Iminithi Engqondweni: Ngabe Ngihlala Ebudlelwaneni?

-Delile

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Iningi labantu lingakutshela ukuthi uma usuvele uzibuza, "ngiyalungisa?" khona-ke uyikho-nokuthi awufanele. Kodwa kwenzekani uma umbono owubekele umlingani wakho ungekho ngokoqobo noma uphelelwe yisikhathi? (Mhlawumbe uke waqamba inganekwane mayelana noPrince Charming njengoba intombazanyana futhi ichwane liqhuma lifaka uphethiloli emlilweni.) Ngezansi, izindlela ezinhlanu zokudiliza indoda yamaphupho akho, zihlole wena-futhi uqiniseke ukuthi ubuhlobo bakho buyisibopho. kufanelekile.

1. Shayela umngani ucingo: Iba nengxoxo nezintombi zakho-okuthemba ukuthi zinemibono ehluke kakhulu-futhi ubone ukuthi uthola yiphi impendulo kumfana wakho. Abangani bakho bakwazi kahle futhi banombono wenhloso eyodwa kumfana osempilweni yakho. Uma bethembekile kuwe, uzokwazi ukuthola imibono embalwa eyehlukile kulokho abanye abakubonayo ebudlelwaneni bakho. Ingabe imicabango yabo ikhombisa eyakho? Ingabe umangazwa okuthile abakushoyo?

2. Thatha izwi likamama ngohlamvu lukasawoti: Qiniseka ukuthi ukungabaza kwakho ngokuxazulula akuveli emndenini wakho. Kumnandi umama wakho ecabanga ukuthi kufanele ulwele ukuba nendoda ephelele njengoba uyintombazane ephelele (ahem), kodwa mhlawumbe okukujabulisayo kuhlukile. Engqondweni yakhe, ungahle uhlale, kepha kweyakho, wenza okulungele wena-futhi kulungile. Ngemuva kwakho konke, ubaba wakho akaphelele, kodwa kungenzeka ukuthi uphelele umama wakho, akunjalo?

3. Ungavumeli ukwesaba kukushukumisele: Ungalinge ukhethe indoda ngoba uyesaba ukuba wedwa. Abesifazane abaningi bashadile futhi banesizungu kakhulu. Eqinisweni, abesifazane abangashadile abajabulayo baphila isikhathi eside kunanoma ngubani. Ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi umshado, kwabesifazane abaningi, usho amahora amaningi omsebenzi wasendlini kanye nempilo emfushane. Ngakho-ke ungacabangi ukuthi kufanele ube nedolo. Khuphuka phezulu Singed Out nguBella DePaulo, Ph.D., uma ufuna ucwaningo olwengeziwe kanye nobufakazi obuqinile bokuthi kungani i-singledom ingeyimbi kangako.

4. Thola okusebenzayo: Qiniseka ukuthi awenzi lutho ngamawala phakathi nezinyanga ezimbalwa zokuqala zothando lwe-dopamine. Ukuvumela ubudlelwano bakho ukuthi bukhule ngendlela efike ngesikhathi kukuvumela ukuthi ufunde futhi nokuningi ngomuntu onaye esikhundleni sokugijimela kokuthile okususelwa emavikini ambalwa okuqala ashisayo nasindayo.

5. Dlala ngemizwa yakho: Zama lobu buqili. Phenya amakhanda emali ukuze umgcine, imisila ukuze aqhubeke nokubheka, bese uyapheqa. Ngena ngempela manje, njengokungathi lesi yisona sici esinqumayo ngomshado wakho (ngoba "kuze kusehlukanise ukufa"!) Manje bheka. Ngokunikezwa yilokho okushiwo uhlamvu lwemali, ingabe isisu sakho siyacwila noma inhliziyo yakho iyahamba, ngendlela enhle? Manje lokho kubalulekile imininingwane yesayensi ongayihlafuna.

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