Imikhuba Emihlanu Enempilo Yokukuthola Ngokuhlukana

-Delile

• Inganekwane: Ukuphinde Uvakashele Okwedlule Kuzokwenza Kube nzima
• Inganekwane: Ukulila Akuzuzisi
• Inganekwane: Ukuphindaphinda Ucansi Kukusiza Ukuqhubekela Phambili
• Inganekwane: Ukungamlandeli Kuzo Zonke Izinkundla Zokuxhumana Kuzokwenza Kube lula
• Inganekwane: Ukunikela Konke Owenzile Njengabantu Abashadile Kuzolimaza Okuncane
• Buyekeza kwe-

Ngemuva kokwehlukana okunesiphithiphithi, ukungaphinde ukhulume ngokuhlukana kungabonakala kuyindlela elula yokushiya ubuhlungu benhliziyo yakho esikhathini esedlule-kepha isifundo esisha esishicilelwe kumagazini Isayensi Yezenhlalo Nezengqondo iphakamisa okuhlukile. Uma udonsa kanzima ngokwehlukana futhi ufuna ukwenza inqubo yokutakula ingabi buhlungu ngangokunokwenzeka, gwema le mikhuba emihlanu yokuhlukana futhi uzozizwa ungcono ngokushesha. (Ukuqonda ukuthi kungani kungasiza! Bheka ukuthi "Yini Okungahambanga Kahle?" Ukuqomisana Ngezinkinga, Kuchaziwe.)

Inganekwane: Ukuphinde Uvakashele Okwedlule Kuzokwenza Kube nzima

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Ucwaningo ku Isayensi Yezenhlalo Nezengqondo bathole ukuthi abantu abahlale bezindla ngobudlelwano babo obuhlulekile empeleni bathole ukucaciseleka futhi bakhombisa izimpawu zokululama ngokomzwelo kunalabo abangacabanganga ngakho. Kodwa ngokukhumbuza abahlanganyeli ngokulahlekelwa kwabo, kwabaphoqa ukuba bagxile esithombeni esikhulu-okungukuthi. ukuthi bangobani ngaphandle komlingani wabo-futhi empeleni basize ukusheshisa ukutakula. Lokho kusho ukuthi uhlelo lwakho lokusekela ngemva kokuhlukana kufanele kube umngane ozolalela. "Abesifazane bavame ukubambisana, ngakho-ke umngane ongenalo iqiniso nge-ex yakho ngeke akwenze uzizwe ungcono," kusho omunye umbhali uGrace Larson waseNorthwestern University. Umyalezo wokuyisa ekhaya lapha awugcini nje ngokuzicwilisa imizwa nokuzikhandla, uyachaza, kepha kunalokho bheka isimo ngombono omusha.

Inganekwane: Ukulila Akuzuzisi

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Impela, ukubuka ingxenye yengilazi engenalutho ngokuvamile kuyisimo esibi okufanele usithathe. Kepha udinga ukuzinika isikhathi sokuzizwa unesizungu ngemuva kokwehlukana, kusho uKaren Sherman, Ph.D., isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo nomlobi Umlingo Womshado! Ithole, Yigcine, Futhi Uyenze Igcine. Kuthatha abantu cishe amasonto ayi-11 ngemuva kokuhlukana ukuqala ukubuka isimo sabo esisha ngendlela efanele, ngokusho kocwaningo olwenziwe ku- Ijenali ye-Positive Psychology. Ukudabuka—noma ngabe lokho kusho ukuthi ukhala kakhulu nge-rom-com noma ukuya edolobheni ku-Ben & Jerry nentombi-kuzosiza inqubo yokululama, kusho u-Sherman. (Yeqa icala lapho uphuma: SHAPE Best Blogger Awards: 20 Healthy Eating Blogs Asenza Sihambe Mmmmm...)

Inganekwane: Ukuphindaphinda Ucansi Kukusiza Ukuqhubekela Phambili

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"Ubulili obubuyela emuva buningi beBhand Aid kunekhambi," kusho uSherman. Kungase kungakulimazi ukululama kwakho, kodwa ngeke kusize kakhulu. Eqinisweni, abantu abaphishekela abalingani abasha bocansi ngemva kokuhlukana ocwaningweni oluvela eNyuvesi yaseMissouri abazange babonise ukucindezeleka okuncane, intukuthelo encane, noma ukuzethemba okuphezulu kamuva. Lokho kushiwo, ezinye izifundo zibonisa ukuthi ubudlelwano obubuyisanayo bungasiza ekunciphiseni ukushiswa kwangemva kokuhlukana. “Ukuthandana nomuntu ongathandani naye akubi kakhulu uma kuqhathaniswa nocansi olukhululekile futhi lungasiza kakhulu ngoba luyisiphazamiso,” kusho uSherman. Ubudlelwano obuphindiwe ngokusobala akufanele bube bucayi kakhulu, ngoba udinga isikhathi sokucubungula imizwa yakho. Kodwa ukuhlangana nabantu abasha kungakusiza ubone ukuthi kunokuningi ongakulangazelela, usho kanje.

Inganekwane: Ukungamlandeli Kuzo Zonke Izinkundla Zokuxhumana Kuzokwenza Kube lula

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Abantu abasala bengabangane bakaFacebook nowayethandana nabo ngemva kokuhlukana kwakamuva empeleni bazizwa benemizwa engemihle kangako ngokuhlukana, kanye nesifiso esincane sobulili nokulangazelela ama-ex abo, ngokocwaningo lwaseBrithani. Kodwa-ke, ukusebenzisa lokho kufinyelela ekugxileni emisebenzini yakhe kuyiphikisile yonke le miphumela emihle-futhi kwabangela ukucindezeleka okwengeziwe ngokwahlukana. (Akukona nje ukulandela umkhondo okungenampilo: Ikhohlakele Kangakanani i-Facebook, i-Twitter, ne-Instagram ye-Mental Health?) "Konke kuncike ekuzimiseleni kwakho," kusho uSherman. Ukwenza kabusha ilangabi muva nje kungakwenza ucabange kabanzi ngabo ngoba uyazi ukuthi awukwazi ukubona ukuthi kwenzekani empilweni yabo. Ukuqapha ukuziphatha kwakho evikini lokuqala noma amabili kuyindlela engcono kakhulu yokwazi ukuthi iyiphi indlela engcono kakhulu kuwe, uyanezela.

Inganekwane: Ukunikela Konke Owenzile Njengabantu Abashadile Kuzolimaza Okuncane

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Ukulahla konke okungokwabo kuyisidingo, kusho uSherman. Kepha ukususa ngokoqobo konke okukhumbuza ngaye-i.e. uhlobo oluthile lomculo noma uhlobo oluthile lokudla-nje akunangqondo. Kunokuba ungaphinde uye ku-karaoke futhi ngoba lokho kusebenzisa ukuba ubusuku bakho bosuku obuyintandokazi, vele uhambe nabantu abasha ukuze wakhe abangani abahle kakhulu ngalowo msebenzi. Izinhlangano ezintsha noma eziyingqayizivele zivame ukuba namandla kakhulu ezinkumbulweni zethu, ngokusho kocwaningo olwenziwe eCity University London, ngakho-ke ngokuhamba kwesikhathi izinkumbulo ezintsha zizothatha indawo endala, kuchaza uSherman. (Kungenzeka futhi ukuthi izinkumbulo zibe zinhle: Zama enye yezindlela ezingcono kakhulu zokuthola izintombi eziyizinkulungwane eziyisihlanu.)

Buyekeza kwe-