Ukuzikhulumela Okungeyikho: Kuyini nokuthi Ungabhekana Kanjani

-Delile

• Yazi: Yibize ukuthi iyini
• Qaphela
• Qamba umgxeki wakho
• Ikheli: Yimise emikhondweni yayo
• Kubeke ngombono
• Khulumisanani
• Cabanga ‘ngokunokwenzeka’
• Vimbela: Yigcine ingabuyi
• Yiba umngane wakho omkhulu
• Iba 'umuntu' omkhulu

Ngakho-ke kuyini ukuzikhulumela okungekuhle kahle? Ngokuyinhloko, ukhuluma udoti ngokwakho. Kuhle ngaso sonke isikhathi ukubheka izindlela okudingeka sithuthukise ngazo. Kepha kukhona umehluko phakathi kokuzicabangela nokuzikhulumela okungekuhle. Ukuzikhulumela okungekuhle akukwakhi, futhi kuyaqabukela kusikhuthaze ukuthi senze noma yiziphi izinguquko: "Angikwazi ukwenza lutho kahle" uma kuqhathaniswa nokuthi "Ngidinga ukuthola izindlela zokuphatha isikhathi sami kangcono."

Futhi kwesinye isikhathi ingaqala incane, njengokukhetha izinto ezincane esingazithandi ngathi. Kepha uma singazi ukuthi kanjani qaphela,ikheli, noma ukuvimbelaukukhuluma okungekuhle, kungaphenduka ukukhathazeka futhi, ezimweni ezimbi kakhulu, ukuzizonda.

Nakhu ukuthi ungehlisa kanjani ivolumu kumgxeki wakho wangaphakathi bese ungena ebhodini ukuzithanda qeqesha kule nyanga.

Yazi: Yibize ukuthi iyini

Qaphela

Sinemicabango eminingi egijima ezingqondweni zethu njalo. Futhi iningi lemicabango yethu yenzeka ngaphandle kokuthi sikwamukele ngokuphelele ngaphambi kokudlulela kokulandelayo.

Uma ungaqiniseki noma udinga okuthile okukholisayo kokuthi ulwa nokuzikhulumela okungekuhle, zama ukubhala phansi izinto ezingezinhle ozisho kuwe usuku lonke njengoba kwenzeka. Kungabonakala ngokweqile, kepha ukuze kususwe ukukhuluma okungekuhle, kufanele sazi ukuthi empeleni kuyenzeka.

Qamba umgxeki wakho

Abanye ochwepheshe bezengqondo batusa ukuqamba umgxeki wakho. Ukunikeza lelozwi elingathandeki langaphakathi igama elihlekisayo kungasisiza silibone ukuthi liyini ngempela. Kusivimba ukuthi singazibheki njengenkinga. Futhi kwenza inkinga yangempela icace: Siqhubeka sikholwa okushiwo yizwi.

Ngakho-ke ngokuzayo lapho ukukhuluma okungekuhle kucaca, ungamane ukukususe njengokunye ukucabanga okukhathazayo. Shayela uFelicia, iThe Perfectionist, uNegative Nancy (noma noma yiliphi igama olikhethayo) ukuthi liyini. Futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, yeka ukulalela!

Ikheli: Yimise emikhondweni yayo

Kubeke ngombono

Ukuzikhulumela okungekuhle kusuka ekunciphiseni okuphansi esivumela imicabango yethu ingene. Ukukhubeka ngamazwi akho engxoxweni kuphenduka ukuthi: "Ngiyisilima esinjalo, angisoze ngawuthola umsebenzi." Kodwa ukubeka le micabango engemihle ngendlela efanele kungasisiza sithole ukuthi konakelephi ngempela. Imvamisa inkinga empeleni ixazululeka, besivele sidinga ukuyidiliza futhi siyicubungule kancane.

Khulumisanani

Kwesinye isikhathi, ukukhuluma nomngani kungasisiza ukuthi sinqobe ukuzikhulumela okungekuhle okwamanje. Ngokuzayo lapho unamahloni noma okuthile akuhambanga ngendlela obufuna ngayo, shayela othile. Ihlazo necala kukhula ngasese. Ungahlali wedwa nemicabango yakho.

Cabanga ‘ngokunokwenzeka’

Kwesinye isikhathi, into embi kunazo zonke esingayenza uma sicabanga kabi ukuthi siziphoqe ukuthi sikhulume izinto ezinhle nezinhle kithina.

Esikhundleni salokho, qala ngokusho izinto ezingathathi hlangothi ezikhomba kusisombululo esingaba khona. Esikhundleni sokucabanga, "Ngiyisehluleki," khetha ukusho, "Angizange ngenze kahle kulelo phrojekthi. Ngiyakwazi okufanele ngikwenze ngokuhlukile ngokuzayo. ” Akudingeki sizikhohlise. Kepha singaba namaqiniso, ngaphandle kokuzizonda.

Vimbela: Yigcine ingabuyi

Yiba umngane wakho omkhulu

Asisoze sabiza umngane wethu omkhulu njengesahluleki, ukwehluleka, noma isilima. Manje kungani sizizwa sengathi kulungile ukusho izinto ezinjalo kithi? Enye indlela yokushaya umgxeki wethu wangaphakathi ukuthi ube ngumngani wethu omkhulu bese ukhetha ukugxila kakhulu kuzimpawu zethu ezinhle.

Sidinga ukugubha ukuwina okuncane, izinto ezinhle esizenzayo, kanye nezinhloso esizifezayo. Futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, sidinga ukukwenza khumbulakubo ukuze ngokuzayo lapho uNegative uNancy ezama ukusigxeka, sinobufakazi bokuthi kungani enephutha.

Iba 'umuntu' omkhulu

Lapho sizibeka kithina ezintweni ezingafinyeleleki kithi, sivula umnyango wokukhuluma kabi. Iqiniso ukuthi, asikwazi ukwenza yonke into ngokufanele, futhi ayikho into enjengomuntu ophelele. Kodwa isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uChrista Smith ukubeka kahle: "Lapho sinenhloso yethu nezimpilo zethu enkulu kunokulunga, siba sikhulu kunomgxeki."

Ukuthi umgomo esiwukhethayo ngukuthula okuthe xaxa noma kumane nje kuwumsebenzi oqhubekayo, lapho sichaza kabusha ukuthi impilo “enhle” nemiphumela “emihle” ibukeka kanjani senza sikwazi ukuthola injabulo nokwaneliseka ngaphandle kokuphelela.

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