Kuyini Ukuhoxa, futhi Kungani Abantu Bephendukelwa Yiyo?

-Delile

• Kuyini Ukugoqa Amankentshane? Isifundo Somlando Osheshayo
• Kungani Abantu Bengena Ku-Cuckolding
• Ungaqala Kanjani NgeCuckolding
• Khululeka, Zithandi Ze-Sexy!
• Buyekeza kwe-

Ukupheka inkukhu, yize kungabonakali kwaziwa kakhulu noma kukhulunywa ngakho, empeleni kuyiphupho elijwayelekile kakhulu phakathi kwezithandani. Ekucwaningeni ngencwadi yakhe Ngitshele Okufunayo, u-Justin J. Lehmiller, Ph.D., wenza inhlolovo kubantu baseMelika abangu-4 175 futhi wathola ukuthi amaphesenti angu-26 abesifazane abathanda ubulili obuhlukile, amaphesenti angu-52 amadoda anobulili obuhlukile, amaphesenti angu-42 abesifazane abangenabo ubulili obuhlukile, namaphesenti angu-66 amadoda angewona ubulili obuhlukile ayekade ecabanga ngokuhuquza. Kukhona ngisho nama-subreddits aphelele ku-Reddit anikelwe emphakathini we-r/cuckold, r/cuckholdstories, kanye ne-r/cuckoldpsychology ngayinye enamashumi ezinkulungwane zamalungu.

Kepha kusho ukuthini ukhukhi?

Lapha, izimpendulo kuyo yonke imibuzo yakho ye-cuckolding (kanye neminye okungenzeka ukuthi ubungazi nokuthi unayo) kanye nezeluleko zokuthi ungaxhumana kanjani mayelana ne-cuckolding nomlingani wakho (abalingani bakho).

Hlala uhlale phansi, uphumule, futhi uzivumele ubheke ukuthi kungenzeka yini ukuthi kube nokuzidela okusha kocansi.

Kuyini Ukugoqa Amankentshane? Isifundo Somlando Osheshayo

Umlando we-cuckolding ungaba inkimbinkimbi - kodwa yingakho nje, njengomfundisi wezocansi kanye nodokotela wobudlelwane, nginentshisekelo enkulu yokufundisa, ukuqeda ukucwaswa, kanye nokunika abantu amandla okwamukela lokho abayikho. (Ngisho nezingxenye zakho ongazazi namanje!)

I-TBH, angiyena umlandeli wencazelo esemthethweni ye-intanethi ye-cuckold. Kepha, ngenxa yomlando nokuqhubeka nokwephula izinkolelo-ze ze-heteronormitve emphakathini wethu, ake sikhulume ngakho.

Ngokusho kukaMerriam-Webster, ikhukhi yindoda enomfazi ongathembekile. Unkosikazi wendoda ephingayo uyinkukhu.

Isibonelo: In Hamilton, ngemva kokuthola ukuthi u-Alexander Hamilton ngokwakhe ubelele nomunye wesifazane, umyeni wakhe ubhalela u-Hamilton ethi "uh oh, wenze i-sucker engalungile i-cuckold."

Eminyakeni edlule (ngiyabonga ubuhle), igama elithi cuckolding liguqukele ekuchazeni okuthile ngaphezulu emigqeni yesibeletho noma ikink lapho umuntu (ovame ukubizwa ngokuthi "inkukhu") akhanyiswa ngumlingani wakhe (ovame ukubizwa ngokuthi "inkosikazi yenkukhu" ) ukuya ocansini nomunye umuntu (okuvame ukubizwa ngokuthi "inkunzi"). Ezimweni eziningi, i-cuck ivuliwe ngokuqondile ukubukela umlingani wabo ocansini nomunye umuntu.

Vele, njengamanye amagama amaningi emkhakheni wezocansi, incazelo ngqo ingafinyelela encazelweni yombhangqwana ngamunye nokuthi yini umuntu ngamunye akuvumela ngenjabulo (mhlawumbe ngemuva kwezingxoxo ezinde ngamazinga enduduzo).

Kulezi zinsuku, ungaxoxisana nemibhangqwana eminingana ebamba iqhaza ekuphathweni kwezinkukhu futhi ngamunye angaba nemibono ehlukile ngalokho okushiwo ukhukhi kubo - lowo ngumlingo wokuxhumana, ukuzama, kanye nezwe eliguqukayo lezocansi!

Kungani Abantu Bengena Ku-Cuckolding

Uma ungakaze uzwe nge-cuckolding noma ungakaze uthande umbono wokuzama, ungahle uzibuze ukuthi kungani imibhangqwana eminingi kangaka ikuthola kumnandi kakhulu.

Kubantu abaningi, umqondo wokubuka umlingani wabo enza izinto ezi-sexy nomunye umuntu awuthokozisi. Ake ngikudwebele isithombe: Uthola ukulala nomuntu othandana naye njalo futhi kusobala ukuthi kuyashisa! Kepha, kuyaqabukela uthola ukubona ukuthi kubukeka kanjani kusuka kwamanye ama-engeli nokuthi abukeka kanjani ngempela ngenkathi wenza ucansi. Ngisho, yi-porn-live action, phambi kobuso bakho, futhi umlingani wakho uyinkanyezi. (Okuhlobene: Kungenzeka kanjani ukuthi i-Virtual Reality Porn ibuthinte kanjani Ubulili nobuhlobo?)

Kwabanye abantu abajabulela i-voyeurism (ukujabulela ukubuka abantu benza ucansi), ukubuka kujabulisa ngempela njengokuseseshini (mhlawumbe nangaphezulu). Futhi kulabo ababonisa umbukiso (labo abakujabulela ukuya ocansini phambi kwabanye), lokhu futhi kuyindlela emnandi yokukuhlola lokho.

Futhi, kungabuye kube khona amandla we-sexy amandla lapho kudlalwa esimweni se-cuckold. Imvamisa, inkunzi isendimeni ebaluleke kakhulu, idala indawo noma isimo lapho bobabili noma omunye wabantu bekwazi ukuzithoba.

Ngokuya ngobulili babantu abathintekayo, i-cuckolding futhi ingaba yindlela enhle yokuhlola ubulili bakho ngenkathi uhlala ebudlelwaneni obukhona. Iqiniso elijabulisayo: Bangaphezu kuka-12,000 abantu abasesha i-Google i- "bi cuckold" njalo ngenyanga. (Okuhlobene: Kusho Ukuthini Ubungqingili, Akusho, nokuthi Ungazi Kanjani Uma Ungu-Bi)

Futhi kwabanye abantu, ukuthotshiswa ngamankonyane kuyisisekelo esikhulu; ngokuyisisekelo, umqondo wokukhohliswa (ngokuvumelana) uletha imizwa yomona nokululazeka okungaba ukuvuleka okukhulu. Ukuthotshiswa empeleni kuyiphupho elivamile futhi kuhlobene eduze nokudlala okuzithobayo.

I-Cuckolding empeleni iyisitsha lapho kungenzeka khona izinto eziningi ezithokozisayo: ukucindezela (isenzo sokuthola injabulo ekujabuleleni nasekukhuleni komlingani wakho), umona (okungeyona ngempela into embi), ukufeza iphupho, umdlalo wamandla izimo azipheli.

Ungaqala Kanjani NgeCuckolding

Manje, njengoba usufundile ngokufuya amankanka, uqala kanjani? (Uma wena nomlingani wakho ninesifiso sokuzama.)

Isiphakamiso sami sokuqala ukukhuluma. Lokhu kuzwakala kusobala, kepha ake ngichaze.

Okokuqala, khulumani ngalokho ngamunye wenu akuthola ku-sexy ngombono we-cuckolding nokuthi kungani. Ngemuva kwalokho chaza ngeqhaza umuntu ngamunye azobamba iqhaza kulo uma / noma ukuphuziswa kukankukhu kuzokwenzeka. Ngale ndlela nobabili ekhasini elilodwa futhi ungaqala ukucabanga ngefantasy efanayo.

Bese, yifake ekamelweni - kodwa njengoba nje nobabili. Ngenkathi niya ocansini, xoxani ngocansi ndawonye ngokuthi ngabe kwenzekani njengamanje ukube nisesimweni sokuquleka. Umuntu ngamunye ake abelane ngalokho abekade ekwenza, ukuthi yini abangafuna ukuthi umlingani wakhe ayenze, nokuthi umuntu wesithathu uzobe enza ini. Ungase futhi ucabangele ukubuka ezinye ze-ethics cuckolding porn ukuze uthole ukuzijabulisa ngalo mbono futhi ubone ukuthi zingadlala kanjani. (Okuningi lapha: Ungaba kanjani ne-Healthy Threesome)

Lokhu kubalulekile ngoba kukwenza kube ngokoqobo ngokwengeziwe futhi kukuvumela ukuthi nidlale le fantasy ndawonye ngaphambi kokungena kunoma yini.

Bese, qala ukubheka! Kunezinhlelo zokusebenza eziningi ezihlanganisa ucansi izithandani ezingazisebenzisa ukuze zithole isithandwa esivela eceleni ukuze zijoyine ubumnandi. IHashtag Open ivumela imibhangqwana ukuthi yenze iphrofayili mayelana nayo, ukuthi ifunani, nokuthi ikhululeke ini ngokwamalungiselelo. Lokhu kuqinisekisa ukuthi abantu banganciphisa usesho lwabo ukuze bathole abantu abafanelekile bokuzijabulisa ngenkukhu. I-Feeld ingolunye uhlelo lokusebenza olukhuthaza ucansi lwabashadikazi nabangashadile abafuna "ukuthandana nokudlula okujwayelekile."

Izwi kwabahlakaniphileyo: Ungalokothi "umangaze" noma ubani ophethe ikhukhamba (noma noma yini ephathelene nocansi ngalokho). Uma othile evuma ukulala nawe kodwa uhlose ukumletha ekhaya kumlingani wakho... akuyona indlela engcono kakhulu leyo. Ukwethembeka, ukuxhumana ngokweqile, nokuhlela kuyadingeka ekuhlangenwe nakho okuningi kocansi - futhi ungithembe, kwenza isikhathi esimnandi sibe ngcono uma singenazinkathazo futhi imingcele/imikhawulo yawo wonke umuntu isobala! (Okuhlobene: Ungayisetha Kanjani Imingcele Nanoma Ubani Empilweni Yakho)

Khululeka, Zithandi Ze-Sexy!

Uma kukhona ngokuphelele okususa kulokhu, makube: ukuxhumana, ukuxhumana, ukuxhumana. Ucansi luyinkimbinkimbi, kodwa lungaba nzima kakhulu (futhi lube mnandi kakhulu) uma uletha konke okulindelekile nemingcele obala ukuze bonke abathintekayo bakwazi ukukubona. Ngemuva kwalokho, hamba uyozijabulisa ngezinkukhu.

URachel Wright, MA, L.M.F.T., (yena) ungudokotela wezengqondo onelayisense, uthisha wezocansi, kanye nochwepheshe wezobudlelwano ozinze eNew York City.Uyisikhulumi esinolwazi, umgqugquzeli weqembu, nomlobi. Usebenze nezinkulungwane zabantu emhlabeni wonke ukubasiza ukuthi baklabalase kancane futhi bajije ngaphezulu.

Buyekeza kwe-