Izingxoxo Okufanele Ube Nazo Ngaphambi ‘Kwami’

-Delile

• Ingxoxo ethi "Social Life".
• I "Sizophelelaphi?" Ingxoxo
• Ingxoxo "Yezingane"
• Buyekeza kwe-

Kwenzeke ngokushesha. Izolo benihlakaza imibhalo yakhe nabangani benu futhi nifuna usuku lwesithathu, futhi namuhla nobabili nihlala efulethini. Nobabili niyazi lapho niphokophele khona-yebo!-futhi uma engakasiki isiphakamiso, uqinisekile ukuthi uzosicela maduze.

Kepha ngaphambi kokuthi uthathe isifiso, sekuyisikhathi sokuxoxa ngezihloko ezimbalwa ebezingabonakali kufanelekile ukuzikhulisa ngenkathi nisathandana nje. Kungani? "Ungacabanga ukuthi usesekhasini elilodwa, noma ukuthi uzokwazi ukwenza lezi zinto phansi komgwaqo, kodwa lokho kucabanga kuholele emishadweni eminingi engajabulisi," kuxwayisa uKaren Sherman, Ph.D., isayikholojista yobudlelwano nombhali we Umlingo Womshado! Ithole, Yigcine, Futhi Uyenze Igcine.

Ngakho ungakuhlehlisi ngolunye usuku: Yiba nalezi zingxoxo ezintathu manje ukuze siqinisekise ukuphila ngenjabulo kamuva.

Ingxoxo ethi "Social Life".

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Uma eyi-butterfly yezenhlalo futhi ungumuntu othanda ekhaya-noma ukhuluma ngokulingana komsebenzi nempilo ngenkathi usebenza ngokweqile-sinezindaba ezimbi: Ungalindeli ukuthi okunye kwalokhu kuzoshintsha ngenxa yokuthi uthintekile , ngokusho kukaSherman. "Ngikhuluma nabashadikazi abaningi ababecabanga ukuthi omunye wabo noma omunye uzohlala kahle emphakathini, noma alungise imikhuba yakhe ngemuva komshado. Kodwa lokho ngokuvamile akwenzeki," kuchaza yena. Ungakhathazeki-kunesixazululo: Konke kumayelana nokuyekethisa.

Khumbula nje: "Sidinga ukukhuluma" amagama amane abafana abazonda kakhulu, kuchaza uSherman. Ngakho yeqa noma yiziphi izethulo bese umbuza nje ukuthi uyawubona yini umsebenzi wakhe noma isimiso somphakathi sishintsha lapho usushadile. Uma lokho akutshela khona kungahambisani kahle-nalokho okufunayo, mhlawumbe angavuma ukuphuma ubusuku obubodwa kuphela ngeviki, noma uzokwethembisa ukuyeka ukusebenza ngezimpelasonto. Nobabili kufanele nizimisele ukwenza izibonelelo, kusho uSherman.

I "Sizophelelaphi?" Ingxoxo

Izithombe ze-Getty

Ngakho-ke uthuthele edolobheni elisha ukuze usebenze bese uhlangana noMnu Wonderful. Ngesinye isikhathi, uzobhekana nesinqumo: Hlala, ushiye, noma ulibangise kuma-burbs, kusho uSherman. Futhi ngaphambi kokumbuza ukuthi ubonani, udinga ukwazi ukuthi yini wena funa. Okokuqala, zibuze, "Ngifuna ukuhlala kuphi eminyakeni emihlanu noma eyishumi kusukela manje, futhi kubaluleke kangakanani kimi lokho?" U-Sherman uyaphakamisa. Futhi uma ufuna ukuba seduze nomndeni wakho-noma ucabange ukuthi angase afune ukusho kanjalo! Ngemuva kwakho konke, uma uhlala eNew York-futhi ukhulele eBrooklyn ngenkathi akhulela eMidwest-ungazizwa "usekhaya" ngenkathi enemibono ehlukile ngokuthi uzoba kuphi eminyakeni engama-30 kanye nengama-40, kusho uSherman .

Ingxoxo "Yezingane"

Izithombe ze-Getty

Kunezihloko ezithile ezibaluleke kakhulu ukudansa nxazonke, kusho uSherman. Lokhu kungenye yazo. Futhi uma izingxoxo zakho ngezingane zingadluli esivumelwaneni sokuthi nobabili nifuna izingane ngolunye usuku ngokushesha, lokho akwanele. Ngemuva kwakho konke, uma wazi ukuthi zingaki ozifunayo, futhi ufuna ukuqala ukuzama maduze nje, leyo mininingwane ingaba yiva elikhulu emshadweni wakho omncane uma ungaboni ngaso linye, kusho uSherman. Yize engabonakala engathandi, kulungile-futhi kukhiqize-ukuxoxa ngokuningiliziwe, kugcizelela uSherman. Ungakhohlwa ukuxoxa ngokuthi uzozikhulisa kanjani izingane zakho-izinto ezifana nezitayela zokuyala, izikole, noma inkolo zibalulekile. Ngaphambi kokuthi ubuze, bheka umndeni wakhe nokukhuliswa kwakhe - bobabili banikeza umbono omuhle wokuthi yini angahle ayifune (noma angayifuni!), Kuncoma uSherman.

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