Kungani Isikhathi Sokubhidliza Inganekwane Yomama Ophelele

Ayikho into enjengokuphelela ekubeni ngumama. Akekho umama ophelele njengokuthi ayikho ingane ephelele noma umyeni ophelele noma umndeni ophelele noma umshado ophelele.

Impilo nokuphila kahle kuthinta ngamunye wethu ngokuhlukile. Le yindaba yomuntu oyedwa.

Umphakathi wethu ugcwele imilayezo, kokubili okusobala nokufihlekile, okwenza omama bazizwe bengafaneleki - {textend} noma ngabe sisebenza kanzima kangakanani. Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi esimweni sanamuhla sedijithali lapho sihlale sihlonywa izithombe ezivusa "ukuphelela" kuzo zonke izingxenye zempilo - {textend} ikhaya, umsebenzi, umzimba.

Kungenzeka ngibe nesibopho sezinye zalezo zithombe. Njenge-blogger yesikhathi esigcwele nomdali wokuqukethwe, ngiyingxenye yesizukulwane esidala izithombe ezijabulisayo eziveza kuphela ama-reels avelele ezimpilo zethu. Kodwa-ke ngizoba ngowokuqala ukuvuma ukuthi yize imithombo yezokuxhumana ingahlali ingeyamanga, kodwa ngokuphelele ezikhethiwe. Futhi ingcindezi enkulu eyidalayo yokuba "umama ophelele" iyingozi empilweni nasenjabulweni yethu.

Ayikho into enjengokuphelela ekubeni ngumama. Akekho umama ophelele njengokuthi ayikho ingane ephelele noma umyeni ophelele noma umndeni ophelele noma umshado ophelele. Ngokushesha lapho sithola futhi samukela leli qiniso elibaluleke kakhulu, sisheshe sizikhulule kokulindelwe okungenangqondo okunganciphisa injabulo yethu futhi kususe umqondo wethu wokuzihlonipha.

Lapho ngiqala ukuba ngumama eminyakeni eyi-13 edlule, ngangilwela ukuba umama ophelele engambona ku-TV ngenkathi ngikhula eminyakeni yama-80s kanye neye-90s. Bengifuna ukuba ngumama omuhle, onomusa, onesineke owenza konke kahle nangokulungile ngaphandle kokudela ubufazi bakhe.

Ngibheke ukuba ngumama ofanele njengokuthile okufeza ngokusebenza kanzima, njengokungena ekolishi elihle noma ukuqashelwa umsebenzi wakho wephupho.

Kodwa empeleni, ukuba ngumama kwakukuncane kakhulu kunalokho engangikucabanga ngisemncane.

Eminyakeni emibili ngibe ngumama ngazithola ngicindezelekile, ngedwa, nginesizungu futhi nginqamula kimi nakwabanye. Nganginezingane ezingaphansi kweminyaka emibili futhi ngangingalali amahora angaphezu kwamabili kuya kwamathathu ebusuku ezinyangeni.

Indodakazi yami yokuqala yaqala ukukhombisa izimpawu zokubambezeleka kokukhula (kamuva kwatholakala ukuthi inesifo sofuzo) kanti indodakazi yami eyayiselusana yayingidinga ubusuku nemini.

Ngangesaba kakhulu ukucela usizo ngoba ngobuwula ngathenga umqondo wokuthi ukucela usizo kusho ukuthi ngingumama omubi futhi onganele. Ngizamile ukuba yikho konke kuwo wonke umuntu futhi ngacasha ngemuva kwesifihla sikamama ophelele onakho konke ndawonye. Ekugcineni ngashayeka phansi kwatholakala ukuthi nginesifo sokucindezeleka kwangemva kokubeletha.

Ngalesi sikhathi, ngaphoqeleka ukuthi ngiqale phansi futhi ngifunde ukuthi lokho kusho ukuthini ukuba ngumama. Bekufanele futhi ngiphinde ngiphinde ngibe ngumama - {textend} hhayi ngokwalokho okushiwo abanye, kepha ngokwalokho okungcono kakhulu kunami kanye nezingane zami.

Ngaba nenhlanhla yokuthola usizo lwezokwelapha ngokushesha futhi ekugcineni ngakwazi ukunqoba lesi sifo esincisha amandla ngosizo lwe-anti-depressants, ukuxhaswa komndeni nokuzinakekela. Kuthathe izinyanga eziningi ukwelashwa kwezinkulumo, ukufunda, ukucwaninga, ukubhala ngezindaba, ukuzindla nokuzindla ekugcineni ukubona ukuthi umbono kamama ophelele wawuyinganekwane. Bengidinga ukuyeka le nhloso ebhubhisayo uma ngifuna ukuba ngumama obegcwaliseka ngempela futhi ethula izingane zami.

Ukuyeka ukuphelela kungathatha isikhathi eside kwabanye kunabanye. Kuxhomeke ebuntwini bethu, imvelaphi yomndeni, nesifiso sokushintsha. Into eyodwa ehlala iqinisekile, noma kunjalo, ukuthi uma uyeka ukuphelela, empeleni uqala ukwazisa isiphithiphithi nobubi bomama. Amehlo akho ekugcineni avulekele bonke ubuhle obulele ngokungapheleli bese uqala uhambo olusha lokukhumbula ukuba ngumzali.

Ukuba ngumzali ocabangelayo kulula kakhulu kunalokho esicabanga. Kusho nje ukuthi sikuqonda ngokuphelele esikwenzayo kulowo mzuzu. Siba khona ngokugcwele futhi sizazi ngokugcwele izikhathi zansuku zonke esikhundleni sokuziphazamisa ngaloyo msebenzi noma umthwalo olandelayo. Lokhu kusisiza ukuba sazise futhi sihlanganyele enjabulweni elula yokuba ngumama njengokudlala imidlalo, ukubukela i-movie, noma ukupheka ndawonye njengomndeni esikhundleni sokuhlala sihlanza noma silungiselela isidlo esifanelwe yiPinterest.

Ukuba ngumzali ocabangelayo kusho ukuthi asisasichithi isikhathi sethu sigxila kokungenziwanga kepha esikhundleni salokho sigxila ekugxileni kulokho esingazenzela khona thina nabathandekayo bethu ngalowo mzuzu, noma ngabe kukuphi.

Njengabazali, kubaluleke kakhulu ukusetha okulindelwe kanye nemigomo yethu kanye nezingane zethu. Ukwamukela isiphithiphithi nezinxushunxushu zempilo kuzuzisa umndeni wethu wonke ngokuwufundisa inqubo lapho sizamukela thina nabathandekayo bethu ngenhliziyo ephelele. Siba nothando ngokwengeziwe, uzwela, ukwamukela nokuxolela. Kubalulekile ukuthi siziphendulele ngezenzo zethu zansuku zonke, kepha kufanele sikhumbule kuqala ukwamukela zonke izinhlangothi zobumama, kufaka phakathi ezimbi nezimbi.

U-Angela ungumsunguli nombhali webhulogi lokuphila elidumile uMommy Diary. Une-MA ne-BA kwezobuciko besiNgisi nobokubukwa kanye neminyaka engaphezu kwengu-15 yokufundisa nokubhala. Lapho ezithola njengomama ozodwa futhi ocindezelekile wezingane ezimbili, wafuna ukuxhumana kwangempela nabanye omama waphendukela kumabhulogi. Kusukela lapho, ibhulogi yakhe yangasese isiphenduke indawo yokuphila ethandwayo lapho egqugquzela futhi ethonya abazali emhlabeni wonke ngokuxoxa kwakhe izindaba nokuqukethwe kokudala. Ungumnikeli ojwayelekile we-TODAY, Parents, ne-The Huffington Post, futhi ubambisene nemikhiqizo eminingi yezingane, imindeni kanye nemikhiqizo yokuphila. Uhlala eSouthern California nomyeni wakhe, izingane ezintathu, futhi usebenza encwadini yakhe yokuqala.