Ungabuzulazula Kanjani Ubudlelwano Lapho Ozakwenu Enobunzima AF Ngokuqina

-Delile

• Xhumana, musa ukubikezela.
• Ungacabangi ngokweqile, vele ungene ekuvumelaniseni.
• Nikeza ukwesekwa, ungawazi kahle umdlalo wabo.
• Umbhangqwana odlala ndawonye, ​​uhlala ndawonye.
• Buyekeza kwe-

Uma uthanda ukuzivocavoca, ukuba sebudlelwaneni nomuntu osubathi kunengqondo. (Bheka: Ubufakazi Bokuthi Ungahlangana Nama-Swolemate Wakho eGym) Nigcinana nikhuthazekile ukuzivocavoca umzimba, izithukuthuku eziningi ziyizitabane (ukuzivocavoca ngokungathi sína kwenza i-foreplay enhle kakhulu), futhi kunokuqonda ngokuhlanganyela ukuthi ukuhlala uphilile kuyindlela yokuphila. Kepha lapho omunye umlingani eqeda konke ukuncintisana noma ethatha ukuzivocavoca ngokweqile, bangashiywa bekhetha phakathi kwento ebenza bazizwe bephila kakhulu nomuntu abamthanda kakhulu.

Ngokusho komunye umgibeli odumile ongesabi, kufanele wazi ukuthi ungena kuphi ngaphambi uphushelwe onqenqemeni-noma ngabe uwena owenza okweqile noma uhlala nomlingani owenza kanjalo.

Kwifilimu esanda kukhishwa Mahhala, ebhala umlando ka-Alex Honnold umqansa ongenazintambo okhuphuka i-El Capitan (udonga lwamamitha angu-3,000 lwetshe legwala e-Yosemite National Park), u-Hornnold nentombi yakhe uCassandra "Sanni" McCandless babeka isiphetho sabo bonke ubuhlobo babo empumelelweni yomuntu oyedwa odelela ukufa. khuphuka. Njengoba u-Honnold asho kule filimu, "amaphuzu amabili amancane wokuxhumana akuvimbela ekuweni.Futhi lapho ukhuphuka, kukhona eyodwa kuphela." Nakuba abantu abaningi bengase baphendukele kancane izinhlobo ezingaphansi kwengcindezi zokukhuthaza, kuyakhuthaza ukubuka lo mbhangqwana omusha ubhekane novivinyo olukhulu bese uphuma uphila-futhi uchuma. (Noma, kunezizathu eziningi zokuthi kungani kufanele uzame ukukhuphuka kwamadwala.)

Ngisho nangesikhathi sokusondelana sikaSanni no-Alex esikrinini, ukuthi kanjani "ku-belay, belay on" kulo lonke uhambo lwabo oluyinselele kusese yimfihlakalo lapho amakhredithi eqhubeka. Sihlangane no-Alex ngengxoxo eqotho ngokujulile mayelana nobudlelwano babo nokuthi i-duo yakho ekhuthazwa ukuqina ingaphumelela kanjani.

Xhumana, musa ukubikezela.

Ebudlelwaneni bokudonsa i-adrenaline, izinga eliphezulu lokuxhumana libalulekile. Uma uqonda lokho umuntu abhekene nakho—kungaba ukulimala ngokomzimba noma ukushikashikeka kwengqondo—uzokuhlomela kangcono ukunikeza uhlobo olufanele lokusekela. Ngaphambi kokuba intukuthelo yakheke, khuluma ngalokho okubalulekile.

"Ukuxhumana kubalulekile," kusho u-Alex Umumo. Lokho kusho ukuthi "ukuthembeka, ngithi 'lokhu yimi engikudinga ukukwenza, ukuthi ngidinga ukuqeqesha kanjani, engikudinga ukukwenza.' Kumele uzizwe ukhululekile ukutshela omunye nomunye lokhu. "

Kunomzuzu obambekayo kule filimu lapho uSanni ethi, "Angifuni ukuba sendleleni yegoli lakhe. Kuyiphupho lakhe futhi kusobala ukuthi usalifuna," kodwa uyavuma ukuthi akaqondi ukuthi kungani kudingeka khulula solo El Cap. (I-FYI, ukuzihambela wedwa noma ukuzihambela wedwa kusho ukugibela ngaphandle kwezindophi, amahanisi, noma imishini yokuphepha.) Yize kuyiqiniso ukuthi wena noma umlingani wakho aningahle niyiqonde ngokugcwele kungani, into embi kakhulu ongayenza ukushiya omunye umuntu elenga ngaphandle kwencazelo. Uma benendaba ngempela, ukuvele ubazise ukuthi kubalulekile-ukuthi ukugijima marathon, ukuchoboza ama-triathlons, noma ukugibela i-El Cap-kufanele kwanele. (Okuhlobene: Izithandani Ezifanelekayo Eziyi-10 Zenza Ukusebenza Ngokuhlanganyela Kube Phambili)

Ungacabangi ngokweqile, vele ungene ekuvumelaniseni.

Akulula ukujwayela inqubo ejulile yomunye umuntu, ikakhulukazi uma unezinhloso zakho okufanele ukhathazeke ngazo. Kepha njengoba kusho u-Alex Mahhala, ukuba nomlingani kwenza impilo ibe ngcono ngazo zonke izindlela-ngakho-ke kukufanele ngokuphelele.

Esikhundleni sokubanjwa ngokungazelelwe ngamaqiniso wesimiso esiqinile sokuqeqesha, gcina ikhalenda eyabiwe futhi ube ekhasini elifanayo. Kungase kubonakale kuwukweqisa, kodwa kuyasebenza: "Sizama ngempela ukuvumelanisa amakhalenda ngokusemandleni ethu. Lokho bekuhlala kunjalo kusukela siqala ukuthandana, "kusho u-Alex. "Ngithatha indlela yokusebenzisa, ngikhulise zonke izinto enjabulweni yempilo, ukusebenza kahle kweqembu, ukuthi sihamba kanjani." Impela, uma nobabili nisebenza ngokubambisana ekugcineni isigqi esihleliwe nokugeleza, nizoba nezithiyo ezimbalwa zokubhekana nezingxabano ezimbalwa mayelana nokuthi nizihlalela nini ngempela.

Nikeza ukwesekwa, ungawazi kahle umdlalo wabo.

Ukuzivocavoca ndawonye kukhulisa isikhathi "sakithi", kodwa lokho akusho ukuthi kufanele uziphoqe ukugijima amabanga amade ngoba umlingani wakho ungumgijimi webanga elide. Iqiniso: Kungakhungathekisa ngendlela emangalisayo uma omunye wakho obalulekile eneshejuli yokuqeqeshwa enzima. Kodwa-ke, ukuzama ukuba umuntu ongeyena cishe kungashubisa isimo futhi kukwenze uzizwe ungafaneleki lapho ungakwazi ukuqhubeka (noma ngephutha uvumele isoka lakho liwe entabeni... bheka: Mahhala).

“Kubalulekile ukuba umuntu wakho siqu,” kusho u-Alex. "Ekuqaleni, uSanni wayevame ukuzinyeza ngokungabi umgibeli. Wayethi, 'oh, kufanele ube nomuntu okwazi ukugibela kangcono.' Ekugcineni, kuhlale kukhona umuntu oqwala kangcono. Nginabalingani abaningi besilisa abagibelayo. Bengizikhathaza ngokuthi u-Sanni ube umuntu olungile; umuntu olungile, othakazelisayo, ojabulayo, okhaliphile, ojabulisayo ukuba naye, othenjiswe umshado, nohola abakhe. ukuphila okwamenza waneliseka kakhulu. Yilokho okubaluleke kakhulu." (Okuhlobene: Kunjani Ngempela Ukuphola Imodeli Yokuqina Kwabesilisa)

Ukuzivocavoca kungase kube ingxenye engenakuhlukaniswa yobudlelwane bakho, kodwa akumele kube into ebukela phansi ukuzethemba kwakho. Vumela umlingani wakho azichoboze izinhloso zakhe, ungavumeli izinhloso zabo zikuchoboze. Futhi lokho kuyashiwo: Kufanele uzizwe ukhululekile ukwenza izinto ozithandayo ngaphandle kokuzwa sengathi kufanele ufake nomlingani wakho. Ngokunikeza amandla omunye nomunye ukuphishekela izinkanuko zomuntu ngamunye, ngeke nje ukhulise umuzwa wokuzimela (into ebalulekile kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo) futhi ugweme ukuzizwa sengathi udinga ukuxolisa ngokuzibophezela kokuqina, kepha futhi awusoze waphelelwa izinto sikhulume ngesikhathi sedina.

Umbhangqwana odlala ndawonye, ​​uhlala ndawonye.

Ayikho into emnandi ngokusha. Kulungile ukudedela lezo zimiso zokuziphatha ezihlasimulisayo ngezikhathi ezithile bese uvumela ubudlelwano bakho ukuthi buqale kabusha. Zitholele izindlela ezintsha zokunqamula ukuqeqeshwa, ube ne-adventure yothando ezenzakalelayo, bese ubuyela ekudleni kwakho futhi uzizwe uvuselelwe kabusha.

Ku Mahhala, U-Alex noSanni bayakujabulela ukugibela ndawonye, ​​kepha akusikho okubasekelayo. “Senza konke okunye, sigibele ibhayisikili lezintaba, sishushuluza, futhi siqwale ndawonye inani elilinganayo,” kusho u-Alex. "Sihamba ndawonye kakhulu. Ngehlobo eledlule, senze uhambo lwezinyanga ezintathu sizungeze i-Europe. Saya eMorocco. Kuleli hlobo, besihlala evenini izinyanga ezimbili." (Related: Ngihlangane Nothando Lwempilo Yami eSoulCycle)

Nakuba singeke sonke sifeze amaphupho ethu e-#vanlife, singafunda efomini ewinayo ka-Alex: ukulinganisa ushintsho nokugxila nge-aplomb. "Kube wuhambo oluthokozisayo empilweni. Njengoba ubona kule filimu, akukona nje ukukhuphuka kuphela, kodwa impilo yami eyizungezile eyenza ukuthi kwenzeke lokhu. Ubudlelwano bami noSanni buyenza bube khona."

Buyekeza kwe-