Ngabe Umatasa Ngempela Noma Unesizungu Nje * Ngempela?

-Delile

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Ngo-Okthoba 2019, ngaba nalokho engingakusho ngobuqotho kwakungenye yezinhlupho ezinonya kakhulu engake ngabhekana nazo: Kwavele kwangalindelekile, ngangidabuke ngokuphelele, futhi ngangingenazo izimpendulo kunoma yikuphi ukuhlukumezeka engangikuzwa. Into yokuqala engiyenzile? Ngabhuka iholidi, ngasebenza ubusuku nemini, futhi ngagcwalisa impilo yami yokuzijabulisa. Ezinyangeni ezimbalwa ezizayo, angicabangi ukuthi ngithole ukuthi ukuhlala ekhaya ngedwa kunjani. Ukuhumusha: Ngisanda kuthola matasa ebengingazukuthola.

Ngiyazi ukuthi angingedwa: Isibalo sangaphambi kobhadane, izibalo zikhombisile ukuthi abaseMelika bebematasa kakhulu kunanini ngaphambili, bekhuphuke ngamaphesenti angama-400 kusukela ngo-1950. besebenzisa zonke izinsuku zabo zeholide, beqongelela irekhodi izinsuku ezingamaholide ezingama-768 ezingasetshenziswanga ngo-2018. Kepha noma ngabe ungazibheki njengohlobo lomsebenzi, kungenzeka ukuthi uzigcine umatasa nezinye izinto ezinjengokuhamba, ama-aphoyintimenti, ezenhlalo ukuphuma, nokwenza okungapheli kuze kube seqophelweni lapho ukudweba isikhathi sakho bekuyinto engenzekanga ngaphandle kokuthi bekusohlelweni. Uzwakala ujwayelekile? Ukucabanga kanjalo.

Ngakho-ke, lapho ubhubhane lwe-COVID-19 luhlasela futhi izinyosi ezimatasa njengawe nami saphoqeleka ukuba sehlise ijubane noma sime ngokuphelele, kwaba khona uhlobo lwemibuzo ehlangene ngani sasigijimisana okomuntu ohlanyayo ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ingabe sasi ~ ngempela ukuthi simatasa, noma besizama nje ukubalekela imizwa engakhululekile ngempela?

Manje, kulabo abasenenhlanhla yokusebenza, ukujikisa umsebenzi kuye kwaba nzima kakhulu, futhi ngamahora ajabulisayo, amaholide nemishado njengoba kumisiwe kakhulu, impilo yakho yezenhlalo ayisekho lapho ukunikeza ukuphumula ekugayeni.

"Ukwehlukana okumisiwe phakathi komsebenzi nokudlala kufiphele nakakhulu manje nge-WFH kanye nokuthola izindaba njalo," kuchaza isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo u-Matt Lundquist. "Abantu abahlukanisi phakathi kokuthi umsebenzi uphela nini futhi uqala nini, futhi ngoba abasatholi induduzo ebudlelwaneni babo obusondelene nasempilweni yezenhlalo, baziphonsa kakhulu kweminye imikhuba efana nomsebenzi nokuzivocavoca umzimba." Ngaphambi kobhubhane, sasivame ukusebenzisa izimpilo zethu zomphakathi namashejuli ukugwema imizwa engakhululekile, futhi manje, kubonakala sengathi siyaziphoqa ukuthi sihlale simatasa ngezinye izindlela zokubhekana nakho.

Ngokwe-Cigna's 2020 Loneliness Index, ucwaningo lukazwelonke oluhlola imizwa yokuba nesizungu kulo lonke elase-US, amaphesenti angama-61 abo bonke abantu abadala abasebenzayo (banoma isiphi isimo sobudlelwano) babika ukuthi bazizwa behlukanisiwe ngokwengeziwe, okwenyuka kusuka kumaphesenti ayi-12 kuphela emuva ngonyaka ka-2018. Lokhu kwanda kwesizungu okuhambisana nobhadane lwe-coronavirus olususa iziphazamiso ezijwayelekile kusho ukuthi le mizwa yokuhlukaniswa ingaba namandla kakhulu.

"Kuyiqiniso impela ukuthi i-intanethi isidalele indlela yokuthi sisebenze ngaso sonke isikhathi," kusho uRachel Wright, uL.M.F.T. "Kodwa futhi sibona ushintsho olukhulu endleleni esibona ngayo ukusondelana, nabantu abaningi besaba ubudlelwano babo noma iqiniso lokuthi abanalo lokuthi basebenza noma bathola ezinye izinto zokuzilibazisa ukuze bagweme leyo mizwa engathandeki. " Ku-crux yakho konke, ngakho-ke, umuzwa ojulile wesizungu. Mhlawumbe awunalo olunye uhlobo olubalulekile noma uhlelo lokusekela olusondelene lomndeni noma abangani onomuzwa wokuthi ungathembela kubo, kodwa lesi sizungu singathinta noma ubani, ngisho nalabo abasebudlelwaneni obuzibophezele. Mhlawumbe umlingani wakho futhi unqanyuliwe ngakho, ngaphandle kokusondela kanye nesimo sobudlelwano, usazizwa sengathi awuzwakali noma ungabonwa.

Ngaphambi kobhubhane, noma wazi, cishe awumatasatasa njengoba ucabanga, kusho uWright. Esikhundleni salokho, empeleni umane udala amathuba okuxokozela ukuze ungabi nesikhathi sokucabanga ngesizungu noma nganoma imuphi umuzwa ozizwa ungakhululekile ukuhlala noma ukuvuma. Kulula ukuziphazamisa ezingxenyeni zempilo yakho lapho ucabanga ukuthi "wehlulekile," kungaba ubudlelwano obusanda kuphela, ukungakhuthazwa emsebenzini, ubungani obunobuthi, noma izingqinamba zokuzethemba nokuzethemba. "Kuyindlela elula yokuziba imizwa ebabazekayo yokungafaneleki, empeleni," kusho uWright. "Kodwa-ke, lokho abantu abangakuqondi ukuthi ukuziphonsa esicini esisodwa sempilo yakho ngeke ngempela kuguqule umphumela endaweni yokuphila kwakho oyigwemayo."

Cabanga ngakho: Uma ukhathazeka ngokuba wedwa ngoba uwedwa kuphela eqenjini labangane bakho, kulula ukuziphonsa emsebenzini ukuze ungacabangi ngakho. Noma uma ukhathazeke ngempela ngokuthi ubudlelwano bakho busezinhlelweni futhi ukuxhumana ngakho akukhululekile, ungakwazi kalula ukugcina i-Zooming nabangani noma uthathe inja okwamanje. omunye uhambe ukuze ulale ekhaya sekwephuze kakhulu ukukhuluma ngakho. “Abantu bakhona, kodwa abekho ngempela Lapho, "kuchaza uLundquist." Bangase bacabange ukuthi ukuzifaka kwezinye izici zempilo yabo kuzosiza ukulungisa izingqinamba abanazo nabangane nabanye abantu ababalulekile, kepha lokhu kuziphatha okugwema lokho kudala izinkinga eziningi kunokuba kulungiswa. " Kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi "ukuba matasa nakho kunikeza umuzwa wokuziqhenya."

Njengamanje, ngesikhathi sobhadane, abantu abaningi bahlala ndawonye nabanye ababalulekile futhi kubangela izimpi eziningi kunalokho obekulindelwe, noma banesizungu kunanini ngaphambili ngaphandle kokukwazi ukuzihlalela nabangane noma ukuya ezinsukwini ze-IRL. Ngakho-ke, wenzani? Uyasebenza, uhlela amakhabethe akho, noma uchitha amahora wenza ukudla okunemininingwane ekhishini - empeleni, wenza noma yini enye ongayenza ukuze uhlale "umatasa."

Kodwa-ke, "le mizwa izovela kabi kakhulu ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, futhi uzobe ukhathele ngokomzwelo nangokomzimba, ngeke wazi ukuthi ungayisingatha kanjani," kusho uWright. Lokhu kungasabisa kakhulu uma ungumuntu obegwema njalo ukuthi uzizwa kanjani, kepha ukunaka imizwa yakho kuyingxenye ebalulekile yenqubo, futhi njengamanje, unesikhathi sokuhlala naleyo mizwa yesizungu ngiyabonga ukuzihlukanisa ngenkani, kusho uWright. Ungakwazi ukwenza ijenali, uzindle, ube nezingxoxo ezingakhululekile, futhi uhlale nemizwa yakho ngendlela ongakaze uyenze ngaphambili.

U-Wright futhi ukhuthaza ukuphulukisa izinkolelo eziyinhloko ngemuva kokwesaba ~umuzwa ngempela,~, kahle, imizwa yakho. Emuva kwayo yonke imizwa kukhona okuku-subconscious. "Uma uzizwa sengathi uzohlala wedwa ngaso sonke isikhathi, hlala naloyo muzwa - yingoba ishende lakusho ngesikhathi esithile? Ingabe yingoba ucabanga ukuthi bonke ubudlelwano bakho buphele kabi kanti yiphutha lakho?" Kuchaza uWright. "Inkolelo umcabango nje oqhubeka ucabanga ngawo, futhi okusemqoka wukuphinda uhlele leyo nkolelo uphinde uthole izindlela ezintsha zokubhekana nezimo ezikuzungezile." Lokhu kungazwakala kusinda ngempela, kepha inzuzo iyifanele inselelo. (Okuhlobene: Ungazikhipha Kanjani Ngesikhathi Sokuhlukaniswa [noma Ngokuthembeka nganoma yisiphi isikhathi])

Kwazi bani? Ungahle uqaphele, ngalo mzamo wokuzula indawo yakho yezimayini ezingokomzwelo, ukuthi abantu abathile, imisebenzi, noma okokuzilibazisa akusakusebenzeli. "Uma ubuhlobo bungasibo obakho, noma uma ubona ukuthi isizungu sakho sibangelwa ukuthi udinga nje ukuthatha isikhathi sokuxazulula ubungane bakho nezinkinga zobudlelwane, ubungeke yini ufune ukwazi manje kunokuba kamuva?" Kusho uWright. "Into ngemizwa izizwa isaba ngempela, kodwa uma usuzinike isikhathi sokuyivuma futhi uyithokozele, ingadalula okuningi ngawe."

“Kudingeka futhi sibe nozwelo kakhulu kithina,” kusho uLundquist. "Ukuhlala nemizwa kungase kubethusa kakhulu abanye abantu - njengokuzibuza ukuthi yini abayidingayo ngosuku, noma ngabe lokho kuwukugijima epaki, ukuxhumana nabantu, noma isikhathi sodwa. Sesiyigweme imizwa yethu isikhathi eside kangangokuthi sisebenzisa i-autopilot, futhi ungavumi ukuthi sizizwa kanjani - kunalokho, senza lokho esicabanga ukuthi sikukho kufanele yenza, kunokuba senze lokho thina funa ukwenza." Ngokugxila kokungaphandle kunokugxila ngaphakathi, uzizwa unesizungu kunanini ngaphambili, ngisho noma uwena wedwa olindele lukhulu kangaka kuwena. Phela akekho owakutshela ukuthi udinga ukuzivocavoca izinsuku eziyisithupha ngesonto. - ukwenzile - futhi unamandla okushintsha lokho kulandisa noma nini lapho ufuna.

Ukusebenzisa izingxoxo zomsebenzi, zokuvivinya umzimba, zokuhamba, noma ezisezingeni eliphansi kubha enabantu abaningi (i-pre-COVID) njengekhuni lokugwema ukuthi yiziphi ezinye izinto ezingahle zikulungele kungaba lula ukubuyela kuzo, futhi okuwukuphela kwendlela yokugqashula lawa maphethini ukuwaqaphela. "Kungasabisa ukubhekana nalezi zinto, kodwa inzuzo enkulu," kusho uLundquist. "Kuzoholela empilweni enenjabulo enkulu, egculisekile ekupheleni kosuku."

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