idamper emsebenzini iningi labelaphi abazama ukuwenza.

UMopper ungumnikazi wabalingani beBlueprint Mental Health eSomerville, eNew Jersey. Leli thimba liqukethe yena nomkakhe, uMichele Levin, kanye nabelaphi abahlanu ababasebenzelayo.

Uyachaza: “Siphelelwe inethiwekhi ngokuphelele nomshwalense. "Abelaphi abangawuthathi umshwalense bavame ukuthola i-rap embi kwabanye abantu, kodwa iqiniso ukuthi uma izinkampani zomshuwalense zingakhokha inani elifanele, singavuleleka kakhulu ekuxhumaneni nabantu."

Manje-ke, ingabe “isilinganiso esifanele” sibukeka kanjani?

Ukuhlaziya izindleko zangempela zokwelashwa

UCarolyn Ball ungumeluleki onelayisense futhi ungumnikazi we-Elevate Counselling + Wellness eHinsdale, e-Illinois. Utshela uHealthline ukuthi kunezinto eziningi eziya ekubekeni isilinganiso sokwelashwa.

“Njengomnikazi wokuzimela wangasese, ngibheka imfundo yami nesipiliyoni sami kanjalo nemakethe, izindleko zokuqasha endaweni yangakithi, izindleko zokuhlinzeka ngehhovisi, izindleko zokukhangisa, imfundo eqhubekayo, imali ekhokhelwayo, umshwalense, futhi ekugcineni , izindleko zokuphila, ”usho kanje.

Ngenkathi izikhathi zokwelashwa zivame ukuqhuba iziguli noma yikuphi kusuka ku- $ 100 kuya ku- $ 300 ngehora, zonke izindleko ezibalulwe ngenhla ziphuma kuleyo mali. Futhi abelaphi banemindeni yabo okufanele bayinakekele, izikweletu zabo okufanele bazikhokhe.

Inkinga ngomshwalense

Ukwenza kweBall kungenye engathathi umshwalense, ikakhulukazi ngenxa yezinga eliphansi lezinkampani zomshuwalense okhokhelwayo.

"Into eyodwa engicabanga ukuthi abantu abayiqapheli ukuthi ihora lokwelashwa lihluke kanjani kweminye imisebenzi yezokwelapha," kuchaza uBall. “Udokotela noma udokotela wamazinyo uyakwazi ukubona iziguli ezifika kweziyisishiyagalombili ngehora. Umelaphi ubona eyodwa kuphela. ”

Lokhu kusho ukuthi ngenkathi udokotela wezokwelapha ekwazi ukubona, futhi akhokhele, iziguli ezingaba ngu-48 ngosuku, abelaphi ngokuvamile banqunyelwe cishe emahoreni ayisithupha akhokhiswayo.

"Lowo umehluko omkhulu emholweni!" Kusho uBall. "Ngikholelwa ngobuqotho ukuthi abelaphi bemisebenzi abenza umsebenzi ubaluleke ngendlela efanayo nomsebenzi owenziwa abanye ochwepheshe bezokwelapha, kodwa iholo lincane kakhulu."

Ngaphezu kwakho konke lokho, ukukhokha ngomshwalense kuvame ukuhambisana nezindleko ezengeziwe, ngokusho kwesazi sokusebenza kwengqondo emitholampilo uDkt Carla Manly.

“Ngokuya ngohlobo lokukhokhiswa komshuwalense, abelaphi abaningi kufanele basebenze ngenkonzo yokubhila. Lokhu kungakhungathekisa futhi kubize kakhulu, ”usho kanje, echaza ukuthi umphumela wokugcina ngukuthi umelaphi uvame ukuthola imali engaphansi kwengxenye yalokho obekukhokhelwe ekuqaleni.

Lapho imali igcina abantu belashwa

Abelaphi bayazi ukuthi amazinga abo weseshini angaba yisithiyo ekufuneni ukwelashwa.

"Ngokudabukisayo, ngicabanga ukuthi lokhu kuvame kakhulu," kusho uManly. "Abantu abaningi engisebenza nabo banabangani nomndeni abadinga ukwelashwa kodwa abangahambi ngezizathu ezimbili ezibalulekile: izindleko nokucwaswa."

Uthi usize abantu abavela ezweni lonke ukuthola ukuthunyelwa ngezindleko eziphansi ukuze bathole ukwelashwa lapho kudingeka. Uyachaza: “Ngivele ngenzela othile eFlorida. "Futhi izinsizakalo 'zezindleko eziphansi' zaziphakathi kuka- $ 60 kuya ku- $ 75 ngeseshini, okuyimali enkulu kubantu abaningi!”

Akekho ophikisana nokuthi abeluleki badinga ukuziphilisa, futhi ngamunye wochwepheshe abasebenza uHealthline okhulume naye ubeke amanani abo abhekane nalesi sidingo emqondweni.

Kepha bonke kusengabantu abafake umsebenzi wokusiza ngoba befuna ukusiza abantu. Ngakho-ke, lapho bebhekene namakhasimende, noma abangahle babe ngamakhasimende, abaludinga ngempela usizo kepha abakwazi ukuluthola, bazithola befuna izindlela zokusiza.

"Lokhu kunzima kimi," kuchaza uBall. “Ukuya ekwelashweni kungashintsha impilo yomuntu. Inhlala-kahle yakho ngokomzwelo ibaluleke kakhulu ekujabuleleni ubudlelwano obusezingeni, ukuhlakulela injongo, nokwakha ukuzethemba okusimeme. ”

Ufuna wonke umuntu athole lokho kufinyelela, kodwa futhi uqhuba ibhizinisi. Uthi: “Nginenkinga yokulinganisa isifiso sami sokusiza wonke umuntu onesidingo sokuziphilisa,” kusho yena.

Abelaphi bazama ukusiza

Ibhola ligodla izindawo eziningi ezishibhile esikalini sakhe isonto ngalinye kumakhasimende adinga usizo kepha angakwazi ukukhokhela imali egcwele. Umkhuba kaMopper wenza into efanayo, ubeke eceleni ama-aphoyintimenti isonto ngalinye okuyi-pro bono ngokuqinile yamakhasimende asezekile aveze leso sidingo.

"Ukunikela ngezinsizakalo ezithile mahhala kumakhasimende angenazo izindlela empeleni kuhlanganiswe nemikhombandlela yethu yokuziphatha," kuchaza uMopper.

UManly ugcwalisa isifiso sakhe sokusiza labo abadinga kakhulu ngezinye izindlela, ngokuzithandela masonto onke esikhungweni sendawo sokuvuselela izidakamizwa notshwala, ukubamba iqembu lokuxhaswa ngezindleko eziphansi masonto onke, kanye nokuvolontiya nabadala.

Bobathathu ababaluliwe basiza abantu ukuthi bathole izinsizakalo ezingabizi uma kungenzeki nje ukuthi babonakale emahhovisi abo. Ezinye zeziphakamiso zabo zifaka:

• imitholampilo yomphakathi
• amakolishi asekolishi (kwesinye isikhathi anabafundi abathola ukwelulekwa ngamazinga ancishisiwe)
• izinsizakalo zokwelulekwa kontanga
• amasevisi afana ne-Open Path Collective, engenzi-nzuzo esiza abantu bathole izinsizakalo zokwelashwa ezibiza izindleko zasendaweni
• ukwelashwa okuku-inthanethi, ukuhlinzeka ngezinsizakalo ngevidiyo noma ngengxoxo ngesilinganiso esincishisiwe

Kunezinketho ezitholakalayo kulabo abangenawo amandla ezezimali, kodwa uManly uyavuma, “Ukuthola izinsizakusebenza, okuvame ukuba‘ lula ’kumelaphi noma omunye uchwepheshe, kungasabisa noma kusabise kumuntu ohlushwa ukucindezeleka noma ukukhathazeka. Yingakho kubaluleke kakhulu ukukwazi ukulekelela ukunikela ngokudluliswa. ”

Ngakho-ke, uma udinga usizo, ungavumeli imali kube yinto ekuvimbela ukuthi ungayitholi.

Finyelela kumelaphi wendawo osendaweni yangakini, bese uthole ukuthi yini abangakunikeza yona. Noma ungenayo imali yokubabona, bangakwazi ukukusiza ukuthi uthole umuntu ongambona.

ULeah Campbell ungumbhali nomhleli ohlala e-Anchorage, e-Alaska. Ungumama ongayedwa ngokuzikhethela ngemuva kochungechunge olwehlisayo lwezehlakalo ezaholela ekwamukelweni kwendodakazi yakhe. ULeah futhi ungumbhali wencwadi ethi "Single Infertile Female" futhi ubhale kakhulu ngezihloko zokungazali, ukutholwa, nokuba ngumzali. Ungaxhumana noLeah nge-Facebook, iwebhusayithi yakhe, naku-Twitter.